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Heroes & Villainesses: A Bite Out of Crime

Summary:

In this new installment of Heroes & Villainesses, a feisty little thief bites off more than she can chew... only she's not the one doing the butt biting.

Notes:

Another collaboration between gghhffll ( https://archiveofourown.org/users/gghhffll ) and myself on this AU.

Chapter Text

A high-speed train barreled its way through the countryside, its exterior glistening under the radiant glow of the sun. In one of its compartments, a young woman sat all by her lonesome. Her hair was reddish and wild like a bush, and the bulky green jacket did nothing to highlight her petite figure. The split seams across her midnight blue jeans exposed tanned skin underneath.


Her name was Merida Dunbroch, age 20, and she had experienced more in this last year than most people did their entire lives. Back then, she was the daughter of an influential tycoon who held his child to the highest moral standards, raised to be nothing short of a prim and proper young lady: dressed in only the most formal attire, not a hair out of place, she was never one to step out of bounds, a true angel in her father’s eye.


But like many having grown up in such a stringent environment, Merida yearned for the sweet taste of freedom; and if she couldn’t have it by conventional means then she would have to take it by force. So, descending from her second story bedroom window on one stormy night, she made a mad dash for independence with nothing but the clothes on her back and a heaping wad of cash her father kept in his safe.


She took to the road, going wherever she wanted, partying and drinking and throwing her money around until the well ran dry. At that point, she did what anyone would have done under such circumstances: she stole. Dressed in a long green tunic, armed with bow and arrows –archery had been her only hobby up to that point- she was a true Robin Hood, robbing the rich and giving to poor little Merida, and having grown up in that world of affluence, she knew exactly how to do it.


Alas no plan is ever truly perfect, forcing her to hop train by train to the next town in search for yet another house to infiltrate. In fact, right now she was aiming for her next big score, one which seemed to have fallen right into her lap.


“Yes, I’m calling in regard to my home’s insurance policy.” A smooth, fancy voice emanated from just outside the compartment. “My parents and I are going to be out of town for the weekend, and I’d like to confirm that our belongings will be covered in case anything were to happen to them.”


Merida listened carefully, peering out through the small window on the car door. She caught a glimpse of the back of a young man’s head, the cue being the phone at his ear. The mop of unruly brown hair contrasted sharply with his elegant clothes, clearly expensive. Surely his family would have a collection of ornate art or something for her to make a quick buck; but for the time being all she could do was gather as much information as possible.


“The address is Sharpshot Road, n°27.” Wow he was making this too easy. She almost felt guilty for taking advantage of his obliviousness -almost “Just to let you know, we’ll be taking our dog with us; we don’t want to deal with hiring a house sitter.”


A smile crossed Merida’s face, knowing just how many doggy doors she had capitalized on with her slim physique.


“So I’m covered in the case of theft, correct? I want to make sure my wife’s jewelry will be safe.”


Jackpot: nothing is faster and simpler than to steal a woman’s diamond earrings, let alone the pearls and necklaces probably stashed away for special occasions. Rich men are so careless, she had come to realize; but than again, they can afford to be. The moment they had reached the next stop, Merida nonchalantly left the train, having memorized all the information she needs.


Later that night she tracked down the address, which led to a two-story colonial house surrounded by a line of bushes. Making her way up the front yard, Merida hugged the side of the building and peeked around the corner of the backyard. She nearly jumped for joy upon spotting the small doggy door she had hoped to find. She gave a gentle push, having a hunch that the owner didn’t even bother to lock it before leaving.
Once again her deduction was proven correct. Really, she was doing this guy a favor by showing him the dangers of the real world.

 

Kneeling on the ground, Merida first slid her bow and quiver of arrows through the door.


That done,, she started to crawl into the opening as she had done many times before, feeling the cool linoleum underneath her palms as her head and torso gained access to the kitchen.


“This is so easy it’s boring.” The redhead laughed. “Come on, give me a challenge!”
She should’ve known better than to tempt fate.


As she kept inching her way forward, the doorway unexpectedly began to constrict around her waist, tightening its grasp until she found herself stuck.


“DAMMIT!” She cursed her round feminine hips, narrow but not enough to cross the shrunken passage.


Merida resolved to go with plan B and simply kick down the door, and tried to retreat back the way she came. But struggle as she might, it was no use: she was hopelessly trapped halfway and unable to move in either direction.


A wave of panic washed over her, fearing that she may be left until morning, when the neighbors spot her pathetically caught in the act. She bit her lip and frantically wracked her brain to come up with a way to escape this humiliating predicament.
“Digital security is nothing to scoff at, miss eavesdropper.” A familiar voice suddenly came from outside. “My cameras haven’t lost you since you stepped foot inside the property. I knew you were coming of course, but I wasn’t sure when to activate the size-regulated doggy door. Congrats on your thin waist by the way, I had to use the poodle setting to fit it.”


Merida felt as if the floor had dropped from underneath her. The phone call on the train, the conveniently laid out information… it was a convoluted trap all along? Just who was this deranged man? Her blood boiled in anger at being caught in such a compromising position. She opened her mouth to scream an insult, only to be stopped dead in her tracks by his next words.


“I’d keep those pretty lips shut if I were you.” The man advised her. “Believe me: you do NOT want to wake the owner of this house and his vicious dogs Thornado and Rumblehorn. You see, Stoick Haddock is a police chief of five hundred pounds, most of which is muscle, and always sleeps with a shotgun under the pillow. Frankly he’s more likely to shoot you than ask any questions.”


If she could, Merida would have kicked herself for being so foolish as to take everything the man said on the train as the absolute truth without a background check, believing that it be pointless.


“But even if you could sweet-talk your way out of a bullet to the head, you’d only be looking towards a burglary charge, not to mention a number of other felonies in multiple cities; isn’t that right Merida Dunbroch?”


Whatever trace of color had been left in Merida’s face was siphoned away as her identity was uncovered by this man of whom, it turns out, she knew nothing about.
“Of course that doesn’t mean I can’t still deliver a preemptive punishment for trying to rob what you thought was my house.”


The thief gasped. Punishment? What did he mean by that? What was he going to do? Her mind raced a million miles a minute, knowing that the only thing standing between her and freedom was this mysterious voice, searching for a way to persuade him to let her go: should she beg? Barter? What could she even offer? All these thoughts paralyzed her with indecision, something she had never experienced up until now.


“Oh, this is going to be a blast.” The man’s voice was full of mirth. “Don’t worry, I’ll make sure you have fun too.”


A hand wrapped itself around her left ankle, making her reflexively kick in surprise, the iron grip keeping her foot in place no matter how much she fought it. Confusion filled her as the sneaker was untied and slipped off, her sock going right along with it. The same happened to her other foot, revealing pink heels, rosy soles and plump toes.
“Ew, your feet are filthy!” The man exclaimed. It was true that, with her transient lifestyle, the opportunities to catch a quick shower were few and far inbetween. “You can’t walk around with dirty feet in someone else’s house, that’s just rude. We’re going to have to fix that.”

 


A weight settled on her calves, like the man had sat on them, forcing her legs into immobility. Merida was baffled as to what may be in store for her. She heard the sound of a zipper being undone followed by rustling, as though the man was looking for something. Little did she know he was retrieving a large brush from a duffle bag, one that was making its way towards her left sole.


“Let’s get started.”


“Ppppppphfhfhfhfhfhfhfhf!” Merida sputtered, overwhelmed by the sudden sensation as the brush vigorously scrubbed the layer of filth and dried mud atop her heel. She clamped her lips shut, too scared to scream for fear of the owner lurking upstairs and his dogs, the frustration of such a predicament making the tickling that much worse.
The bristles flew across her sensitive soles, caressing the flesh atop the bottom of her right foot, ravenously scraping its entire length without regard then changing directions the moment she began losing sensitivity to the maddening touch. Whoever he was, this guy clearly had experience in the tickling business.


“You know, I could work a lot faster if you’d quit squirming so much.” The man goaded his distraught captive, descending into the flailing toes, a silent shriek emanating from Merida’s strained gullet despite her best efforts to keep quiet. “Aaand, done!”


Merida let out a sigh of relief.


“Now we can get started with the punishment.”


Her whole body went numb in horror. Wasn’t THIS the punishment?


Apparently not, as ten skittering nails now crawled across her pudgy digits. She pounded a fist on the floor, thrusting the other into her mouth to muffle the escaping giggles, locked in a never-ending limbo of suffering and forced mirth, trying to find a way to convince this deranged sadist to stop. However, the more time she was forced to endure his wrath upon her hapless feet, the more hopeless her situation felt.


“These toes are so cute!” The man cooed, inserting his nimble fingers in between the webbing of Merida’s toes, making her claw at the floor in desperation. Tears fell from her eyes, face red as an apple. She was absolutely livid. “Thanks for letting me play with them.”


How wicked this fate was: stuck with no hope of escape, forced to choose between tortured silence and a sure three-year prison sentence, all constructed by someone she had just seen on a train that very morning. In a desperate move, she did something she should have done many tickles before.


“SSSTTTAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAPPPPP!!!”


Her harrowing cry echoed throughout the house, right as the teasing inflicted on her feet finally came to an end. Soon after, Merida was startled by the sound of a door opening in the distance, the subtle patter of approaching footsteps making she quiver in fear but also relief; better to face an angry cop than a crazy psychopath. The kitchen lights flipped on…


To reveal the same auburn-haired young man from the train standing right before her…. in an outfit that made the redhead’s brain freeze up.


“Guess I’m a double liar.” Her captor, dressed in the armor of the dragon riding hero Night Fury, shrugged, a mischievous note in his words. “Turns out the owner is away for the night, working on some important case.”

 

 

Any relief she might have felt at that news was drowned out by the dread of seeing that she was face to face with a superhero. Panic was the only thing to restart her brain. “A… a superhero... targeted ME?!”

 

Leaning against the kitchen counter, her captor rolled his eyes at this. “Don’t sell yourself so short. You’ve been robbing some pretty influential and wealthy people. Some of us were starting to get the impression we were dealing with an extremely devious and resourceful  master thief who could have all manner of criminal connections and contacts her work helps fund.”

 

Merida’s cheeks puffed up with pride at that statement. “Well, I am pretty good.”

 

“Yeah,” teasing grin spreading on his face, the hero informed her that, “so you can imagine that it was pretty disappointing to learn that the ‘master thief’ we’ve started looking for is just a small time little robber and runaway who has no idea what she’s doing.”

 

“The hell did you just say?!” Merida snapped, indignant and pushing her hands hard against the floor, trying to free herself and lunge towards Night Fury as he had a little laugh ta her reaction. “I’m, uurgghhh, a modern day Robin Hood, you, GRGGHH, cocky basta-!”

 

“BARK, BARK!”

 

She froze at the sound of what seemed like angry dogs outside, growling sounds following those barks.

 

“Should probably mention that I’m not a triple liar.” her captor informed her, explaining that, “I was serious about the dogs. I’ve got them pretty calm but they don’t seem to like angry intruders making a commotion, even if it is one as pretty as you.”

 

Merida’s body remained still, especially as she felt the dogs get closer and brush against her legs. This left her uncomfortably positioned with her back arced and her chest thrust out. If she were in a less dangerous position, she’d be glad that her tunic meant her thrust out breasts weren’t being perfectly shown off by this undignified pose.

 

“To continue though, yeah, you really are small time.” Night Fury told her, elaborating that, “And easier to track than you think. It didn’t take me too long to connect the thefts with sightings of the runaway Dunbroch heiress who’s been running around on an endless and way too expensive for her situation party spree.”

 

Watching her sweat and remain stiff as a board, Hiccup caught her eyes and felt a little sympathy rise up at the fear he saw in them. “Don’t get loud or cause trouble and the dogs won’t do anything.” She still remained frozen in this position.

 

No way was Merida trusting that not to be another trick and invitation for trouble.

 

Shaking his head ta this, Night Fury approached her and reached down to grab onto her tunic. “Wait, don’t-!”

 

*whoosh*

 

The tunic, loosely fitted onto her thin frame, was removed.

 

Removed and there she was lacking her usual green jacket or any form of shirt, leaving her chest covered by just a green novelty double C cup bra that’s cups were shaped like four leaf clovers. The underwear she’d bought for a laugh was becoming an increasingly regretted choice. I'm not even Irish, should have just gotten something plaid, that'd be Scottish looking and less... THIS!

 

The thief (her pose broken) had to grab onto the hero to avoid faceplanting down onto the floor. Her boobs were now pressed right up against his crotch and he grunted at the stimulation.

 

They both froze for a moment, her blush brighter than his. “…I didn’t think you’d be this forward.” Hiccup said awkwardly.

 

With an angry cry, Merida threw her fist into his stomach.

 

“URUGH!” And okay, she had a pretty good punch, making him feel that even through his light armor.

 

“BARK!”

“BARK!”

 

Two angry barks were the only warning Merida had before the dogs, alarmed by her yell and the sound of their master’s son in pain, lunged forward and sunk their teeth into her rear end, one mouth per perk butt cheek.

 

“KYYYYAAAHHHOOOWWW!” Sharp and stinging PAIN filled her buttocks, those soft cheeks being harshly nommed by the canines and sending the redhead into desperate clawing at the floor as she tried to free herself. “CALL ‘EM OO-AHHFFFF!” she begged, voice high and filled with desperation.

 

Her thrashing got her breasts bouncing in the (rather lacking in support) novely bra that was holding them, distracting her captor for a few moments as he enjoyed the display of jiggle physics.

 

Up, down, swing to the side-

 

“PLEEAASSSE!”

 

Right, time for a little bit of mercy.

 

Getting a remote from his pocket, Hiccup tapped a button, widening the doggy door a little.

 

Merida pulled her ass forward through it at high speed-

 

*rrrriiiiip*

 

-and with no regard for her jeans, the seat of the fabric tearing off along the sharp teeth assaulting her ass.

 

Staring as she fell forward, her tormentor was rewarded with the sight of her green panties sporting a large gold colored clover on both of her throbbing buttocks. Whistling at the sight, he confessed that, “Okay, the Irish undies are a pretty sexy look, even if they are kinda dorky.”

 

Merida seethed. “Shut it!” she demanded, angrily picking herself up and grabbing her bow. To close to be using her arrows, she instead used the bow as a blunt instrument, taking a swing at him that the hero easily avoided, dodging the second swing as well while maneuvering behind her.

 

Grabbing the brush he had earlier used on her feet Night Fury now turned it and swung the hard wooden wide against her exposed and already sore butt with a nice THWACK sound from the impact and an adorable, pained “YEEP” sound from her.

 

“Did you seriously just SPANK me?!” she questioned, resisting the urge to rub her abused bottom and instead going for a horizontal swing at her opponent.

 

Ducking underneath the attack and rolling behind her with a quip that “Well, it is fitting for a wild child like you.” before striking her butt with the improvised paddle again.

 

“Gyah, uygh, the hell it is!” A good kick to his side while he was still in a crouch knocked the hero over, only for him to kick at her knees and bring her down with him… boobs right on his face.

 

This might have been an advantageous position with him lightly dazed by that and enjoying the feeling of boobs on his face-

 

*CHOMP*

*CHOMP*

 

-except that she had forgotten the dogs and now her eyes were wide as they bit down on her butt cheeks once again after following the intruder in.

 

“AAAGGHHOOOWWWW!” her body shot up straight, hips squirming from the pain in her rear.

 

“Hold!” the boy beneath her called out and the dogs, their teeth still on her butt, ceased chomping while Night Fury’s arms encircled her waist  to hold her in place.

 

Unable to wriggle free for fear of provoking the dogs, Merida looked down and saw him grinning at her.

 

 

“So, feel like surrendering,” he asked, tilting his head to gesture at the pair of canines holding her ass hostage, “or do you wanna squeal some more first?”

 

“I surrender! I surrender- not!” In an amazing display of acrobatics Merida threw a double kick at the rottweilers, driving the heels of her feet into their unprotected bellies and forcing them to let go. Using the impact as a springboard as propellant, she broke free of Fury’s grip as well and performed a handstand followed by a cartwheel that brought her to a dark corner of the room, beside her quiver. Cackling in glee, she reached for one of the arrows.

 

CHOMP

 

The pain was so intense that, paradoxically, she didn’t feel anything at first; as if her nervous system had shut down out of self-preservation. Slowly, agonizingly so, the thief craned her neck to peek over her shoulder.

 

It took her several seconds to make out, in the dim light, a shadow darker than its surroundings. Two green orbs lit up, staring at her in cold contempt. Right underneath, the blackness shifted to reveal a maw wide enough to envelop her entire bottom and two rows of impossibly long, ridiculously sharp metal teeth not untike a beartrap, all sinking into the tender flesh of her tushy. By comparison, the rottweilers were but a playful nibble.

 

Mercifully, unconsciousness claimed Merida before the pain could.

 

No matter. Pain will get its turn soon as she wakes up.