Chapter Text
"Jho! Tara na ba?" Stacey called out to her best friend, Jhoanna, who had been staring out the window far too long already since this morning. Who wouldn’t? Eh pang apat na niya yata ‘to as God’s strongest soldier/princess.
"Teh? Huy!" Stacey tried again, this time lightly tapping Jhoanna's shoulder. The latter looked up and saw Stacey's figure towering over her.
"Ay Staks! Sorry, medyo nagspace out lang." Jhoanna reasoned out with a small smile. “Ganda mo,” she said playfully and with all honesty.
"I know, Jhoanna. Sobrang ganda ko minsan hindi ko na alam kung bakit ang swerte mo at ikaw ang napili kong maging best friend,” Stacey declared with a teasing smirk.
Jhoanna raised an eyebrow and rolled her eyes after.
“Alam mo kanina ka pa sabog,” Stacey stated as she noticed Jhoanna being unusually weird today. She paused briefly. “Kinakabahan ka na naman ba?" She asked with a soft laugh, enough to put Jhoanna in a trance and draw her back in just as quick.
Sobrang ganda ni Stacey. Wala yatang araw na hindi naiisip ni Jhoanna kung gaano kaganda ang dalaga. Kung gaano siya ka swerte na nakikita niya to the front row seat brought about by their closeness. Lahat ng pwedeng maisip when it comes to sisterhood and friendship, lahat 'yon ay meron sila ni Stacey. From the small arguments and full-blown fights to comforting each other afterwards, the subtle flirting and snuggling in bed together. Lahat-lahat ng 'yon.
"Don't worry na, this time maayos naman talaga si Diego! Sobrang dreamy nya as a guy, and on top of that, may initiative siya pagdating sa akin. You know how much I've waited for this, diba? Feel na feel ko talaga na gusto nya ako. At ako? Alam kong gusto ko siya." She rambled on, causing Jhoanna to stiffen a bit, though Stacey didn't seem to notice.
This wasn't the first time Jhoanna had to meet one of Stacey's boyfriends. This happens more frequently than Jhoanna would have preferred, and more often than not, she would approve of the guy if that's what Stacey wanted.
Jhoanna’s 24/7 mantra was: if Stacey was down for it, then so was she.
Wala naman siyang choice, at kahit meron pa, alam niyang si Stacey ang pinakauna niyang ic-consider sa mga decisions niya.
That's how important her best friend was to Jhoanna.
"Oo na, teh. Dami mo na agad sinabi.” Jhoanna agreed absent-mindedly, pushing her glasses at the bridge of her nose with an attempt to pull herself together. She gave a faint smile. “Ikaw na yan eh. Syempre makapal at matigas talaga ang bungo mo." Jhoanna replied, her smile never reaching her eyes even with all the jokes thrown around.
"Hindi na din ako makapag-antay mameet yang si Diego. Sure ka bang hindi yan para kay Dora at hindi sa’yo?" Jhoanna asked, earning her a light
slap on the shoulder.
"Teh? Pagpapaselosin mo pa ako kay Dora, alam mo namang may topak ako. Awayin ko kaya yun si Diego ngayon?!" Stacey tried to play along with a mischievous grin.
“Hold up,” Stacey, still in character. “Matext nga si Diego.”
"Gaga ka talaga. Tara na nga," Jhoanna finally said, shaking her head with a chuckle. She stood up from her seat and walked towards the door when Jhoanna felt a gentle tug on her wrist.
"Wow, Jhoanna Christine Burgos Robles, hindi mo man lang talaga hahawakan kamay ko ah," Stacey said in her usual demanding tone. Her posture stiff with her arms crossed on her chest as she waited for Jhoanna's reaction.
It was brief and almost nonexistent, but Jhoanna was quick to notice the shakiness in her voice, and she instantly knew what the older meant.
Stacey was nervous. Kinakabahan ito at alam niya kung bakit.
Jhoanna felt her heart soften for a moment; a mutual and silent understanding passed between them. She didn't utter words of comfort, even though she felt the desire to.
She opted for Stacey’s hand instead, giving it a small and soft squeeze to reassure her that she'd always be around.
Despite Stacey’s mean exterior and tendencies to come off stronger than usual, Jhoanna knew deep down that it was Stacey who was truly anxious, not her. At Aaam niyang siya lang ang may alam non.
There was an unspoken thing between them, a bond that had developed over time where words often felt unnecessary.
At the very least, ako pa din may hawak ng kamay mo pag kinakabahan ka. Jhoanna thought to herself.
"Maka complete name naman 'to, ito na po madam! Si tampo naman agad." Jhoanna had a small grin, tugging Stacey closer, enough for her to feel the warmth radiating out of Stacey’s body. Jhoanna always felt close to Stacey but was never truly closer.
Maybe this was all she could get out of Stacey, and maybe it was all she needed for now.
Masaya pa din naman si Jhoanna, basta andyan lang si Stacey.
----
The two held hands as they reached the place Diego set for their early dinner. It was a cozy restaurant where Stacey lived. And it wasn't long until Jhoanna and Diego were standing face to face, hand still gripping Stacey's, proudly even as they exchanged polite greetings. Diego glanced at their intertwined hands with a friendly disposition, but before he could say anything, Stacey, glowing with excitement, let go of Jhoanna's hand to rush and greet Diego with a tight embrace.
"BABEEE."
"Hello, babe." Diego welcomed the embrace; a small smile spread across his face. He returned the hug with the same excitement.
He took a quick glance and acknowledged Jhoanna with a friendly nod.
Malayong-malayo sa bituka. Parang di ka na nasanay, Jho. She thought to herself as she felt a slight pang on her chest. There was a brief silence, and Jhoanna, being Jhoanna, went on to tease the two. "Ano lovebirds, alis na ba ako?"
"Uy teka, Jhoanna. Nice meeting you!" Diego reached out for a handshake. Jhoanna was reluctant to shake it but saw Stacey nod in approval.
"Likewise, ssob," Jhoanna plainly replied.
"Hindi mo nasabi na medyo kanto vibes din pala ‘tong si Jho?" Diego teased, nudging the girl who was clinging onto her.
"Jhoanna para sayo, ssob, anong Jho ka dyan?" The younger shot back; her tone was playful but carried a slight hint of seriousness.
Stacey smiled unknowingly, finally breaking the hug that lasted for a minute or so. "Ganyan talaga yan si Jho, very mabarda as a person, babe."
Jhoanna felt another pang in her chest; this time felt sharper. "Aray ha." She winced playfully, “Respeto naman sa mga single since birth.”
Diego laughed it off; his gentle hand was on the back of Stacey's as he proceeded to usher the two in their reserved table. There were various foods to feast on already, and Diego undoubtedly came in prepared with their meetup.
A slight frustration brew inside Jhoanna, and was eating her up whole. Was she annoyed? Jealous? Hurt? Kahit siya mismo hirap i-pin down kung ano na ba talagang naf-feel niya, para bang nag o-overlap na at hindi na siya sure kung ano u-uunahin niyang i-address.
"So, Jhoanna. Gusto ko lang mag thank you." Diego initiated the conversation, which earned a curious look from Jhoanna, who was now sitting alone in front of the couple, trying her best not to squirm at the situation she willingly put her idiotic self in.
"About saan, ssob? Baka ako bigla pagbayarin mo ah yari ka sakin."Jhoanna jested.
Stacey immediately kicked her shin under the table; Jhoanna hissed and did the same thing. They were going on with who could kick each other more until Diego decided to speak again.
"Kasi inalagaan mo si Stacey habang wala pa ako."
"Ah." Jhoanna fell silent; she felt a tight knot forming in her stomach as her playful mood came to a halt. She cast a quick glance at Stacey, who was now entirely fixated on Diego.
Jhoanna can’t blame her. Pogi at mukhang maayos nga talaga tong lalaki nya. On top of that, nagpapakita ‘to ng soft side nya kay Stacey. Alam ni Jhoanna na yun at yon ang kahinaan ni Stacey sa mga naging lalaki niya.
She instantly regretted looking at Stacey and redirected her attention to the man in front of her, finding it much more bearable if she didn't have to witness how attuned Stacey was with Diego and not with her.
May laban pa nga ba eh, kung ngayon pa lang parang talo na? Jhonna truly felt the situation was unfair. Sa lahat ng times pag nasa picture si Stacey never naging fair sa kanya ang tadhana.
Bakit sa dinami-dami ng pwedeng mangyari sa kanila ni Stacey, bakit never naging ganito? Bakit hindi siya ang mapakilala ni Stacey? Bakit kailangan sa kanya ipakilala 'tong mga lalaking nangangandarapa sa kanya? Bakit hindi na lang siya?
"Ang dami sa akin na-kwento ni Stacey about sa friendship niyo. Nakakagaan lang ng loob na alam kong nandyan ka para sa kanya. Pero no worries, Jhoanna, I got her from now on." Diego continued, pulling Jhoanna out of her trance with his presence, his gaze now fixed on Stacey this time with deep affection.
Stacey’s smile stretched from ear to ear; her eyes were barely visible from smiling too broadly when she heard him utter those words right in front of her best friend. It was reassuring to be with a man who was brave enough to be sincere and vulnerable with his intentions.
Stacey’s happiness was evident at this point, and Jhoanna could only look away, unable to no longer pretend this didn’t make her emotions swirl even further than she’d be able to catch later on.
Parang ang sarap humiga sa kalsada ah. Jhoanna made a decision this instant.
Kailangan na niya umalis.
"Ano ka ba? Pilit lang yon, ssob. Wala naman kasi ako lagi choice dyan kay Staks." Jhoanna tried to laugh it off, despite the full heaviness she felt inside. "Malalaman mo din yan soon." She added, feeling the weight of her chest drain the remaining energy she had to keep up the facade.
"Loko ka talaga, Jho. Stop ruining our moment." Stacey glared at her before giving her attention back to Diego, who had his hand resting at the back of his neck. "Ano, nahiya ka bigla?" Stacey teased, pulling the side of his head towards her, resting it on the crook of her neck. "Ang laki-laki mong tao pero batak ka talaga sa pagiging baby."
“Baby ko,” Stacey remarked playfully, and Diego?
Wala ng pake si Jhoanna.
She couldn't bear to witness their moment together any longer as she abruptly stood up from her seat.
Jhoanna was way past her limit anyway. So, she decided to gently excuse herself. She ought not to drag Stacey to her unsaid feelings anymore.
However, Stacey was quick to notice and hurried after the girl, leaving Diego behind, oblivious to the situation unfolding in front of him. "Wait, babe. Sumakit yata tiyan ni Jho. I'll be back," in which Diego nodded with a smile.
"Uy, Jho. San ka punta?"
"Uwi na sana ako,” Jhoanna answered, pero di pa din siya natigil sa paglalakad. Stacey grabbed her wrist in an attempt to stop her.
Bakit parang alam ni Stacey kung paano siya ulol-in? Sobrang gulong-gulo na si Jhoanna. It felt like she was fighting herself, her emotions all at once, pati yung taong nag c-cause mismo ng turmoil in her whole being.
“Nameet ko na si Diego so pwede naman na siguro diba?" Jhoanna snapped, but there was an undertone of pleading towards Stacey to let her go.
"Oo, pero ayaw mo ba kumain muna? Ang dami nya in-order, oh. Para satin pa naman yun," Stacey argued softly, never really knowing what’s going on with Jhoanna. Stacey looked back at their table and Jhoanna’s untouched food.
"More like para maimpress ka," Jhoanna retorted. Hindi nya na napigilan sarili niya nung nasabi nya yun, and Jhoanna was just as shocked.
Then Stacey snapped back, unable to hold the idea Jhoanna was pissed over something she couldn’t put a finger on. "And? Anong masama if that's what he's trying to do? I don't like your tone, Jho," she demanded, her eyes sharper than usual, attempting to obtain something she can decipher out of the girl’s abrupt reaction during their lunch.
Pero parang lalo lang nagmatigas si Jhoanna, unsettled by how this was all going.
"That's on you, Staks.” she said with finality. “I'm honestly not trying to start something here. Gusto ko lang talaga umuwi. It's been a tiring day for me, and I don't want to have to beg you just so I can go home." Jhoanna said defensively. it was slipping. The part of her she didn't want to. Oo, she was acting up, but she couldn't blame herself for feeling this way.
Stacey finally backed down, realizing she's been instigating something when Jhoanna's just not feeling it. Out of all the days, nga naman, ‘no? "Sorry, Jho. Gusto mo ba ihatid na lang din kita?"
"No, it's fine, Staks.” Jhoanna looked away. “Thank you for understanding, but papunta na din tropa ko since along the way, siya." She lied.
Stacey just nodded, “Sino? Let me know pag nakauwi ka na. Daan ako sa inyo later.”
“Wag na staks. May inom din kami kaya gusto ko muna magpahinga onti.” Jhoanna didn’t answer her question as she lied again. Wala naman talaga siyang inom, at knowing Stacey, for sure, s-sermonan niya kung sino mang sasama kay Jhoanna uminom.
Stacey felt her cheeks heat up in annoyance as soon as she heard the reason why Jhoanna wanted to go home early, it didn’t help that Jhoanna purposely ignored her question. “Ah, so may time ka uminom pero sa lakad na sinet natin a week ago, biglang pagod ka na?”
Stacey was about to get angry, and Jhoanna knew.
“Where is this going, Staks?” Jhoanna inquired tiringly. The last thing she wanted to happen today was to get into an argument with Stacey. She met Diego despite her internal protests, na pagod na siya.
Pagod na pagod maging pangalawa sa lahat ng major life decisions ni Stacey.
Pagod na pagod na sa paulit-ulit niyang pagpili sa mga gusto ni Stacey kahit alam niyang ikakasira niya lang ‘yon.
Pero anong magagawa ni Jhoanna? Kung siya naglatag ng lahat ng consequences, pero despite all of that, alam niyang hindi siya basta-basta humihindi kay Stacey. Wala eh. For as long as she could remember, it had been like that ever since she met Stacey.
Mali ba na for once, piliin nya yung sarili niya kahit sa gantong paraan na lang?
“You know what? Nevermind. Diego’s free today anyway. We can hang out instead.” And with that, Stacey casually walked away.
Jhoanna Robles on a different occasion would’ve grabbed Stacey Sevilleja by the wrist and pulled her into a hug. But this was not the case today.
With a heavy resignation on her part, she left the restaurant and texted Gwen and Mikha.
And if there had been an award for second placers, backup plans, and reserved options in the form of a person and a best friend, Jhoanna would be the first runner-up.