Work Text:
“Do you trust me, Matthew?”
(Jonathan doesn't, but he didn't ask Jonathan, who doesn't answer.)
Matthew, who gets off on taking risks and who has drunk far too much, as he usually does, smiles crookedly and answers, “Yes.” Unresisting, he lets Teddy move his wrists to rest above his head and stays silent and compliant as the cold steel of the handcuffs clicks into place and secures him where he is.
They're not the kind made for make-believe and they'll leave ugly marks on his skin but he likes that idea. Tomorrow, if he gets the chance, he'll carefully reveal a red band of irritated flesh 'by accident' when he lifts a glass of champagne and the cuff of his white shirt slips below the wrist. The bartender will pretend not to notice, just as that same bartender will pretend not to notice how many drinks he buys.
Matthew's relationship with alcohol isn't a healthy one. Neither is his relationship with Teddy. If he wanted to leave either of them he wouldn't know how but luckily he doesn't want to.
(Jonathan does know how it should be done and he also knows that a month from now he'll be struggling out of two self-inflicted addictions. One or the other is bound to be easier to quit, but it's not yet obvious whether it will be the alcohol or the man.)
Teddy eases the doubts and the worries that Matthew is too drunk to have with soft kisses. His mouth travels down along Matthew's throat, over his shoulder, and then follows the collarbone route to his chest. He licks at a nipple, teasing it hard with his tongue and making Matthew squirm beneath him, the handcuffs digging into his wrists with the sudden tug on the metal chain.
Trust or just the effect of soothing alcohol keeps Matthew from any urge to complain while Teddy moves him, lifting his legs so that his ass is exposed and available.
Teddy isn't gentle with him tonight. That's what the handcuffs are there for, but Matthew doesn't need to be restrained to make him stay where he is and both of them know that. Still, it was worth making sure he wouldn't give in to some fleeting desire for safety, to a passing thought that he didn't mean but acted on regardless.
Matthew's moans are loud from the start and get louder each time Teddy thrusts into him harder. He needs this, he loves this.
(Jonathan deserves this. It doesn't hurt enough but it's better than nothing.)
The effects of the alcohol he poured into himself tonight dull his senses and thus the sensations; next time Matthew should drink less before he goes to bed with Teddy. He won't, but he should, and it would be nice if he could. He trusts Teddy to make him feel it anyway, to go hard on him and not to hold back for any reason as trivial as concern or consent. It's very freeing. It means Matthew can just lie there and take it, with no obligation to do any more than that.
Teddy likes to be trusted but he has been far too trusting himself in the case of Matthew: Teddy might suspect an ulterior business motive or that his lover lied about being single but he doesn't seem to doubt that Matthew exists.
Matthew does not exist. He is entirely fictional, nothing more than a story told by Jonathan, who doesn't even want to be here in the first place.
Matthew clearly does exist – how could he be here otherwise? At the very least he must be partly real, built on a solid foundation with another name but the same face and the same irresistible need to be in this bed at this moment.
(Jonathan must also exist, because who else would have any reason to worry about it?)
Real or not, he does trust Teddy, or he wants to, or he doesn't but that sensible part of him has been knocked out and removed from the discussion for now. He might not trust him tomorrow, or the day after, and he didn't trust him yesterday but any moment that isn't now doesn't matter; nothing that doesn't change Matthew's decisions is truly real right now. Those things might as well not exist.
(Jonathan exists, of course. He's real almost all the time. His relationship with Matthew isn't a healthy one but since both of them have contributed to that he refuses to bear the blame alone.)