Chapter Text
Cloud pushed his goggles further back on his head and examined the familiar terrain. Squinting a bit, he could just make out Edge in the distance. If he pushed hard, he could be there by nightfall. He frowned, sitting back on the bike. He didn’t want to go back to the house he shared with Tifa and the kids.
Though he had been gone a week, part of him wished he could stay away longer. He wanted to be desperate to get back. He loved them. He even missed them in a vague, disconnected way. Cloud sighed. They deserved better. They deserved someone who wasn’t relieved to be heading out the door every other day.
It wasn’t even anything they had done. Life had been quiet for too long and not long enough. Running deliveries wasn’t the most glamorous job but it kept him occupied, put food on the table, and gave him the time he was sure he needed to think. He kept hoping that given enough peace and quiet, whatever was bothering him would work its way to the surface. Since geostigma and the last world saving face off with Sephiroth, everything felt mildly out of joint - like something had been amputated and he couldn’t quite find his balance again. Edge didn’t feel like home. It was just the next place to be.
Giving in to the swirl of discomfort, he turned his bike away from the city and hit the gas. One more night to himself wouldn’t hurt. For a short time, he lost himself in dodging boulders and listening to the well-tuned hum of the powerful engine. Testing his mako-sharpened reflexes against something real still felt good. It had been years since he’d had another swordsman to spar with. Driving at break-neck speed through unforgiving terrain was as close as he could get these days.
The rest of the drive passed in an eye-blink. He parked a short way away from his destination. The last pink band of sunset was fading as he spread his bedroll out beside the place he thought of as Zack’s shrine. He pulled off his gloves and goggles and stretched out on his back. Closing his eyes, he reached out and rested one hand against the flat of the old buster sword. It was rusted and gritty from long exposure to the elements, but it still felt familiar.
--
Soft golden light slanted through the hole in the ceiling and filtered through the stained glass in tiny rainbows. The daffodils swayed slowly in the gentle breeze, pushing their way up through the floorboards around the pond and filling the air with a clean, living scent. He sat down among them, drinking in the rare feeling of peace. He allowed himself to drift with it, letting the confusion and inner turmoil settle.
After a time, he caught the faint scent of roses among the daffodils. Cloud closed his eyes, inhaling deeply. He was sure he would know that smell anywhere no matter how long it had been. Fairly certain he was dreaming, the sound of an equally familiar and beloved voice didn’t come as much of a surprise.
“They’re not supposed to be dead you know. This wasn’t the way it should have worked out.”
“They who?”
“You know who I’m talking about, silly,” she leaned forward and flicked him gently on the nose, “It’s not like you’ve forgotten any more than I have.” She tossed her bangs out of her face and smiled ruefully up at him. Gaea, he’d missed her. “It’s mostly my fault, I think. I got in the way and didn’t even realize. Oh well. Always easiest to see backwards.”
“You’ve lost me,” he smiled down at the woman who had been – was – one of his dearest friends.
“Zack and Sephiroth.”
His eyes widened and he stared at her in disbelief. “Aerith,” he spoke cautiously, half afraid she would vanish when he said her name aloud, “Zack’s been gone a long time and after everything that’s happened I’m pretty sure Sephiroth will never die completely.”
“Not true, Cloud. He’s gone now,” the Ancient sighed sadly, “Truly gone from the world.”
Cloud would have expected to feel relief at hearing that, but instead he just felt even more lost. He supposed it meant he could stop worrying about the next battle and settle into running deliveries and helping Tifa out with Denzel and Marlene… for the rest of his life. The world was finally safe. So why did it seem like there was nothing left for him?
Cloud stood there in silence, head bowed. Aeris ruffled his soft blond hair understandingly. “What do I do now?” he asked finally, voice breaking on an emotion he didn’t have a name for, “And what does it matter that they’re not supposed to be gone? They are.”
“I have a request. I know you’ve been feeling out of place. In a way, you are. Your path has always been entwined with theirs. With them gone, there’s nothing to anchor you here.”
“That doesn’t sound like a request, Aerith,” he shook his head, not liking how hopeless that had sounded.
“I was getting there,” she swatted playfully at him, “Don’t be so impatient. Do you really think I came here to tell you how lost and lonely you are? As if.” She put her hands on her hips and glared at him. “I want you to go back and make it right for you and for them. Find them. Change the way things happened. Keep them alive and sane.”
“Go…back?” Cloud stared at her, dumbfounded, “That’s possible?” An image of Zack Fair’s smiling face flashed before his eyes. Cloud blinked against the sudden sting of unshed tears. To see Zack again… To live in a world where he hadn’t been killed… where Cloud was finally strong enough to save them both.
“It’s possible this once, but only if you consent.” Aerith held up a hand as he opened his mouth agree, “You haven’t heard the downside yet.” Serious green eyes stared intently into his, “If you do this you’ll never be able to come back. You will live out the rest of your life in the new future you create – you as you are now and your younger self. If you are killed there, that’s it. No more chances. Don’t answer me now. Think about it carefully. If you want to go for it, meet me at the church.” She leaned forward and planted a kiss squarely on his forehead.
---
He slowed the bike as soon as the tires hit pavement instead of packed earth. It wouldn’t do to take out innocent pedestrians just because he wasn’t paying attention. Still, if the streets hadn’t been crowded, he could have driven back to the house with his eyes closed.
Somewhere near the center of town, he found himself turning off on a side road instead. Almost without conscious thought on his part, the church appeared ahead of him. It had been too long since his last visit. Cloud parked the bike out front and walked in. It looked the same as it always did. He smiled.
The dream the night before had unsettled him. He had a hard time separating Aerith’s actual visits from things his mind made up on its own. Being given the chance to fix everything seemed like it must be the latter. It was too much to hope for.
“Aerith?” He called out anyway. Silence greeted him. Cloud sighed, picking his way over the tumbled stone to the edge of the small pond that still took up the back half of the church. Sunlight sparkled on the water. “I’ll go.” Cloud spoke softly. “If there’s any way that last night was more than a dream, I’ll do it.” He ran his hands over his face.
Something moved behind him and he whirled around. The stone under his foot gave out as he twisted and he plunged into the water. A current that he was sure hadn’t been there before tugged at him from below. He thrashed, fighting against it. His head struck the rock at the edge of the pond. His vision blurred and his ears rang.
Disoriented, he stopped fighting. The water closed over his head. He tasted blood and wondered vaguely just how hard he’d hit his head. He was dizzy, though from lack of oxygen or the head wound he wasn’t sure. The light above him was fading as he was pulled deeper. He struggled weakly and finally went still. His lungs were burning and he was losing the fight to stay conscious. He opened his mouth, unable to keep from gasping for air.
Everything stopped. He was floating, but he could breathe. He was no longer wet and the pain in his head faded into the background. The pale green ribbons of the Lifestream wrapped around him, tingling where they brushed against his skin. He reached out, no longer afraid. If this was death, no wonder Aerith never complained.
Just as he was getting comfortable, the world slammed back into being with the force of a runaway train. Cloud coughed and spat out a mouthful of blood. He was laying on something cold and dry. He rolled onto his back, wheezing as he tried to recover from being hit in the head and well and thoroughly drowned. He cracked his eyes open for a moment before clenching them shut against the harsh, artificial lighting. Maybe he’d just lie here a few minutes longer. His head spun dizzily even with his eyes shut. He felt unconsciousness looming and knew this time there wasn’t a damn thing he could do about it.
--
Angeal had tried not to watch the clock. Really tried. And yet, he had seen the little green numbers turn over every hour between 2200 and 0200. So much for getting some extra sleep. Genesis would laugh his head off if he were here after all of the crap he had given Angeal about getting old and going to bed so early. Zack would probably just suggest that the time would have been better spent at a club or pranking one of the other senior officers. It was a moot point since both of them were most likely sleeping soundly in their own beds while he was wrestling with insomnia.
He picked up the phone, half tempted to call Sephiroth. Angeal was nearly convinced that he never slept. Still, on the off chance the other man was actually getting some rest, Angeal didn’t want to be the one to interrupt it. His friend had been looking tired lately, though Gaea knew it hadn’t slowed his reflexes any. The bruises he’d picked up from their sparring session earlier had proven that.
Getting up and throwing on his last clean uniform, Angeal headed out to prowl the halls. It was way past curfew for the cadets who weren’t on guard duty and everything was quiet. He took the stairs down three floors to the training center with a half-formed idea of beating the shit out of some training programs until he got tired enough to try sleeping again.
Much to his surprise, a light was on in one of the training rooms. He shook his head, smiling slightly. He’d be interested to see which of the cadets was putting in a few extra hours. He’d chew them out for getting caught after curfew, of course, but it was always good to know who cared enough to lose sleep over practice time.
Stifling his grin, the first class Soldier stepped into the doorway with his best stern and commanding look on. He stopped, unprepared for the sight of a vaguely familiar looking young man lying flat out on the floor. Perhaps a drunken escapade then? Angeal was significantly less amused by that possibility. Drunken cadets who couldn’t even make it back to their bunks weren’t something he wanted to deal with at two o’clock in the morning.
A sharp coppery scent caught his attention a second before he opened his mouth to bellow at the boy to get up. He looked more carefully at the cadet. Blood stained the too-pale lips and trickled down one fair-skinned cheek. In a moment, Angeal was kneeling next to the boy. He picked up a slender wrist, checking for a pulse. He sighed in relief when he found it there and steady. Outside of the pallor and bloody lip, the boy seemed fine – if still unconscious.
Blue eyes fluttered open and Angeal sat back in surprise as mako light shown out from under long eyelashes. He would have sworn he knew all the Soldiers who had recently gotten mako treatments. This one was definitely young enough that he should have seen him in class or training. Not to mention the boy was more than pretty enough to stick in anyone’s memory. He couldn’t imagine how he’d made it as a Soldier and why Angeal hadn’t heard about it.
The boy was small for a Soldier. He was built lighter than even Genesis and Gen had certainly had his fair share of trouble developing the strength necessary to keep up with himself and Sephiroth. Small and pretty wasn’t a good combination around here. At the cadet level, the teasing was endless and the hazing worse. Gen had been lucky in that he was strong enough to wipe the floor with anyone who pushed it too far. And Angeal had always watched his back for him.
The boy couldn’t be Soldier. He must have been exposed to mako some other way. Which still didn’t explain what he was doing in the training center of ShinRa Co. in the middle of the night.
“Z-Zack?” Angeal nearly missed it, the young man’s voice was so soft and he’d been so busy staring.
“No,” he answered, wondering how Zack had managed to make friends without Angeal hearing about it. Not that he’d been stalking his protégé. He didn’t need to. Until now he would have said that Zack told him absolutely everything and then some.
The reaction to Angeal’s voice was unexpected and immediate. The young man rolled to his feet so quickly that Angeal found himself re-thinking his decision that the boy wasn’t Soldier. He didn’t go for any weapons – he didn’t have any on him that Angeal could see – but his posture was balanced and defensive. It wasn’t quite suited for hand-to-hand but if the young man had had a sword it would have made perfect sense.
“Who are you?” the young man’s voice wasn’t soft any longer. It was still quiet but there was a hard, wary edge that made Angeal tack a few years on to his estimate of the young man’s age. He studied the boy more closely. The blue eyes didn’t seem to be focusing well which would explain why he’d mistaken Angeal for Zack at first.
“Angeal. And you are?” Angeal didn’t like feeling off balance and the entire situation wasn’t adding up at all. As soon as he got the boy to stand down, he was calling Zack, beauty sleep be damned.
“Commander Hewley? I-I’d forgotten…” Some of the tension left the boy’s body and he swayed slightly. Angeal stepped forward in time to catch him as he stumbled. He weighed more than Angeal expected.
“What’s your name, kid?” he asked again, trying to keep his voice gentle. This kept getting stranger and stranger.
“Cloud. Cloud Strife.” Eyes closed and the young man’s head fell forward onto Angeal’s shoulder. Scooping him up, Angeal headed out the door. Infirmary first then a chat with his protégé. There were questions that needed answering.
--
“Perhaps I’m mistaken but isn’t one’s date supposed to be conscious for the dragging them back to your room part?” The familiar deep voice drawled the words mockingly.
Angeal groaned as he caught the undercurrent of amusement in his friend’s harsh tone. It was a hell of a time for Sephiroth's sense of humor to rear its very rare head. “Found him unconscious in Training Room 3,” he answered shortly, “He said his name was Cloud Strife and mentioned Zack.”
“He said all of that while unconscious?” One silver eyebrow arched haughtily, “Truly a catch.” Angeal resisted the urge to groan again. Dealing with Seph in a mood was almost worse than when Genesis went off on a tear. Almost.
“Obviously not,” he sent a sharp look in Sephiroth’s direction. Cloud twitched in Angeal’s arms, sighing softly and turning his face into the man’s chest. In spite of himself, Angeal tightened his arms protectively. Sephiroth’s eyes narrowed and he reached forward, brushing a lock of blond hair back from Cloud’s temple. A dark bruise was blooming on the pale skin.
“Cadet hazing?” the tone in the silver-haired man’s voice was cold. Angeal knew full well that Sephiroth had never suffered from the kind of attention that involved being pushed around by one’s peers. The man had been entirely too intimidating for that for at least as long as Angeal had known him. Still, the General didn’t approve of Soldier trainees wasting time on trivial matters. Though thinking about it, Angeal was fairly sure he didn’t approve of trainees who let themselves be pushed around either.
“I don’t know. I don’t think so. I was hoping the infirmary could tell me more. He wasn’t conscious for very long. He’s been exposed to mako somehow or other, but I don’t recognize him.”
“He’s too small for Soldier,” Sephiroth answered, studying Cloud with renewed interest. He’d never bothered to keep track of any but the first class Soldiers. Angeal, on the other hand, knew most of them. If he said the boy wasn’t Soldier, then he likely wasn’t. “Let me know what they have to say.” Conversation finished as far as he was concerned, Sephiroth turned and continued down the hall.
Angeal sighed and started walking in the direction of the infirmary again. Seph was in a strange mood and it wasn’t the first time lately. He and Genesis both had been short-fused and more mercurial than usual. Juggling Cloud and keying his way through the infirmary door, Angeal wondered if he’d missed something. Maybe they’d had another fight.
His thoughts were interrupted by the medic and the next several minutes were spent arranging Cloud on the exam table and attaching various diagnostic machines. Angeal watched out of the corner of his eye as the scanner identified the patient and brought up his Shinra record on one of the computer screens:
CLOUD STRIFE
BRANCH: INFANTRY
AGE: 16
STATUS: ACTIVE
An infantry grunt? Angeal supposed that explained the defensive reaction in the training center as well as where he might have met Zack. Zack talked to everyone and anyone around. Sixteen seemed young to have developed that kind of musculature but the picture matched the young man lying on the table. Something seemed slightly off about it, but Angeal doubted there were two men who looked like that running around Shinra. Someone definitely would have noticed if there had been. Too pretty by half.
Pulling out his phone, he hit the speed dial for Zack’s number and took a few steps away from the medic.
“Wa? Hm? ” Angeal’s lips twitched as a very sleepy Zack answered the phone.
“Do you know an infantryman by the name of Cloud Strife?” Angeal asked without preamble.
“Angeal?” Consciousness was starting to work its way into Zack’s voice.
“Who else?”
“It’s three AM, man. Is this important?”
Angeal waited a few moments without speaking. He checked his watch. Three, two, one…
“Sorry. Didn’t mean that. Of course it’s important if you’re calling.”
“Strife, Puppy.” Angeal reminded him. The kid had the attention span of a goldfish sometimes.
“Uh. Doesn’t ring any bells.”
“Why don’t you come down to the infirmary and see if his face does. He seems to know you.” If Zack had seen Cloud before, Angeal was fairly sure he’d remember. Zack never forgot a pretty face regardless of gender and Cloud seemed like just his type. Angeal really hoped he wasn’t about to be treated to the fallout of some drunken fling or other that his student had gotten himself into. People seemed to fall for Zack without Zack even noticing.
“Seriously?” Zack groaned but didn’t wait for an answer, “Yeah, yeah. I know. You wouldn’t ask otherwise. Be down in a few.”
Angeal hung up and found a chair. This had the potential to be more interesting than anything should be in the wee hours of the morning with no sleep.