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Summary
Stiles can’t help but feel like he’s been lied to.
Legally Blonde all but guaranteed immediate mastery over all coursework and an effortless discovery of his one true purpose. Instead, every class is a confusing nightmare, and the only revelation he’s had so far is that he might actually be too socially incompetent to make friends.
Given that the sum of his accumulated attempts at having a quintessential, life-changing college experience is a resounding zero, Stiles is left with one very disappointing conclusion:
Elle Woods is a fucking liar.
[Written for Sterek Big Bang 2024/2025. Lovely art courtesy of the talented Renmackree.]
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 31,854
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 45
- Kudos:
- 466
- Bookmarks:
- 111
- Hits:
- 8,293
Bookmarked by Hope_art3
29 Mar 2026
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It’s a tentative, fragile thing, what they have together. Nothing more than the bare bones of something that might, in a different world, be worth defining.
Which means they fuck a lot, but not much else.
Stiles is okay with it, but he also knows himself pretty well by now, and enforcing a clear divide between sex and feelings has never been his vibe. Derek, though—Derek is skittish. A bunny-rabbit-heart beating fast, fast, fast beneath the sharp teeth and claws of a wolf’s costume.
He sees it, even if Derek pretends otherwise.
But also:
“Can you give us, like, two minutes, tops?" Stiles asks, a bit desperate. "Some of us didn’t get to orgasm, and I'm not naming any names here, but—yeah, okay, it’s me.”
His dad exhales, tired and displeased, the kind of breath that usually comes right before he puts Stiles under strict house arrest.
"Hale," he says resolutely. "Get your goddamn ass off my kid."
Bookmarked by Hope_art3
28 Mar 2026
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Summary
Stiles doesn’t think there’s anything wrong with him, except maybe chronic over-caffeination. But his dad’s retired K-9, Bandit, disagrees. According to TikTok, that means cancer. Or seizures. Or secret pregnancy. Cue Stiles in an exam room, shirt off, face burning, while Derek Hale—yes, that Derek Hale, his long-forgotten high school crush turned absurdly hot doctor—takes his medical history like it’s no big deal. It’s fine. Totally fine. Not a meet-cute. Definitely not.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 45,131
- Chapters:
- 11/11
- Comments:
- 238
- Kudos:
- 967
- Bookmarks:
- 215
- Hits:
- 16,694
Bookmarked by Hope_art3
16 Mar 2026
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Summary
Stiles didn’t clear his schedule, buy half of Amazon’s sex toy aisle, and douche like a champion while his Quantico diploma glared at him from the wall, just to back out now.
He’s going to take Derek Hale’s monster cock or die trying.
Bookmarked by Hope_art3
13 Mar 2026
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Summary
The man nods once. Doesn’t break stride. Doesn’t smile. Just that stiff, silent acknowledgment like the world’s made of tolerable obstacles and he’s choosing not to bark at them.
Stiles blinks.
Deputy.
Oh. Oh.
Well that makes things easier.
Not that he was struggling. Please. He could find Officer Puppym on a map, in a nightmare, from memory alone with three broken crayons and a prayer. But now he’s got a job title, a department, and the knowledge that someone in that department is walking around Beacon Hills in government-issued pants with three semi-feral emotional support grenades at his heels.
But now he’s got a job title, a department, and the deeply unnerving realization that someone in his dad’s department is walking around Beacon Hills in government-issued pants with three semi-feral emotional support grenades at his heels.
Which is fine. Fine. It’s not like Stiles has a type or anything.
Series
- Part 17 of Sterek Oneshots
Bookmarked by Hope_art3
23 Feb 2026
