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Carla Connor sat at a table in the visiting room of HMP Norcross. She wasn’t entirely sure how she had ended up here. She certainly didn’t know how, during her ID check, they hadn’t realised that she wasn’t Lisa. They didn’t look alike. But, with Lisa’s ID, she had scored her way in and was now waiting for Lisa’s ex-wife to arrive.
Becky Swain.
The woman who had tried to destroy their relationship. Kidnapped her and left her dead.
She looked up when Becky slouched into the room. She watched her scan the place for Lisa. And watched her face fall when she saw Carla instead. But still, she approached, slumping into the chair opposite.
“You could get in trouble for being here,” Becky said. “That VO was for Lisa, not you.”
“I know,” Carla said. “I’ve done worse. Not really bothered.”
Becky shrugged but kept her eyes fixed on Carla.
“So, how’s life treating you in here?” Carla asked. “Must be tough. In prison. A bent copper.”
She might have said the last three words deliberately loudly. She saw Becky wince.
“I get by,” Becky said. “Survive. Always have. Always do.”
“Until your own wife arrested you and sent you to prison,” Carla remarked.
“Yeah, not my favourite day,” Becky agreed.
“Thoroughly deserved though, eh?”
Becky lent forward, irritated. She rested her elbows on the table.
“I pleaded guilty, didn’t I?”
“Only because Betsy came and put you in your place,” Carla said. “Before that you were going to try and drag Lisa down with you. What did you think would happen? You’d share a cell and get back together?”
Becky merely shrugged.
“So, you took her back, did you? After she betrayed you?”
Carla glared at her.
“Honestly, I thought you had a bit more about you than that. I mean, we were shagging from the moment you ‘left’,” Becky said. “She told me she’d fallen back in love with me. She was desperate for the three of us to run away together.”
Carla just laughed and shook her head.
“Do you think Lisa and I haven’t talked everything through? That talking hasn’t been part of our healing process? Because despite what you were like with her, she and I are honest with each other. Even when it hurts.”
“So, you know all the mucky little details then?” Becky said, looking smug.
“I know it happened once. That you manipulated her until she believed I’d abandoned her. And when she was at her lowest ebb, absolutely broken… you took advantage to get what you wanted.”
“Well, it certainly didn’t seem like I was taking advantage,” Becky smirked.
Her face never faltered.
“Not the way she was screaming my name,” she finished.
Carla laughed again.
“Yeah, if she did that it was because she was faking.”
For the first time, Becky looked stricken.
“Well, she would tell you that, wouldn’t she?”
“She wouldn’t lie,” Carla said firmly.
“So, yeah. I know it happened once. I know you took advantage of her. I know it was shit. And I know the first thing she did afterwards was leave me a voice message to say how much she loved me and wanted me back. I also know she only left with you that night because you’d made her fear for Betsy’s life. And unlike you, Betsy is the most important person in her world. She’d do anything for her.”
“What do you mean, unlike me?” Becky snapped. “I love my daughter.”
“So much that you abandoned her for four years? That you manipulated and controlled her mother? Got rid of me? Was about to abandon her all over again after the crash so you wouldn’t go to prison?”
Becky swallowed.
“I love me daughter,” she repeated.
“Shame she doesn’t love you anymore then, eh?”
“She does. She’s struggling with everything but she still loves me.”
“Really? Because I heard she told you she wished you were dead,” Carla challenged.
“Heat of the moment.”
“Sure. Yeah.”
The two women glared at each other.
“Why did you want to see Lisa?” Carla asked.
“None of your business,” Becky said. “And I don’t think she’ll be too happy when she finds out what you’ve done.”
“She would have just ripped the visiting order up,” Carla said. “She doesn’t want anything to do with you. She also hates you. She can barely even say your name.”
“Bullshit. She loves me. She’s always loved me.”
“She did love you once, although honestly, I have no idea why. But not anymore.”
Becky looked down for a moment.
“So, what did you want?” Carla asked. “I’m happy to pass on a message.”
Becky looked back up.
“I wanted to talk about the divorce.”
“What about it? It’s done. She got the papers days ago. You must have too.”
“I did. And it made me feel sad that it’s come to this.”
“She’s not sad. She’s absolutely jubilant, actually. We’ve already booked the venue. Sent out the invitations. We’re getting married in a matter of weeks.”
Becky looked startled.
“What?”
“Yep. You’re the ex-wife now. I’ll be the wife. And Lisa and I will live happily ever after.”
“You’re really that pathetic that you’re marrying someone who fucked another woman three months ago?”
“I’m not prepared to discuss all that again,” Carla told her.
“Hurts too much?”
“Lisa and I have healed. We’ve worked through everything. I actually think we’re even happier than we were before you did your Lady Lazarus act.”
Becky snorted.
“So, what did you want to say about the divorce?”
For a moment, Becky looked genuinely vulnerable.
“I wanted to tell her I was sad.”
“I’ll pass it on,” Carla said sharply.
Becky glared at her.
“Do you have any idea how much you fucked their lives up?” Carla asked incredulously.
Becky shrugged.
“Do you really not know all the agony you put them through?”
“I was in agony too!”
“Yeah. So you’ve said a million times. You never stopped to listen to their story though, did you? So many awful things happened and they all go back to you,” Carla said.
Becky sat back, arms folded.
“Go on then.”
“You spent all your time during your marriage, creating a barrier between Lisa and Betsy. You never wanted Lisa included in anything. You pushed her out. She lived with so much pain while you were together because your daughter only ever wanted you. And then you fucked off and left them. You left them completely alone and without the ability to communicate.”
“How the fuck would you know what my marriage was like?”
“I listen. Lisa is open and honest with me about everything.”
Becky just glared.
“Betsy used to climb into Lisa’s bed at night, crying herself to sleep. And then in the day time, she’d just ignore her. Or become abusive. And Lisa… She was a broken mess. She threw herself into work because it was the only thing she knew how to do. She lost all her friends. She lost her life. She was two and a half years into grieving you when we met. And I was the first person to show her any kindness.”
“Well, aren’t you a fucking saint?” Becky snapped.
“No, I’m not. I’m just a person. Who saw another person in pain. Who tried to help.”
“By jumping into bed with her?”
“We didn’t jump into bed with each other. We built up a friendship of mutual respect and affection. It was months later when we nearly kissed for the first time. And do you know what happened?”
“Do I want to know?” Becky asked, rolling her eyes.
“She ran away and blanked me for weeks. Because of you. Because she thought she was betraying you.”
“She was!”
“No, she wasn’t. And don’t pretend like you never met anyone while you were gone. Four years and you were entirely alone? Bullshit.”
“I was!”
“Bullshit,” Carla repeated.
“What does it matter now anyway?” Becky asked, almost sulkily.
“When we did eventually get together, it was incredible,” Carla continued.
“Yeah, I really don’t want to know!” Becky said. “I had enough of it when I was sleeping on the sofa, hearing you at it all night. Me, stuck downstairs by myself while you were shagging my wife!”
Carla smiled a little smugly. But then her face fell.
“When Betsy found out, she threw a glass of water over Lisa,” she said soberly.
Becky just shrugged.
“She also arranged for some thugs to rob my factory,” Carla said. “They battered me. Left me with a bleed on the brain. Sepsis. Kidney failure. I nearly died. And all because you left Lisa a widow and Betsy without one of her Mums. Faking your death. Letting them grieve you. When they should have known you’d just abandoned them.”
“Shame you didn’t die, really,” Becky said, unaffected. “Then when I came back, Lisa and I could have just picked up where we left off.”
“But that’s the thing, isn’t it?” Carla challenged.
Becky looked confused.
“You wouldn’t have come back if I’d died, would you? You didn’t come back because some bloke had died. Or because Betsy was turning eighteen. You saw on Lisa’s socials that she was engaged and you just wanted to ruin it for her. It was fine all the while she was sad and alone. And maybe even when you thought we were dating each other. But when we bought a house together. When we got engaged. No. You had to come back because you couldn’t let Lisa be happy with someone else. Not that it sounds like she was ever truly happy with you, anyway.”
“Yes, she was!”
“Not the way she tells it.”
“Well, obviously she’s not going to be singing my praises now, is she?”
“Obviously,” Carla agreed. “She’s desperate for me to know how much she loves me. I know she feels guilty for everything that happened. That she beats herself up over it. But I don’t want her to feel that way. Because I love her more than anyone I’ve ever known. And you know what? She told me the same thing. That she didn’t know what true love was until she met me. That she didn’t know how it felt to be so cared for, so adored.”
“You’re lying.”
“But I’m not though.”
Becky swallowed. Her eyes burned into Carla’s, who remained unflinching.
“Did Betsy tell you about Mason?” Carla asked.
Becky just shrugged.
“Another thing you destroyed for someone you claim to love.”
“I do love Betsy,” Becky insisted.
“Mason was Betsy’s first love. He risked his whole life to help Lisa catch your killers. They murdered him. They stabbed him and left him to die. The woman who found him ended up with PTSD. Betsy lost the first boy she’d ever loved. Because of you.”
“I didn’t ask him to risk his life,” Becky said stubbornly.
“No. But your fake death is what led to his murder,” Carla said. “And then there’s everything that happened after. My brother took me and Lisa hostage. Lisa saved us. And ended up shooting Betsy by accident.”
Becky swallowed.
“And you would have known about that, wouldn’t you? You were following their lives closely enough. And yet, you still didn’t come home. Not for your daughter. Not when she was in hospital having surgery. Not when she was suffering with paralysis. Not when she was faking that it was still going on because she was so traumatised by all the shit that’s gone on in her life. Not when she stole a van and nearly got sent down for it. No. Again, you only came back when Lisa was happy.”
“You have no idea what you’re talking about,” Becky insisted.
“Don’t I? Well, let’s talk about Lisa, shall we? Let’s talk about her fear of telling me she loved me because again, she thought she was betraying you. She’d only ever said those words to you before and it took me nearly dying – again – for her to say it. Took me nearly dying the first time for her to admit she even wanted to be with me. All because of you and the damage you inflicted on her.”
Becky just glared.
“And have you got any idea what her mental health has been like over the last year?”
“Mental health,” Becky scoffed. “Don’t come at me with all this shit. She’s never suffered with mental health. She’s a bloody Detective.”
“One of her colleagues was murdered. It triggered so much trauma in her. She practically had a breakdown. Couldn’t function. Made stupid mistakes at work. Ended up in counselling.”
“Lisa doesn’t even believe in counselling.”
“Well, she did it. And it helped.”
She narrowed her eyes, staring Becky out.
“She felt so fucking guilty for what happened. That you’d been at odds. That you argued. That she drank herself stupid and woke up a widow. She’s carried the pain of that guilt for years and it wasn’t even real, Becky!”
Becky glanced around, as Carla raised her voice.
“She couldn’t get excited about the house. About anything in our lives. She was just broken.”
“And you’re the hero who put her back together, I suppose?” Becky said, rolling her eyes.
“No. She’s the hero who put herself back together.”
Becky laughed, full of mirth.
“I just helped. I loved her and supported her the way she always deserved. The way she needed.”
“Like I said, Saint Carla,” Becky mocked.
“Are you not even sorry? For any of it? For the way you hurt your wife and child? For the guilt Lisa carried? You know, she spent years wishing she wasn’t even here. She’d put herself in harm’s way without a thought for herself because she was so broken over you and your death. She got hit by a car. Did you know that? And she couldn’t even tell anyone because she was scared of triggering trauma in Betsy after what had happened to you.”
“At least she survived, eh?” Becky smirked.
“You’re an appalling person,” Carla said. “I knew it the moment I laid eyes on you. That you weren’t the Becky that Lisa and Betsy had always described. That you were cruel. Selfish. Controlling. A bully.”
“I am none of those things,” Becky insisted.
Carla leant in.
“You’re all of them,” she said. “You were greedy. You were corrupt. You were cruel. You’ve ended lives. Ruined others. But what I came here to tell you is that you’re never getting the opportunity to ruin Lisa and Betsy’s lives again. They’ve healed. They’ve rebuilt. They’ve earned a happy future. You and Lisa are divorced and me and her are getting married. We’re going to live happily ever after and you cannot touch us again.”
“Is it embarrassing for you?” Becky asked.
“What?” Carla asked, thrown by the question.
“I mean, I had to take you to the toilet. Pull your pants down and everything. Are you embarrassed?”
“What you did to me… all of it… It has no reflection on me. It’s all about you and the person you are.”
She leant in.
“Do you really think that someone as kind and gentle and wonderful as Lisa could ever love someone like you? That the truth about you wouldn’t absolutely disgust her?”
Becky swallowed. She quietly insisted that Lisa did love her.
“She always will,” she said.
Carla shook her head.
“She doesn’t.”
“Why? Because she’s yours now?” Becky challenged.
Carla laughed and shook her head.
“That’s what you don’t get, isn’t it? The way you talk about her, like she’s a piece of meat. A possession. Lisa isn’t yours. She isn’t mine. She belongs to herself. And all I can be is grateful she saw something in me that she could fall in love with. And pity you for throwing it all awake.”
She stood up.
“Don’t send any more visiting orders,” she warned. “They won’t be accepted. Lisa’s moving on with her life. So is Betsy. I hope you can too, although I doubt it, stuck in here.”
She fixed Becky with one more glare.
“Have a nice life,” she said, striding away.
Lisa’s eyes lit up when Carla arrived back through the door. She had Connie on her hip in the kitchen and was preparing a bottle.
“Hi!” she greeted warmly. “How was your day?”
“Erm…” Carla said awkwardly. “It was… interesting.”
Lisa eyed her quizzically, as she sat down with Connie in her arms. The baby began to guzzle milk from the bottle eagerly. Carla took her coat and shoes off and set her bag down. Then she came to sit beside her.
“Did something happen at work?” Lisa worried.
“No,” Carla said.
She had been dreading admitting where she’d been, all the way home. But like she’d said to Becky, she and Lisa didn’t lie to each other.
“I erm… I went to see Becky.”
“What?” Lisa shouted in panic.
Connie complained vocally about the noise and loss of milk. Lisa apologised and settled her. Then she looked at Carla.
“What are you playing at?” she said in a hushed tone.
“She sent you a visiting order,” Carla explained.
Lisa looked even more confused. Even more concerned.
“What do you mean?”
“I mean, I picked up the post yesterday and I saw a letter to you from the prison. I panicked and I opened it. Saw a visiting order there so I went to see her this afternoon.”
“Carla…”
“I wanted her to know every bad thing she and her ‘death’ had caused,” Carla told her. “And I wanted to tell her that she can’t touch us anymore. None of us. That we’re happy. That we’re getting married. And that we’re going to live happily ever after.”
Lisa nodded thoughtfully.
“Do you um… want to know how she is?” Carla asked, fearing the answer.
Lisa gazed at her for a moment. Then she gazed down at Connie, who was falling asleep already. She looked back at Carla, reaching out to hold her hand.
“No,” she said honestly. “I don’t care. She’s nothing to me now.”
Carla let out a long breath.
“Are you angry with me? For opening your post? For going to see her?”
“Of course not,” Lisa said. “Carla, she nearly killed you. She kidnapped you. Tortured you.”
“Yeah…” Carla breathed, feeling suddenly tearful.
“You deserve some closure,” Lisa said.
Carla nodded. Exhaustion overwhelmed her.
“Come here,” Lisa said, opening up her free arm.
Carla snuggled into her embrace. She gently stroked baby Connie, who had given up on the milk and was sleeping soundly.
“I know how lucky I am to be allowed my happy ever after with you, Carla Connor,” Lisa said thoughtfully.
Carla snuggled in a little closer.
“You’re my whole world, Lisa Swain,” she replied.