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*Oneshot now turned twoshot. Part 2 up!
Alastor likes to play a game every rut cycle. He’ll go to a bar and scout out potential partners. He doesn’t actually plan on having sex with any of them and never does. But he finds the chase exciting. He likes to get their hopes up and then dash them.
This rut cycle, his mark is a new demon whose strange box head fascinates Alastor. Then the demon tells Alastor he also has two penises.
Intrigued, Alastor asks to take a peek.
Shameless smut written for bottom Alastor week on Twitter, prompt “Rut/ Dirty Talk.” Alastor has deer traits and is in a rut. Vox has two shark dicks (including the spines.)
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Vox's greatest dream has come true. He and Alastor have finally made amends and gone official. Living together, being all domestic, getting freaky—the whole package.
But for Vox, shaking off a lifetime's worth of insecurity and baggage is still easier said than done, and with the arrival of Alastor's birthday, everything comes to a head as he desperately tries to ensure it's Alastor's best one yet.
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“It would be a shame,” the seraphim said at last, “to let such raw power simply disappear.”
“I think you have a much more… purposeful existence ahead of you.”
***
Heaven decides killing Vox would be too easy. Worse, it might make him a martyr.
Instead, they turn him into something much more useful: a living relay between realms, wired into a machine built to monitor Hell itself.
Now Vox exists in the currents that thread through Pentagram City—fragmented, furious, and forced to report to the very angels who imprisoned him.
Or: a post-Season 2 fallout AU
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“I remember this one,” Vox says.
Alastor’s humming stops. Anxiety tastes like acid on the back of Vox's tongue.
“As do I,” Alastor admits.
Vox swallows past the lump in his throat. He can taste smoke in the air, feel Alastor’s hair brushing the edge of his face in his memories.
“Dance with me?” he asks.
Alastor freezes.
Vox freezes.
They stare at each other wordlessly, twin expressions of shock and apprehension.
There are ghosts behind Alastor’s grin. He wonders if Alastor can see the moments that haunt him too, a thousand memories pixelating into a reckless longing reflected in his wide eyes.
~~~~~
In which there is dancing, and a monumental shift.
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One's a Company, Two's a Crowd, and Three's a Party by Ki_Ken_Tai_Ichi
Fandoms: Hazbin Hotel (Cartoon)
29 Nov 2025
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Summary
In a strange turn of events, Alastor has found himself in the possession of three suitors.
One who is in it for revenge.
One who is in it for spite.
And one who is in it for love.