Archive of Our Own

Light of the morning sun slipped past the blinds, its golden hue illuminating brawny skin. Contouring every line on his body, his ribs and scars alike. They were like strands of silver, adorning his tawny skin delicately. Every stroke of a knife told a different story forever printed on the flesh it had carved.

His form melted into the sheets that had barely covered his bare body. As the light hit his eyelids, they twitched open. They opened to a wonderful sight, next to him was his boyfriend. He was like the finest of Greek statues made of marble. His skin was as porcelain made of moonlight. Even as the golden warmth cascaded over him as horizontal lines of light, he was still of that pale color. Although it made it seem as if golden lines were on his inner thighs and arms. Scattered about to tell a story of the past where perfection was sought but could never be found.

Eddy was gold adorned in silver and Brett was silver adorned in gold. Together they were intertwined together. One without the other could never be complete. They were one half of a whole. Neither violinists were stuck in the unhealthy cycle of codependency, they simply felt more complete when knowing they had someone to wake up for. They had someone to breathe for.

From the bed a shaky hand lifted. Eddy reached out to his sleeping lover, cupping his cheek as if to make sure he was still there. Still there alive. Still there breathing. Still with him.  Carefully he stroked over the smooth skin, sometimes he couldn’t believe that Brett was real. That Brett was by his side, that Brett chose him. Brett didn’t have to stay here in this cruel life but he chose to stay. Chose to suffer in a world where people didn’t care for people like them, but chose it all to be by Eddy’s side. If one day he chose to leave, Eddy would bid him farewell with a heavy heart but would understand the need.

Eddy himself was fully aware of the choices he had to face: To stay or to go, to live or to die. Some days he woke up and wanted to cease to exist yet he still kept breathing for Brett, the one he loved. Every morning he would wake up and tell himself,  “It’s worth it if I choose to stay.”

In this moment he was happy to be here even if to live was to suffer, was to struggle and fight to exist. All in the end to lay here across from Brett and stroking his cheek was all worth it.

Brett’s eyes soon fluttered open, “Good mornin’ , love.”

He spoke through a yawn. His whole face scrunching up adorably as he did, “How long have you been awake?”

“Not too long, just for a few minutes, “ A lazy smile pulled at the corner of his lips, “Long enough to admire you though.”

He loved how subtle pink tones dusted over the other violinist’s cheeks. He was so, so beautiful.

A pout found its way to Brett’s soft pink lips, “No fair, I wanted to get to admire your peaceful sleeping face. Ah maybe next time.”

The pout was replaced by a smile, his eyes squinted as the corners of his lips raised. Eddy couldn’t help but kiss the edge of that lovely smile. Brett wanting proper kisses pressed his lips against Eddy’s chapped ones, that had been chewed way too often. Eddy by nature was a biter or a chewer. When anxious he often would gnaw on his lips or chew the inside of his cheeks. If it was really bad he would turn to chewing the sides of his fingers. It was one of the many forms of how his anxiety clawed its way out from his heart through his ribcage. Clawing, biting, pulling, anything it could do to be released.
The rough feelings of tears didn’t deter Brett from kissing Eddy though, only solidified his choice to buy a silicone ring designed to chew. They didn’t do everything perfectly but they always cared for one another no matter what it looked like. No matter how they felt or if they argued,  they were always there to pick up the pieces. 

Brett pulled back after a few seconds of a soft chaste kiss. This was all he could ever ask for, “I love you Eddy.”

He spoke as if they were the only words he cared to know. The weight of them had never stopped being felt by Eddy. Eddy found himself shyly giggling, covering his face with his hands, “I love you too.”

It wasn’t that they had recently gotten together nor was it uncommon for them to share their love. Simply Eddy had never left the state of awe Brett put him in. Brett was here and loved him. Every time it felt like a new revelation being written on his heart.

“Let me see your face cutie, please,” Brett took Eddy’s hands into his own, but didn’t dare move them. He would never take a choice away from Eddy, like so many had. So he wouldn’t move Eddy’s hands, only hold them if Eddy decided to keep them there or move them. Eddy peeked from between his fingers, seeing Brett’s precious smile. Seeing Brett’s features graced with a genuine smile was something so precious. Eddy was so lucky to see it. He lowered his hands to see better. A blush sprinkled his cheeks.

“You’re so fucking cute, “ Brett’s smile grew bigger as he laughed warmly. Eddy can feel his whole body fill with warmth from something as simple as Brett’s laughter. Without thought he joined in with the harmonious sound, interlacing their fingers as he did. Moments like these felt like all the thorns in his life were being uprooted. 

In an instance Brett rolled on top of Eddy, pressing tiny little kisses all over his face. So freaking precious he thought. Eddy’s laughter turned into small giggles, loving the feeling to be peppered in kisses. He felt so loved. When a kiss landed on the tip of his nose it scrunched up.
“Hmm, I hate to interrupt this but let’s eat some breakfast, yeah?” Brett propped himself up onto his elbows. He knew Eddy’s rocky history with food, the pain that came with it. If humans could survive without it, Brett wouldn’t make his boyfriend because he hated seeing that pain. Alas it was a necessity of life and he wouldn’t stand by to watch him slip away bit by bit. As a friend and as a boyfriend it was his job to help Eddy stay healthy and to support him through a hard time.

Eddy smiled softly at Brett, he didn’t want to worry him, “Breakfast is good. Is it okay if it’s something light?”

He had been doing fairly well when it came to forcing himself to eat, mentally though he felt as if he were in the same place. Eddy was doing the best he could all for Brett, this was for Brett not himself.
“We can eat something light, how about peanut butter toast or maybe just eggs?” Brett offered, he knew these things took time and that he couldn’t just make Eddy eat a super big breakfast. That would end with it all coming up in the end, which was counterproductive.

“Eggs sound good, “ Eddy nodded to that, he decided protein was better to have than bread. Plus if Brett made toast for himself he could take little bites of it without feeling too bad about himself. The feeling of food burnt his throat, made his stomach thrash and made it so the acid bubbled wanting to escape the prison of his esophagus. All of this pain was for Brett. So he could keep living to be by his side. Even if that meant he was clawing his way through life. Weren’t they all doing that anyways.

“Eggs it is then. I’m proud of you,” Brett spoke softly, he knew very well that mental health wasn’t about stepping forward or back. It was more like walking through a maze until you made it out or inevitably gave up. Sometimes they would come to a dead end, feeling like quitting so staying there a little bit then begin looking for the way out again. It wasn’t black and white. That was why Brett would whisper his praises, because no matter where Eddy was in that maze he was still further than he was at the start. That in itself was something to be proud of. The assurance did way better than a hard scolding that some would give. Any progress was progress in his eyes.
“For what?” Eddy looked at him with the utmost confusion, what was there to be proud of? 

“I’m proud of you eating for me even though it pains you, I’m proud that you have chosen to still breathe although it’s hard, I’m proud to be your boyfriend. I love you so much,” Brett spoke softly. There was an importance in validating one’s partner despite their struggle, rather than tearing them down for not being okay. Once Brett had found himself closeted and in a relationship with an older man whilst he was still in highschool. When caught self harming as punishment he would only be punished more with cruel cutting words. That was far worse than the knife, it stuck to him and cut deeper than he ever could. It felt like he couldn’t escape because where could he go to, who could he tell!? Then he met Eddy, the sweetest boy in math tutoring. A boy who was just like him. 

Brett knew they both had similar experiences in life and it manifested in different ways. What mattered though was that they were together now to build each other up when others tried to tear them down.

Eddy found himself hugging Brett, tears threatening to spill out, “I’m proud to be your boyfriend too.”

He buried his face into the soft skin of Brett’s shoulder whilst Brett gently hugged him back. Petting him ever so gently. He pulled his boyfriend into his arms then got up to carry him to the kitchen. He knew that Eddy loved when he manhandled him. Brett loved it too. Loved being able to manhandle him but loved when Eddy manhandled him too. One arm settled under Eddy’s  thighs as the other hand rested on his back, rubbing up and down his spine, “I love you Eddy. I love you so much.”

Eddy sniffled softly as he clung to Brett more, just to make sure he wouldn’t fall, “I love you too Brett. So, so much.”

The younger violinist whispered softly, he was just so happy to be with Brett. This resulted in the slightly older man to smile, ever so softly. The affection in his boyfriend’s voice was so tangible, it made his heart swell and tremble. All he ever wanted was to be loved, what a privilege it was to love and to be loved. Not everyone had an Eddy in their life but Brett did, it was a great honor that Eddy had chosen him. He always reminded himself of that: This was special. 

Once in the kitchen, he set Eddy on the kitchen counter, Brett reaching up to stroke his cheek, “Thank you for doing your best for me. That’s all I could ever ask from you.” 

Like a cat or maybe a puppy, Eddy didn’t hesitate to nuzzle into the hand that showed him such kindness. Brett simply smiled at the motion, gently using his thumb to rub over the bumpy skin. It wasn’t smooth nor was it flawless but it was Eddy. Purely Eddy. Brett loved that.

“Thank you too, Bretty. You always give me your best,” Eddy closed his eyes as he melted into the feeling of human warmth. This was all he ever wanted: A bond with another person. Someone to understand him and to love him. Someone to live for. Eddy knew it wasn’t necessarily healthy to rely on another person's existence to exist himself, but Brett made living easier. Made him want to wake up every morning so he could see Brett’s beautiful face across from his own. Everything that had happened, everything he had gone through became worth it in those moments. All of it was worth it to simply see Brett.

Brett simply smiled, bright and warm, a look rare for his face, “My pleasure. Anyways, I think I should start cooking or I’ll never step away from you.”
Alas he had to step away from his cute puppy.  It was his job to make sure Eddy ate and took his medication. Both were a struggle some day, but Brett would never allow himself to be frustrated by that. Everyone healed at their own pace, it wasn’t his job to force Eddy to heal like he thought he should. Brett knew the feeling all too well of someone trying to force him to be better, to heal. In actuality it just made his mentality worse, his will to survive weakened. Brett would never do that to Eddy.

_____

“What are these marks on your arms!? Huh?” A bruising grip took a strong hold of his bicep, nails digging into the cuts made days prior. What had once scabbed over was made to bleed out.
Brett tried to wrench himself away but the grip only grew tighter, “It’s nothing, let go!”

He was smaller than the larger, older man. He didn’t have a chance of escape.

“Don’t make me send you back to the mental facility because you chose to lie. What happened Brett?” The low sound of his boyfriend's voice sounded like a threat to his ears. He froze, eyes widening. He couldn’t go back there. No no no!

“I’m sorry, I won’t do it again! I was just stressed about exams and how I wasn’t scoring enough. I’m sorry, please just don’t send me back there!” He rambled in pure panic. 

________

“Smooth like Butter!” Eddy’s singing brought Brett out of his suffocating memories. What was he doing? Oh, making eggs. Apparently he had gotten pretty far without thought or notice.

“Eddy, why do you have a butcher knife to cut butter?” Brett raised an eyebrow, taking in the sight of his boyfriend with a comically big knife compared to the little slice of butter that he had on the side of the blade.

“It was the closest one to me,” Eddy smiled shyly, “It’s for the eggs, to help them fry. Everything tastes good with butter.”
Brett chuckled warmly, finding Eddy absolutely adorable, “Okay then, puppy. Why don’t you put it in the frying pan? I like myself some butter too.”

Eddy smiled back at Brett as he plopped the butter in, he liked how it sizzled. Making the right side up egg’s white turn crispy. He thought that was one of the best parts when he could actually enjoy himself.
Brett watched Eddy, “You know what would have been good?”

“What?’ Eddy turned his attention from the sizzling, drawing his eyes back to the dazzling man in front of him.
Brett loved how he could get Eddy’s attention, he didn’t even have to do anything grand to gain it. Eddy always had eyes for Brett, ever since they first met. His eyes had always been for him, “Well, I was thinking I should have steamed rice, instead of suggesting toast. I know you love rice.”
Brett wondered if there was still time to steam some, he recognized the shy twinkle in Eddy’s eyes. He knew it was due to Eddy really liking rice but also wasn’t sure if he should eat it or if he was allowed too.
“You know what, let’s put some on Eddy, just the quick one minute rice. We can have it with breakfast. You deserve to eat and enjoy it. Scratch the toast. Eggs and rice are good.” Brett wanted the best for Eddy, no matter what. Even if that meant he was changing his cooking plans. He didn’t really mind though. If it was something Eddy actually liked to eat and was willing to eat then that was a good choice.  

“Okay I can do that,” Eddy jumped off the counter top, he was excited for rice. It was good with eggs too. 

He swayed over and grabbed the rice to boil instead of putting it into the rice cooker. It was one minute rice after all. Not as good but it was a sacrifice he was willing to make so as to not have cold eggs. Plus it wasn’t even that bad, at worse it was a bit soggy or mushy because of being in water too long. That was easily avoidable. Plus Eddy could cook on the stove top. He just didn’t know how to use the oven part or bake. Someday he would learn to surprise Brett.

Once the eggs and rice were done they took a seat at the table to eat together.  Eddy flopped himself into Brett’s lap, careful not to crush his exposed dick, only obstructing his view. It worried Brett most of the time how light his boyfriend felt in his lap. He never brought that up though, knowing full well it may be taken as an encouragement or trigger a bad episode. That was something Brett never intended to do. Even if he knew it would happen sometimes. He always did his best to avoid it.

“Do you want me to feed you, love?” Brett said instead of voicing his worries.

“Yes please,” Eddy blushed whilst leaning his head on Brett’s shoulder, “I can feed you too if you’d like. I would like to at least.”

Brett smiled softly, “You’re too sweet. Of course you can feed me.”

He loved that Eddy wanted to do that for him. Eddy was his sweet angel, always trying to care for him too.

“Well I love you, so I want to treat every moment I have as a chance to show you that I do,” Delicately Eddy picked up his chopsticks. He dragged the tips of them over the yolk of the egg, letting it break and spill over the rice. Yolk spilled over the rice, painting it yellow. Slowly Eddy mixed it in before scooping it up with the chopsticks, “Bretty, say aaaa.”

Brett couldn’t help but snort, “Aaaaa.”

He opened his mouth up wide, honestly, he wasn’t sure how he ended up being fed first. He couldn’t complain though because Eddy was so cute.

Eddy giggled with a grin, liking how Brett did as he asked.

“So precious and pretty,” Eddy murmured, watching how Brett’s lips wrapped around the chopsticks to get all the rice. His lips were so pretty and pink, Eddy found himself thinking. They would also be much better connected to his lips or wrapped around something else. He supposed they should get through breakfast first. 

Bret hummed softly in reply before releasing the utensils, “Thanks now let me feed you too.”

He quickly kissed Eddy’s cheek. The older violinist was far from graceful. Unlike Eddy, Brett stabbed the eggs with his chopsticks then stirred it all together. It all tasted the same anyway. So what if he stabbed it? Plus stabbing things was way more fun. 

“I guess I can let you, I really love rice,” Eddy rested against Brett, trying to relax himself. Breakfast always felt more stressful than what he should. Really he was thankful that he had Brett to help calm him down. Having Brett meant he wouldn’t cry from the disappointment of food.

“Thank you for letting me,” Brett offered up some food, feeling lucky that he was the one who got to hold and assure Eddy. No one else got the opportunity, only he was trusted with the duality. Teetering on the fragility of humanity and the strength of resilience. What a beautiful yet horrifying thing, never knowing what the result would be. For now, Eddy accepting nutrients into his body was a win. Showing his resilience towards the circumstances.

Eddy looked at him with such a soft look, only the purest of affections in his eyes, “You’re welcome I think.”

The younger wasn’t sure if he should really be thanked for this. He wouldn’t invalidate what Brett felt thankful for. That would be crappy of him.

For a brief second their lips met, before parting again, “How about we finish eating and I show you how thankful I am for you.”

Brett purred, after all them both doing better should be rewarded. If Eddy wanted that, that was. Which he did. Eddy blushed and nodded, “Yes please.”

——-

Eddy covered his torso with a blanket that they always hung on the back of the couch, but Brett didn’t ask or demand it to be removed. If it was what made Eddy feel comfortable in the moment then so be it.

Instead his lips pressed against warm skin. Rather than uttering any sound he kissed his way up the beautiful thighs he was between. Being on the couch there wasn’t much room but it was the perfect amount of space for Brett. He laid on his stomach between Eddy’s legs, nestling himself close.

When he came to a place he particularly liked he sucked a mark into it, reveling in the small gasp that escaped his boyfriend.

“You’re so good, my good boy,” Brett purred, rubbing his cheek lightly against the man. 

Eddy’s face turned a deep red from the simple comment, “Am I good?”

He asked in such a small voice it immediately caught Brett’s attention, “You are good, Eddy. So good.”

Eddy turned even more red if that was even possible, “Thank you, that makes me really happy. I just want to be good for you.”

“I know baby and you are,” Brett purred whilst pushing himself up on his elbows to get a better look at his lover. He was so adorable in Brett’s eyes, no one could convince him differently,  “You’re so precious.”

“Ah, you’re making me feel so shy,” Eddy giggled, throwing an arm over his eyes. Brett smiled warmly as he watched him, huh, cute.

Brett hummed in appreciation before responding, “I can make you feel even more shy, would you like that.”
Brett shifted his weight so he could loosely wrap his fingers around the base of Eddy’s dick. The little fella had already stirred in interest. 

Eddy jolted in shock then mewled softly, “Yes please.” 

It was always good to use his manners if he wanted something. Right now he wanted his dick to get some attention.  

Brett smirked, looking down at Eddy, “Don’t mind if I do then.”

He pumped his hand up and down, he kept his fingers loose to give pressure but not enough, making it more teasing than anything.

“Aah Brett, no fair,” Eddy all but squealed, he jerked his hips so as to get some sort of friction, “Please.”

“Since you asked so nicely,” Brett’s fingers tightened, giving the base a firm squeeze, “Like this, baby?”

Eddy gasped, “Oh fuck, just like that!”

Before he could buck his hips, Brett sat up to use his free hand to pin them to the couch. He would love to just let Eddy enjoy himself but he couldn’t have Eddy cum just yet.

“Be a good boy and let me know when you’re about to cum, and try to stay still if you can,” Brett smiled ever so softly as he looked down at him with a soft gaze.

Once Eddy nodded Brett removed his free hand from Eddy’s hip to grab the lube. He popped the lid open with one hand.  Hopefully the handjob would put Eddy in enough pleasure that the preparation wouldn’t bring any discomfort.

With each drag of Brett’s hand, Eddy couldn’t help but mewl. His body trembled underneath the touch yet he tried to make himself still. There was a need for him to be good. If he wasn’t good then what was he? Was he even worth it if he wasn’t?! So he had to be still! If he wasn’t then he was absolutely worthless. As if sensing his boyfriend's unpleasant thoughts, Brett stilled his hands. Insecurities and fears were uncontrollable but Brett was here to ease them.

“Love it’s okay,” Brett realized that he phrased it wrong, or that Eddy wasn’t in the mental space to not take it badly, “You’re my good boy if you move, cum or not. Enjoy yourself baby, it’s okay.”
He purred softly, they were both sick, not physically but mentally. He knew that sometimes he would trigger something for Eddy or Eddy would trigger something for him. It was a part of their life and he would take responsibility if it happened because it could never be 100% avoided.

“Is it really okay?” Eddy asked softly as he looked at Brett, his anxiety could clearly be seen. Brett gave a reassuring smile before he went on to speak, “It’s okay Eddy. Enjoy yourself however you want. You’re so good.”
No lie was detected in his tone. Eddy immediately eased when seeing that Brett meant every word he spoke. 
“Thank you, I love you,” Eddy spoke quietly but didn’t break eye contact. All Brett could see in them now was Eddy’s love for him, all signs of anxiety dispersing.

Brett couldn’t help but lean down and kiss his soft red lips. Lightly he nipped at the plush bottom one, feeling how Eddy immediately parted his lips for him. Without thought he slipped his tongue into the wet cavern. With his boyfriend now thoroughly distracted he started to pump his hand up and down his length. Eddy was about average sized but had a really thick base which Brett in fact liked. Brett himself was well endowed, which he also liked. Although he definitely would give up some of his penis length to be a few cm taller. Alas he couldn’t make that trade, not to mention Eddy liked him spoon-able and blessed down there. All in all, it was a win win.

Eddy moaned into Brett’s mouth, bucking his hips up so he could have more friction. Brett pulled back, only a strand of saliva connecting their lips. Brett had to admit that he liked this sight better; Eddy panting underneath him while basically fucking Brett’s delicate hand. Carefully Brett reached down to get the abandoned lube. Seeing as he only had one hand all he could do was directly squirt the lube directly on Eddy’s opening. His hips stilled for a quick moment because he squeaked loudly, “Fuck that’s cold!”

“Sorry, love. My hands are a bit occupied,” Brett chuckled softly, swiping his thumb over the tip, pressing his thumb against the slit, reveling in the moans Eddy let escape, “I’ll warm it up for you, baby.”

He discarded the lube bottle, pressing his fingers to the vulnerable spot. Gently he rubbed the lube in, pressing his finger against the opening, feeling how the muscle wanted to give in under the soft pressure. Eddy mewled softly, stilling his hips ever so slightly as to not get himself hurt. 

Brett dragged his finger around the rim  in circular motions, pressing against the center as he did before. The purpose of this was to have Eddy properly relax so he wouldn’t end up hurting his boyfriend. Finally he pushed a finger into the first knuckle.

Eddy keened, having Brett’s finger pushing into him and his hand squeezing his dick made him want to push over the edge, “Oooh oh.”

He whimpered, jerking his hips to push down on Brett’s finger. Brett let him, holding his own hand still to stay consistent with being injury free. Not to mention it was hot watching his boyfriend trying to fuck himself on his finger. Eddy was always so reactive, not to mention vocal. Brett loved that so much, his moans were music to his ears, “You’re so good.”

The man under him preened deeply receptive to praise, a soft blush dusting his cheeks, “Please Brett…”

“Please what, baby?” Brett purred, finding Eddy adorable above all things. He wanted to get more cute reactions from him.

“More?” Eddy looked at him with his wide almond eyes, hoping Brett understood what he was saying. So cute. Brett understood that Eddy either meant more fingers or dick action. Although he felt it was more likely that Eddy was asking for fingers.

Brett purred softly, “You know I can’t deny you, baby.”

He uncurled his hand from Eddy’s cock, which caused a whine. Brett needed to hold Eddy’s hip though, “I’m sorry baby, you’ll be able to move again once I get my other finger in you.”

The man underneath him simply pouted but nodded. 

“You’re oh so precious,” Brett, purred, gently rubbing his second finger over his rim like he had done the first time. When he felt Eddy opening up underneath him, he pressed his index finger in along the side of his middle finger, “There we go.”

Eddy rumbled softly with a moan, Brett let go of his hip now wanting to allow him to enjoy himself. Eddy gasped softly, so ready to  just push himself down against Brett’s fingers. His hips moved up and down, Brett watched in amazement watching as his boyfriend moved in slow sensual waves. All he felt was love and wonder for his boyfriend. They were breaking their chains of shame to be together.

“Wow baby, just like that,” Brett couldn’t take his eyes off of how his fingers disappeared into Eddy over and over again. It was probably one of the hottest things he had seen in his entire lifetime. 

Eddy’s breath caught as he began to whimper, “Fuck, Brett-,” he ground down with a choke, “I need you.”

Without pause he kept rocking his hips, pretty much doing all the work. Brett was filled with adoration, he was ready to adorn his love in kisses and everything that was purely of Brett. He wanted Eddy to remember who he belonged to. Remember that he wasn’t alone and that he would always love him.
Brett surged forward, showering Eddy’s neck in kisses, seeing as Eddy hid his torso. He growled against his lovers jugular, digging his teeth into the soft skin whilst spreading his fingers apart to spread Eddy wide, “I need you too Eddy, fuck, so much.” 

 Eddy bucked his hips with a pleasured wail, the stretch faintly burned but it was more pleasure than anything
“I would love just to keep my cock in you all day,” Brett’s town was low and gravelly, seeing Eddy whither underneath him was such a turn on.

“Oh, please, please! I want your cock,” Eddy whimpered, chest heaving up and down. It was almost hard to breathe with how much he wanted that. Carefully Brett pulled his fingers out of his boyfriend, “Then you can have it, love. Have all of me.”
He took himself into his hand, lining himself up with his opening.

“I want you Brett, all the good and bad. Give it to me,” Eddy let go of the blanket to wrap his arms around the smaller man, “I always want you. I want everything.”
His voice was shaky with pleasure. Never in Brett’s life had he felt more accepted than he had with Eddy. Tears wanted to brim from his eyes just from the pure bliss of acceptance. Not everyone was as lucky as him, not everyone had found a love that was so unconditional. He wished everyone could have an Eddy in their life, but he was also glad that he didn’t Have to share.

Finally, finally he pushed in as the tears finally spilled from his eyes, “I love you, I love you so much. I’m so lucky to have you.”
Brett bowed his head, pressing his forehead against Eddy’s chest, even as he fully sheathed himself. Eddy may be gasping but he wasn’t distracted enough to not hug Brett. His strong arms stayed wrapped around the smaller man, squeezing him lightly.
Those three precious words stumbled from his lips, “I love you too Brett, so much.”
He petted his hair and back, his hands pressing against every inch of Brett just to let him know he was there, “I love you more than you could ever hate yourself. I love you more than that.”

That moment Brett broke more, wretched sobs ripped through his throat. It was no mystery that they despised themselves. Sometimes Brett's hate was more hidden than Eddy’s own. Eddy was an open book, wore his emotions on his sleeve, but Brett hid it all under the face of being okay. Not here though. In these moments he was simply broken yet safe in the embrace of a man who meant the world to him. Eddy loved him more than he could ever hate himself. To have that much love given was absolutely amazing, “Thank you, Eddy.”

Eddy rolled them over, mounting Brett’s hip, still keeping his dick buried deep in him, “You don’t need to thank me, you don’t even need to think right now. Just enjoy,”
By flipping them Brett could see Eddy in all his glory, the blanket falling off his body, “Focus on me and my love for you.”
Eddy leaned back as he took Brett’s hands, placing them on his hips. He wanted him to feel the way he moved. Carefully Eddy wiped Brett’s stray tears before he lifted his hips then lowered them. A groan crawled its way out of Brett’s throat. He couldn’t keep his eyes off of Eddy.

Eddy rested the palm of his hand on Brett’s chest over his heart, stroking his thumb over it, “Hmm how does it feel?”

He wanted Brett to truly enjoy himself, to take all of his sadness and fill the emptiness.

Brett could see how Eddy’s stomach tightened with each roll of his hips. He could tell that he was brushing up against Eddy’s prostate with how he tightened around him. The younger’s precum already dripped onto Brett’s soft stomach, “You’re so warm inside and tight Eddy. So good.”

Brett gently squeezed his hips, lifting him gently and angling himself to hit his prostate better. Eddy lightly scratched Brett’s chest with a hum, bouncing up and down allowing himself to feel the new angle, “You’re so good, filling me so deep and  stretching me so good.”
He moaned, throwing his head back, giving a good view of his neck.

Brett let his jaw go slack, allowing his moans to fall out. Brett couldn’t take his eyes off of Eddy, his eyes raked over him, admiring everything about him. His hands trailed from Eddy’s hips to Eddy’s ass, grabbing each cheek to squeeze. Eddy gasped at that, he loved the way Brett grabbed him. He loved how Brett’s tears all but disappeared, the man’s face now lost in pleasure. His thoughts soon being pushed out as his dick was pushed deeper into his boyfriend.

“Fill me up, Babe. Let it all out,” Eddy picked his pace up, wanting him deep in him. Brett closed his eyes,  letting his head fall back. He pulled Eddy down, having him fully pressed against his pelvic bone. With a guttural growl he spilled deep into him, pressing against his prostate and rubbing against it which caused Eddy to be pushed over. He collapsed on Brett’s chest, Brett’s dick slipping out with a wet plop as he did.

“Hmm, that was good,” Eddy murmured as he closed his eyes. Brett was a bit blanked out but heard his boyfriend's voice, so he hummed faintly.

_______

“I love you,” Brett yawned once he awoke from his nap, his human blanket soon stirring awake after the words were murmured.

Eddy blinked his eyes open, “I love you too Brett.” 

He smiled lazily and tiredly, “Should we get cleaned up. I think I got our couch all dirty.”

“I guess we’ll have to get a new one,”  Brett teased softly.