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"It's the rainy season at the rebellion, a crucial part of this ecosystem. If the desert got no rain, there would be no water for the cactuses that feed the animals who live there. All the animals of the ecosystem would die off if there was no rain. But still, during this season, Till wishes the rain would stop, even just for a moment.
The desert surrounding the rebellion has a few months of rain, June to September. 3 months that feel like eternity to Till. Because every day he wakes up and it’s the first thing he hears, the only thing he hears besides his ragged breaths, until Ivan holds him in his arms and whispers reassurances to him until he eventually calms down. Or rather, until he gets pissed off and leaves because of the suffocating embarrassment that follows being vulnerable. But even after he’s not in the middle of a panic attack, the anxiety clings to him.
Every day he feels like he’s trying to walk while neck deep in quicksand. Every step makes him sink deeper into his bad thoughts until he can’t breathe again and he breaks down, again. Over and over, until the rain stops and the desert is back to its dry, hot, normal state."
Recent bookmarks
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What do you mean dead people can't have birthday parties? by somestarboy
Fandoms: Gachiakuta (Anime)
04 Apr 2026
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Summary
Rudo's missing. Not, like, missing-missing, but he won't come hang out with Guita, Remlin and Dear! When the kids learn that Rudo's in some sort of funk, Guita resolves to make sure her friend is happy. What better to do than throw a party! The question is, who's the party for?
It's for Rudo's dead dad.
Bookmarked by 8sparky
05 Apr 2026
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Summary
Rudo has an unexpected guest in the night.
Series
- Part 1 of Big Bro Rudo
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 2,000
- Chapters:
- 2/2
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 17
- Kudos:
- 211
- Bookmarks:
- 31
- Hits:
- 1,154
Bookmarked by 8sparky
05 Apr 2026
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Summary
For as long as Till could remember, he had always had nightmares. He didn't think he had ever had a single sleep that didn't have some form of uneasy nightmare. They only get worse as he begins losing the only people he would consider his friends. They were the worst they'd ever been once he joined the rebel base, plagued by the image of his best friend bleeding out in front of him. It only gets worse when he wakes up to that very corpse glaring at him. Or is he?
Bookmarked by 8sparky
03 Apr 2026
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Summary
Tell me all the time not to worry
And think of all the time I'll have with you
When I won't wake up on my own
Held close all the time, knowing I'm half of you· · ─ ·✶· ─ · ·
or, yet another Ivan lives AUSeries
- Part 1 of Ivan lives AU
Bookmarked by 8sparky
30 Mar 2026
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Summary
After dating Atsumu for several months Kiyoomi came to the realization he didn't truly know Atsumu.
Diagnosed with OCD and a panic disorder, Atsumu found it hard to let people in.
Kiyoomi was persistent.
Series
- Part 1 of You're not a monster, just human
Bookmarked by 8sparky
24 Mar 2026

