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Spending time with him from the Fifty seven years , I realised this is what my heart has been aching for. ....what i feared for ...
I enter the room ...
I saw him .....
His once healthy and fit body , was now hollow , nearly like a skeleton ....
His vitals were showing on the heart monitor ...
He was on his death bed ....
His forehead is more wrinkled than ever remember , his cheeks sagging, with grey, practically white hair all Over the pillow ,
His once lovely blue eyes ....was almost lifeless ..
But he looks so young ......
He looks like the first time i saw him .
I hug him ...
I hold on to him
If i let him go , he will. Disappear ....
He tilted his head back, feeling the gentle stretch of his skin across his jaw,and i touching, his cheek and his neck; blonde eyelashes fluttered slightly as his eyes closed.
He rubs circles on my back ...
He is comforting me ...
He is wipping my tears , which falls endless ..
Her love of Fifty seven years ...
Her love
Her best friend
Her lover
Her husband
Her companion
Her soul mates .....
Of fifty seven years ...
Doesn't have much time left....
I broke down ...
I couldn't hold my tears ...
I am hysterical sobbing...
The tears of the feeling of emptiness, the feeling of undeniable urge of holding my hand and asking me to stay forever, the feeling of desperate longing in his almost lifeless eyes to embrace me in him arms and not letting me go, the feelings of the fear of my inner voice which is trying to conceal the fact that i was afraid to lose him , the tears of the feeling of getting abandoned and being left alone all of a sudden.
I hug him , i knows what's the feeling , i holds him in my arm , while silent tears felt from his eyes.
His lips parted slightly as he tried to get out the words he wanted to tell him.....
I caresses his back .
I stared at him before looking at the ground, leaning his head into my warm embrace .
I smiled and continued to move my hand across his warm , wet and soft cheek, curling my fingers , wiping his tears and caressing his sharp jawline.
Feeling of his soft, yet calloused hands secured in-between her fingers., My ring finger still has the genrade pin , which he used to symbolize the beginning of their 'marriage'.
I hold his hand .....
I hold his hand .Our hands are clumsy, too big for our skinny limbs, not sure where to go or what to think. But , its warm . These hands hold blood and lives of countless people .
I touch it, once, his skin warm under my fingers, a reminder of how alive we are. How young we are , our past lives , our lives before , how we came together
I. leaned in and gently kissed his head, resting my forehead on his.
i hugs him , i knows what's the feeling , he holds me in him arm , while silent tears felt from his eyes.
A beautiful cheekbone lined by the rising sun, beautiful in its simplicity. I touch it, once, his skin warm under my fingers, a reminder of how alive we are.
How young we are , our past lives , our lives before , how we came together.
I couldn't no longer hug him , read to him , protect , sung to him , kiss him , love him ....
I still remember
Back when our marriage was fake
Back when we were Agent TWILIGHT and THORN PRINCESS .
At first , we just doesn't want to admit that. We are attached to each other it's just that we are unaware of that.
Soon the walls broke ..
A bond was forgered.
A bond came to form ..
With little to no effort, he managed to throw me off-balance, snatched away all the sharpened edges i had taken years to Master ..
And in the process, i had softened his heart and made him re-learn the meaning of trust, affection, courage.
And love. He gave me protection.
He made me fall in love ..
He gave me reason to live . A person to protect .
He gave me a family .
His Sweet lies , poisoned my heart .. His Sweet truth , penetrates my heart
.
Twilight was used to lies.
Lying was his life, and he was one of the biggest liars of all.
He didn't care much about it. Everyone lied at some point.
But there was something about my lover , his tone, his words, his actions that made him see the genuine behind those sentences.
Like the time when one of his targets threatened to kill those me and Anya , and his response of never letting that happen sounded so... real.
Or when he took a bullet for me ... He was truly protecting those he cared about.
When , the walls felt ,
Our love bloomed
.....
Back when our marriage was Fake ....
Back when we were still just code names..
We used to hold hands
We used to touch each ....
Those left lingering touches and pecks ...
Still Holding his hand and walking alongside his was giving me immense pleasure.
I use to tighten the grip of my hand whenever I had the urge to kiss him even in a public place.
I still remember our first kiss as if it was yesterday
I still remember our first real date
I still remember our first night together.....
I still remember him bawling his eyes out when our children were born
I still remember him bawling when Anya graduate
I still remember him sobbing when Franky and Sylvia passed away ...
I STILL remember his crying out loudly when children got married
I still remember him , smiling and tearing at the site of his grand children ...
I Still remember...
We are holding each other ..........
The flowers we gifted eachother were witness to our love ....
Carnation ......we witness to birth of our children....
Iris Sunflower Tulip and Daisy
Witnessed kisses and touches
Roses , Dahlia , Forget-Me-Not , Orchid
Saw the wedding and married life ....
Love blooming like cherry blossom..
To us , its timeless ....
To him , been with me is a dream ...
To me , been with him is a drea
Geranium , Violet , Gardenia , Lilac , Magnolia......
We are together ....
It has been 57 years ..
He gives me flowers .
Me gives him flowers .
We have a Garden together ..
Baby's Breath , Azalea , Camellia , Lotus, Acacia .
We are old now . Both were in lockdown .
We grow flowers together. ..
Poppy, Peony Magnolia :-
We are together till death .
Untill death do us apart .
We know each other ..
Flowers are like love ....
Its love
Love are flowers
“I take thee, Yor..... for better or for worse... for richer or poorer... in good times and in bad, in sickness and in health... I pledge myself to you.”
" I take thee, Loid..... for better or for worse... for richer or poorer... in good times and in bad, in sickness and in health... I pledge myself to you.”
Just like we promised eachother ....
The flowers sheds tears seeing our love .......
Treat love like a flower ....
It seemed fifth seven years just passed by in the blink of an eye.
Then came the inevitable moment of departure.
The moment of truth which I knew I had to prepare myself for at some point of time.
He couldnt no longer accompanied me anywhere ....
No longer could we spend our days together in this Little home , watching T. V. , Cleaning , reading , teaching our kid's kids , walking , cooking , call our children ....or go on dates
No longer dance
No longer holding each other
No longer kissing....
He was just holding my hand all the time and leaned on my shoulder.
When I sensed a wet patch on my shoulder, I realised he was crying.
He just hold my chin, glanced my head up and just kissed me then and there. It didn’t matter to me that.....this will be our last kiss.....
We had kissed a countless times before, but this was utterly different.
This time, he kissed me so deeply, that I almost forgot who is breathing for whom.
It was so fierce and just so intensely marvelous;
I could feel his blood within my veins and his heartbeat with in my soul.
I felt like Thorn Princess for a final time ..
, . I just did what I felt correct at that time to stop myself from crying.
He smiled as beautiful
His eyes started to close.
His breathing slowered
His hands started to be rigid and cold
His vitals became flat .......
Finally, when I kissed his cheek to say good bye, I could taste the salt of my tears.
I don't remember much after that ....
Its nearly two months and i am on my death bed ....
My children are crying
They have grown so much
I can't wait to move on
I can't wait to see my beloved
I will follow him to heaven or hell ..
The tears shed that day was not a sign of weakness.
For me, it was the sign of a pure heart.
For , i will soon met my beloved ...
On our grave , shall be all Flowers we gave each other