Chapter Text
The first thing Jun was aware of is just how much everything hurts. The second thing that crosses his mind is that he did not remember the room he was being held in having a plush rug on the floor. Slowly Jun took stock of himself, breathing still hurt but it was a dull pain. The kind that came from having pain relief medication in his system. The arm he’d definitely heard crack at one point felt like it had been immobilized, still rods running down each side with the sticky pull of medical tape on his arm hair. He could feel bandages in about a dozen other places too. One eye was definitely swollen shut but there was a cool compress on it. Clearly someone had cared for him. Most likely not the same people who had given him these injuries in the first place.
With effort, Jun managed to get his good eye open enough to figure out where he was. Certainly not the warehouse he’d been dragged to after the mission had gone sideways. The ceiling wasn’t horribly stained concrete but instead smooth, pristine white plaster. Sitting up felt like a bad idea but he was able to turn his head a bit and from his vantage point on the floor he could make out that he was in a living room. Tetsuya was next to him, shirtless, a white bandage wrapped around the lower half of his torso.
Bits and pieces came floating back to Jun in a hazy sort of fog. Being tied to that damn chair, refusing to answer questions, and being beaten to hell and back for it. Then Tetsuya had been there, in all his glory. A burst of gunfire and grunting and then Tetsuya was kneeling in front of him. After that there was nothing but pain and then a car.
Safe house, Tetsuya must have taken them to a safe house.
That explained where they were, but it didn’t explain the man dozing on the white pleather couch above Jun. A very pretty man from what Jun could make out, with brown hair that may have at one point been carefully styled and a very nice jaw line. But still a stranger, not an agent or anyone else from Agency Jun had ever met.
Jun shifted to try to get a better look at the man but all he got was a spike of pain through his side eliciting a groan as he collapsed back against the carpet. Above him the man opened his eyes, looking down his nose at Jun. So not really asleep then, Jun concluded.
“Try not to undo my hard work, Isashiki,” The man admonished him in a startlingly smooth voice.
A voice Jun knew. One he’d heard every day at work for nearly two years now. One that floated through his dreams late at night. A voice he had never expected to hear in person.
“Chris,” Jun breathed out. “What— why— how—?”
“Yuuki collapsed after getting you two back here,” Chris answered, seemingly not caring that Jun hadn’t managed a coherent sentence. “I was just glad this all went down in Tokyo. Not much I could have done if you were halfway across the world.”
Jun blinked up at him, still very confused. “Why not send a cleanup crew?”
They literally had a whole division for this kind of thing. Formally they were called the Medical and Operations Support division but everyone just referred to them as cleanup. Because that’s what they did for the Agency. There was no reason for Chris, a handler, to be out in the field patching up downed agents.
“No cleanup when you’re off the books,” Chris responded ruefully.
Chris shifted, sitting up and swinging his legs over the edge of the couch. Jun noted he winced when he put pressure on his right arm, rolling the same shoulder as he settled.
“Off the books?” Jun asked, not making an attempt to sit up again.
“Agency was going to leave you to your fate.” Chris jerked his chin in Tetsuya’s direction. “Yuuki wasn’t exactly about to take that lying down.”
“And what, he convinced you to sign on to his suicide mission as well?” Jun asked.
Chris shrugged, a stiff uncomfortable looking motion. “Something like that. Sorry to have left you on the floor.”
Jun narrowed his eyes at the sudden change of topic. Hiding something, that was for sure.
“I nearly blew my shoulder out again dragging you two to the bathroom and then into here. No way I was going to be able to lift both of you.”
“You kept both of us from bleeding out, not sure I get to complain about being left on the floor after that.” Jun tried to flash a grin but he was pretty sure it looked more like a grimace.
Before Chris could say anything else, Tetsuya groaned, drawing both of their attention. Confusion and pain marred his face as his eyes blinked into focus, but as soon as he recognized Jun he was surging forward.
“Jun,” Tetsuya breathed out, his hands skimming over every part of Jun he could reach. “You’re alive.”
Jun chuckled, affection flooding through his chest. “Thanks to you.”
“I couldn’t leave you.” Tetsuya dropped a kiss against Jun’s hair line.
Above them, Chris cleared his throat. Tetsuya froze, hands tightening against Jun. Slowly, his gaze crept upward. Jun followed to find Chris looking down at them with a carefully neutral face.
“Hello, Yuuki,” Chris greeted.
Hesitation turned to confusion on Tetsuya’s face. “Chris?”
Chris nodded, his eyes obviously tracing where Tetsuya’s hands were resting against Jun’s neck. Like he’d been burned, Tetsuya pulled his hands back. Instantly Jun wanted the comfort of feeling Tetsuya’s callus covered hands back on his skin.
“We know how to compartmentalize,” Tetsuya said, eyes narrowing as he looked up at Chris.
Not that he looked very threatening right now. Shirtless, bandaged, skin still pale from blood loss and his hands visibly shaking against his thighs.
Chris held his hands up defensively. “Kept your secret this long, haven't I? I don’t see any reason to start talking now.”
“How?” Tetsuya asked. “We were careful on missions.”
With a sigh, Chris’s hands fell. “You were and truly I doubt anyone else would have noticed. Not even your previous handlers. I just happen to have the same training as the two of you.”
“You were an agent?” Jun asked, eyebrows knitting in confusion.
It wasn’t very common for agents to become handlers. Something about personality profiles for the two positions not having a ton of overlap. And Chris was the paragon of a handler. It was almost difficult to picture the soft spoken, even keeled Chris in the field. Though he was handsome enough for honeypot missions. Jun wouldn’t even begin to deny that.
Chris sighed again, casting his eyes to the side for a moment. “I would prefer to have this conversation in the kitchen. Can you two stand?”
Tetsuya nodded and started to carefully get to his feet but Jun grimaced.
“I might need some help with that one.” Jun smiled crookedly up at them. “Bit of a long day.”
“You can say that again.” Chris chuckled as he pushed himself to his feet. “Here.”
Jun eyed the left hand Chris offered him, remembering his earlier words about his shoulder. “You sure?”
Chris nodded. “Yeah, this is the good one. I don’t need Yuuki popping any stitches right now.”
Cautiously, Jun raised his hand and caught a hold of the one Chris was holding out. When the pain level didn’t change significantly, Jun nodded. With a grunt and surprising strength, Chris hauled Jun to his feet. As soon as Jun was stable, Chris released his hand and started for the kitchen.
“Come on,” He beckoned them. “I’ll make tea. You guys are probably hungry too.”
At his words, Jun’s stomach rumbled. Really he didn’t need any other reason to shuffle behind Chris and into the small kitchen, furnished with a tiny four seat table. Just watching the man roll his shoulder as he walked, left hand coming up to massage the muscle had Jun curious enough to follow Chris.
“You really did a number on that one, didn’t you?” Jun asked as he sank into one of the chairs with relief.
Tetsuya joined him, gingerly lowering himself into the seat next to Jun. Jun furrowed his eyes in silent question, worried that Tetsuya had started bleeding again but Tetsuya just waved him off. Still, Jun let one of hands wander under the table until he could thread his fingers with Tetsuya’s. A small comfort to both of them, but one he felt they deserved. Besides, Chris already knew everything apparently.
A humourless huff of a laugh left Chris as he picked up the kettle. “Wouldn’t exactly say I did a number on it but someone certainly did.”
“It’s what took you out of the field.” Tetsuya didn’t ask, it was a statement.
Chris nodded as he turned to the sink. The rush of water was the only sound in the kitchen for a moment. As Chris clearly took a moment to organize his thoughts, Jun let his eyes wander over the man. It almost felt surreal to be in the same room as the voice he’d been hearing over the comm for the last two years. Jun had often tried to picture what Chris would look like and yet somehow none of his musings could hold a candle to the real thing.
He was tall, just eyeballing him across the room he was probably around the same height as Tetsuya. Unlike Tetsuya though, his hair was a warm brown and while it may have been carefully combed earlier in the day, clearly the toll of the events that had transpired had changed that. It almost looked like he’d been running his fingers through it, pushing the strands away from his face. The other thing that struck Jun was that Chris clearly kept up a workout routine. Even under a loose button up and khakis, there were clear hints of a muscular physique.
As Chris turned back to put the kettle on the stove, Jun dropped his eyes. He didn’t need to get caught staring like a creep. Even if he very much was appreciating Chris’s appearance.
“You can’t be that much older than us,” Jun told him, deciding the silence had gone on too long. “I’ve never heard of an Agent named Chris.”
“Wasn’t going by Chris back then,” Chris said as he turned to inspect the contents of the cabinets. “You would have heard of me as Takigawa Yuu, if my name had ever come up.”
Tetsuya nodded. “Heard that name a few times.”
“It rings a bell,” Jun agreed.
“I was only two classes above you,” Chris told them, putting mugs on the counter and dropping tea bags into them. “In the field for five years.”
“What happened?” Jun asked, curiosity pushing him forward.
The heavy weight of that question settled clear as day across Chris’s shoulders. If Jun could see his eyes, he wondered what emotion would be there. But Chris didn’t seem to want to have this conversation facing them. Instead he turned back to the cabinets, pulling boxes out at random to examine their contents.
“My partner was a man named Tanba. He was a good man and an even better agent.” Chris spoke softly, slowly. “We’d been assigned to each other right out of training. We’d earned ourselves a reputation for being able to handle anything the Agency threw us into.”
Chris gave a hollow laugh. “Earned ourselves lots of praise from the director. But we also earned ourselves the top of the list for all the worst missions.”
“The reward for hard work,” Tetsuya said quietly.
“Excatly. And we really didn’t mind. Not back then.” Chris’s shoulders dropped as he looked forlornly down at the box of protein bars in his hands. “We were doing our duty, keeping our country safe. The toll on us didn’t matter.”
“But something went wrong?” Jun guessed.
“Yeah, you could say that.” Chris put the box back and pulled out another one. “We got bad intel, Tanba got nabbed. I barely avoided being right there with him. Happenstance, really that put him in that position over me.”
Tetsuya made a soft noise and glanced over at Jun. It wasn’t hard to guess what his partner was thinking about in that moment.
“We were after a real nasty cabal. Everyone knew what they were going to do to him.” Chris finally decided on a can of mixed nuts and a couple packs of dried fruit, setting them on the counter. “Still, it took them hours to authorize a retrieval.”
Chris’s fingers were straining against the countertop, knuckles white. “It was going to take too long for the retrieval team to get there at that point. So I made my own choice.”
“You went in after him without back up,” Jun concluded in a near whisper.
Chris nodded, as he carefully arranged a few bowls on the counter in front of himself. “It was the only option. He would have been dead otherwise.”
“You pulled him out yourself?” Tetsuya asked.
There was a pause, heavy silence hanging in the room. Chris didn’t say anything as he ripped open the bags of fruit and started pouring the contents into the bowls. The nuts were next, pinging off the ceramic in a way that sounded too happy for the conversation at hand. The teapot whistled and Chris turned the burner off.
“I--, I did,” Chris said finally.
“Did you have any backup? Intel? Your handler?” Tetsuya asked.
Chris just shook his head. “Just me, my service pistol, and whatever ammo I could carry. It got-- it got nasty in the end. By the time I got to him, Tanba was more bruises and open wounds than person. Something had caught fire along the way, stray bullet or intentional sabotage I never really learned which. He couldn’t walk and I couldn’t leave him there. Ended up dragging him out with one arm and defending us with the other.”
“Fuck,” Jun muttered.
Carefully, Chris poured steaming hot water into each mug. Left hand, Jun noted. It had probably cost Chris months of physical therapy to move the two of them around the way he did.
“Indeed,” Chris nodded. “In the end, we both lived but were too damaged to be worth much as agents any more. Tanba got the worst of it, though I think in the end it was the mental cost that forced him into early retirement.”
“And you?” Tetsuya pressed gently.
“Tore just about everything in my right shoulder that I could tear. Plus an assortment of other injuries.” Chris said matter of factly. “Even with extensive PT, I can’t pass field tests.”
“Shit,” Jun breathed out.
Chris picked up the bowls of fruit and nuts, balancing them carefully to move them to the table. Softly he commanded them to eat. The instinct of listening to Chris’s voice in the field had them reaching for the bowls. The quiet lingered as Chris ferried the mugs of tea, a bowl of sugar, and some powdered creamer to the table.
“So how did you become a handler?” Tetsuya asked as Chris finally settled into the chair across from Jun.
“I dedicated my entire adult life up until that point to working for the Agency. For protecting my country from silent threats.” Chris spooned a little sugar into his mug. “I couldn’t see myself doing anything else at that point. After I could actually get up and move on my own, I asked to be allowed to take the psych eval for the handler track.”
“And they let you?” Jun asked incredulously.
“I didn’t exactly give them much choice.” Chris was a little sheepish as he picked up his mug. “Demanded might be a better descriptor. I passed on my first attempt and that was enough for them to let me take the handler classes.”
“How long ago did all of that happen?” Tetsuya asked, picking up his own mug.
Black, Jun noted fondly. Tetsuya never added anything to his tea.
“It’s been about five years since the injury,” Chris told them. “I became a handler about four years ago.”
Jun looked over at Tetsuya. “I don’t remember hearing anything about something like that going down.”
Tetsuya shook his head. “Five years ago we were on that long term deep undercover assignment.”
“In Singapore?” Jun clarified. Tetsuya nodded. “Mmm you’re right. I guess we wouldn’t have heard anything then.”
Chris nodded. “They tried their best to keep a lid on the whole thing. They did make some changes to the agent retrieval approval policy in the wake of it all though.”
Tetsuya glowered. “Not enough.”
“The brass had their reasons.” Chris said at the same time Jun spoke.
“You got me, that’s all that really matters.”
Jun squeezed their linked hands under the table. Tetsuya squeezed back and his eyebrows unfurled a little.
“Couldn’t have done it without Chris,” Tetsuya told them. “Why did you agree to help me? You’re risking your career for this.”
“I know.” Chris nodded. “But you were going with or without me. And I couldn’t risk you ending up like me. I know what agents are willing to risk for their partners. Tanba and I weren’t ever more than friends and I still put everything, including my own life on the line for him.”
“You’ve almost lost your career once,” Tetsuya challenged. “Why would you risk that again?”
Something in Chris seemed to snap at Tetsuya’s words. “I’ve spent the last two years keeping you two alive and as uninjured as possible! Why would I stop now!? Tell me that, Yuuki. Why would I let you run headlong into danger without me, knowing I could help you?! And good thing I did too! Or you both would be slowly bleeding out in the entry way!”
“Because it was my decision to go after my partner,” Tetsuya growled back. “You had every right to leave me to my fate.”
“Partner, you’re too used to hiding behind that word,” Chris accused. “I know what he means to you! I know what you would have done. What if he wasn’t at the warehouse? What would have happened then? Gone on a crusade to find him? What if you found the worst and it broke you? Or worse, what if you went to the cafe first and were captured? How could I live with myself knowing I could have prevented that?”
“You would have done the same for any agent?” Tetsuya asked.
Chris visibly hesitated at Tetsuya’s sudden question. His eyes flicked nervously between the two of them.
“Chris,” Jun cajoled quietly. “Would you have risked your career like this for any agent?”
Chris swallowed thickly. “Yes.” His voice shook.
“You’re out of practice,” Tetsuya said softly. “I would expect you to be a better liar than that.”
“My reasons are my own,” Chris tried to deflect.
“It would seem they involve us, at least to some degree,” Jun pointed out. “I would say that’s reason enough that we should know.”
Chris glanced at both of them and then down at the mug cradled in his large hands. Jun stole at glance at Tetsuya who was watching Chris with a pensive, solemn expression. Jun knew that look. He was taking the pieces Chris had given them and turning them over in his mind, trying to figure out how they fit together. Sometimes though, the answer was more emotional than logical. And emotions were usually Jun’s territory in their partnership.
“We just want to understand,” Jun told him softly. “You took a big risk for us today. We’re grateful, truly. We just want to know why. That’s all. We won’t hold it against you, whatever it is.”
Somehow Chris’s face got even sadder. The edges of his lips curling down, his eyebrows falling, eyes falling closed. In a voice barely more than a whisper, he said, “You might.”
“I think that’s for us to decide at this point,” Tetsuya said evenly.
“I’m not sure I can continue to be your handler, if I tell you,” Chris’s voice held a strained quality to it now.
“If we all keep our jobs, they might end up separating us anyway,” Tetsuya pointed out.
“All the more reason to tell us,” Jun followed up.
Chris sighed, idly playing with the spoon in his mug. The key to an effective interrogation was to know when to stop speaking. Jun had learned that in training, but he’d learned it was a useful tool in other aspects of life as well. And right now, Chris needed to be left alone. Tetsuya seemed to agree, throwing Jun a pointed look as he plucked a few nuts out of the bowl. Jun nodded in agreement, reaching for the freeze dried strawberries. For his part, Chris didn’t move more than the hand playing with his spoon. He kept his head bowed, shoulders hunched inward.
After a long moment of silence, he picked his head up to look at each of them in turn. Jun tried to project an aura of safety and understanding. He was never quite as good as Tetsuya was at that kind of thing. Even with his propensity to keep a straight face, there was something about the way Tetsuya held himself that just made you feel safe. Like no matter what, everything would be okay in the end.
“I should have asked to be transferred to a different agent pair about six months after I was assigned to you,” Chris said when he finally spoke.
That was not what Jun had been expecting at all. “Why?”
Tetsuya echoed the question with a tilt of his head.
“Because that’s around when I started having feelings for you. Both of you.” Chris’s eyes dropped back to his cup. “I thought it was just infatuation at first and that it would fade away naturally but it never has.”
Jun caught Tetsuya’s eye and raised his eyebrows in surprise. Tetsuya tilted his head in silent question. Without hesitation Jun nodded. They were on the same page here. He reached out slowly and let his fingers brush the back of Chris’s hand. When Chris looked up, the corners of his eyes were distinctly wet.
“Took you six months, but I’m pretty sure I started falling for you from the first time you spoke,” Jun told him gently.
The melancholy look Chris had been sporting since they’d begun this conversation morphed into genuine surprise. Like he couldn’t believe the words he was hearing. Tetsuya shifted in the corner of Jun’s vision and Chris startled, eyes swinging to Tetsuya in a wild way.
Tetsuya nodded. “Definitely somewhere in that first mission.”
“You too?” Chris questioned in a soft hesitating whisper.
Tetsuya nodded.
“But—,” Chris stole a glance at Jun. “Why?”
Jun laughed. “It would have been harder not to fall in love with you. Cool, calm, collected, intelligent, witty when you want to be. Not to mention your voice is incredibly attractive.”
“Oh,” Was all Chris seemed to be able to muster as a response.
“Good list, Jun,” Tetsuya rumbled. “I think I’d add charming as well.”
“All of those things add up to make him charming.” Jun smiled, not taking his eyes off of Chris. “It’s like the parent category. I was listing specifics.”
Tetsuya chuckled. “Is that what you were doing? I thought it was flirting.”
Jun shook his head. “I was trying to be genuine.”
The corner of Chris’s lip twitched upward as they bantered. Jun smiled broadly back at him.
“None of it was a lie.” Jun told him with a crooked grin.
“Thank you,” Chris nodded. “So where do we go from here?”
Tetsuya and Jun exchanged a brief look and it was all Jun needed. As always, they were on the same page.
“Personally,” Jun started slowly. “I’d like to kiss you and then I think some real sleep is in order for all of us.”
“Sounds like a good plan to me,” Tetsuya agreed. “Chris?”
“I—,” Chris cut himself off, hands tightening around his mug. “Are you sure? Because I don’t think I’ll be able to stop after just one kiss.”
Jun grinned at him. “Oh, I know I won’t be able to. So please kiss me.”
Hesitantly, Chris got to his feet. He moved like he thought everything would be ripped away from him if he rushed. When he rounded the table, he just gazed down at Jun like he still couldn’t believe what was happening.
“I think you’re gonna have to come to me,” Jun quipped with a grin.
That seemed to spur Chris into motion. Slowly he leaned down, hands coming up to cup Jun’s jaw oh so carefully. Their lips met in a gentle, almost delicate kiss. It was sweet, perfect, and far too short. Chris held his eyes for a moment when he pulled back but they quickly flicked over his shoulder. Jun looked behind him to find Tetsuya holding Chris’s gaze with a soft expression and a slight head tilt.
“He wants to know where his kiss is,” Jun translated for Chris with a giggle. “You’re gonna have to remember how to talk, Tetsu. Gonna take him a bit before he can read your body language.”
Tetsuya huffed. “I would very much like to kiss you as well.”
The formality of Tetsuya’s speech didn’t seem like a deterrent for Chris. The opposite maybe, as he pulled away from Jun with a lingering glance, his fingertips sliding against Jun’s jawline. A little quicker than he had approached Jun, Chris made his way to Tetsuya. But he held his face with the same amount of care, when he bent to make their lips meet.
It was a very pretty sight indeed. One that Jun could certainly get used to seeing. The tender care that Chris took with Tetsuya. The way Tetsuya seemed to absolutely melt under it. Gorgeous, Jun could watch them kiss for ages. Truly he was a lucky man. Not only did he have Tetsuya, a man so good Jun could only strive to be his equal, he was going to have a chance with the only other man who had ever captivated him in the same way.
Chris pulled back from Tetsuya and murmured, “Is this real?”
“I certainly hope so,” Tetsuya replied gently.
Tetsuya looked like he was going to say something else but was cut off with a yawn. Chris chuckled as he stepped back from Tetsuya.
“Let me straighten up real quick and then we’ll see about a nap.”
“We should talk more,” Tetsuya protested, even as he passed his empty mug to Chris.
“Later, you two had a long day,” Chris told them gently. “I don’t want you saying anything you’ll regret later due to fatigue.”
“No regrets here,” Jun said sincerely before a grin slid across his face. “Well, except maybe getting kidnapped.”
Chris sighed and shook his head. “I could have done without that part as well. Next time I tell you to leave, I expect you to listen.”
“Why?” Jun asked grin growing impossibly wider. “Now I know I have two dangerous, gorgeous men who will come rescue me.”
Chris sighed, but Jun could see the amusement peeking through. “Don’t make a habit of it.”
Jun just shrugged cheekily and winked, which he was sure was going to annoy Chris well into their relationship.
“No promises.”