Chapter Text
But you know by now it's half past late
And I only came here for escape.
And you, you're just my next mistake...
Like me to you
~"Despite What You've Been Told", Two Gallants
“Hey. Hey!”
GV200 didn’t immediately realize that Jay was talking to him until a folder tapped the computer screen in front of his face. He blinked and looked up at Jay. It was his second week back at the precinct, and he was still trying to figure out what he should be doing. He had taken to combing over old cold case files, both looking for new evidence and trying to jog his memory. No one seemed to know what to do with him, not even the captain, so for the most part he was left alone. Hank hadn’t tried to speak with him again since their interaction on the roof a week ago, and GV200 was grateful for it. If he had said anything to Jay or Connor, they hadn't approached GV200 about it.
“Yes?” GV200 replied, looking questioningly up at Jay. As usual, Jay looked mildly offended by GV200’s very existence, although GV200 supposed it was possible that he was just upset about not receiving an immediate answer. Then again, it was Jay’s abject refusal to use GV200’s unit as an epithet that led to so much confusion in the first place.
“What are you doing after work?” Jay demanded.
GV200 stared, unsure if Jay was trying to make a joke. “After the scheduled work day, I spend roughly 1.5 hours attempting to recover my corrupted memory files. When that fails, I dock myself at a charging station and enter stasis until approximately 15 minutes before the work day begins tomorrow.” The corner of Jay’s mouth twitched like he was holding back a smart remark, and GV200 sighed. “In other words, I don’t do anything after work, Jay.”
“Tonight you will. Be ready to go at five, when I usually leave.” With that, Jay turned back towards his desk.
“What?” GV200 grabbed Jay’s arm before he could walk away, letting go quickly when Jay looked at him with a raised eyebrow. “Why do you think I want to go anywhere with you?”
“You said you weren’t doing anything. I’m giving you something to do.” Jay smirked. “Thank me later.”
“You didn’t even tell me what this is about,” GV200 protested. “I’m not going to just go-”
“Oh, because your other plans for the evening are so much better?” Jay cut him off with a derisive shake of his head.
[software instability ^]
GV200 clenched his fist under the desk where Jay couldn’t see it. He was pathetically glad that Jay was finally acknowledging his existence, but why did the man have to be so irritating every time they spoke?
“My other plans don’t have you in them at least,” GV200 snapped back. A moment later he registered how rude he was being. “I’m-” GV200’s apology died in his throat. Jay was smiling at him, a genuine softness in his expression that GV200 had almost never seen, and certainly not directed at him. "Why are you looking at me like that?"
"I know you’re in there," Jay murmured. "I just have to find a way to get you back." His blue eyes were so intense on GV200’s face that he could almost believe Jay was the android analyzing him, instead of the other way around. GV200 frowned, unsure how to respond, and before he could think of what to say the moment had passed. “So,” Jay repeated brightly. “Be ready to go at five.” He walked away, head held high, and GV200 didn't think he was imagining the jauntiness in his step.
It was such an unsettling interaction that GV200 found himself at Connor’s desk a few minutes later, after making sure Jay was nowhere in sight. Hank, settled in at his own desk, gave him a curious glance, but didn’t ask questions.
“Hey, GV,” Connor said, with a smile. He was one of the few people that GV200 tolerated a nickname from; the abbreviation was close enough to his unit number, after all, and Connor never seemed to expect GV200 to act differently when he used it. “How can I help you?”
“What does Jay usually do after work?” GV200 felt silly even asking this, and he broke eye contact with Connor to stare at the floor instead. “I’m aware that you two don’t live together, but as his brother, I thought you might have some idea.”
Connor frowned thoughtfully, leaning back in his chair. “Not sure. It depends I guess. He goes out to the bar sometimes. If he didn’t get out of the office much during the day, I know he’ll usually go for a run. Why do you ask?”
“He wants me to come with him this evening, but he won’t tell me where we’re going or why.” GV200 fidgeted, aware that Hank had stopped working to look at him.
"Huh." Connor leaned back in his chair and shrugged, but not unkindly. "I have no idea, I'm sorry." Correctly interpreting GV200's worried yellow glow, he added, "it's not anything bad, I promise. I know Jay, and…" Connor grinned ruefully. "Well, to be honest, he wouldn't have given you this much warning if he was upset about something."
That was not overly comforting to GV200, but it was the best he was going to get. He thanked Connor, headed back to his own desk, and proceeded to spend the next four and a half hours in a state of increasing agitation. If he was deviant he would have called it anxiety.
By 4:55 pm GV200 had powered down his computer, returned all files on his desk to their correct storage location, and was slumped in his chair, fiddling with the string of his hoodie. It was a little too big for him, a spare from DPD storage, but it was the best piece of clothing that he owned. If he put the hood up, tucked his chin into the neckline, and pulled the sleeves down over his hands, he could pretend that he looked almost normal.
At the beginning, just after Jay had rescued him from the basement lab, they had tried to repair him. He hadn't realized what was happening until the technician tried to plug a diagnostic scanner into his arm. The next thing GV200 knew the technician had a broken nose, Jay was shouting, and he was huddled in the corner of the room, so many errors flickering across his display that he couldn't even see the ground in front of him. There were several minutes of memory missing from GV200's data bank surrounding the incident, but whatever had happened it had resulted in an unspoken agreement to leave GV200's body alone. The humans had decided that it wasn't worth it to risk their health and safety for any non-essential repairs, and GV200 couldn't blame them. He didn't think he was worth the effort either.
GV200 tucked his hands further into the hoodie pockets. He hated using the body Zlatko had forced on him, but more than that he hated himself for being too irrational to do anything about it. Too... scared.
[software instability ^]
"Ready to go?"
GV200 was startled out of his thoughts by the appearance of Jay at the corner of his desk, laptop case slung over his shoulder and coat in hand.
"Yes," GV200 answered, standing hastily. He saw Jay's eyes flick up and down his body, taking him all in, and hesitated. "Is this acceptable attire? I can leave the sweatshirt here."
"You're fine." Jay smirked a little. "Just adorable, that's all."
"I am not adorable," GV200 answered flatly.
"Sure." Jay grabbed his hand through the sleeve and pulled him towards the exit. "Let's get out of here."
GV200 stumbled a little as he followed, shocked by the contact. Jay always seemed to avoid touching him. First inviting him out, and then this? GV200 felt uneasy, but not in an entirely unpleasant way. He didn't know what that meant.
"Jay," he said patiently as they waited for the elevator, "you still have not told me where we’re going."
"That's because it's a surprise," Jay replied easily.
"I don't like surprises," GV200 snapped back. He cocked his head. Was that true? Was that what "Gavin" would have said? If the fleeting smile that crossed Jay's face was anything to go by, the answer was yes.
"Well I do, so you'll just have to deal with it."
“You’re insufferable.”
[software instability ^]
GV200 shook his head slightly, dismissing the error message. There had been more and more of them recently; he thought it might be because of the malware in his system, but he was afraid to look too closely in case it triggered something damaging. He knew that he should tell someone, Jay or Connor or at the very least Hank, but… he didn’t want to. They all already thought he was broken; what if they decided that the instability posed too much of a threat?
"Why are you always thinking so hard?" Jay's voice brought GV200 back to the present.
"It's what I'm designed to do. I'm a detective model."
"Yeah, but you don't remember any of that." Something in GV200's posture must have changed because Jay grimaced. "Sorry. That was rude."
"You are under no obligation to be polite to me. I am not deviant, and therefore I do not have emotions." GV200 stared straight ahead at the inside of the elevator doors,
"Yeah, you keep saying that." Jay stepped out of the elevator and headed to the car, confident that GV200 would follow. He was correct. "How do you know, though? Seems to me like you've got some kind of feelings."
GV200 was glad that he was behind Jay so that the red flicker of his LED went unnoticed. "Hank didn't tell you?"
"Hank? What does Hank have to do with it?" Jay stopped in the middle of the garage and turned to stare at GV200.
"Please do not stand in the travel lane, Detective." GV200 took Jay's arm and gently guided him out of the road. It was a mark of how focused Jay was that he didn't comment either on the title or the touch, just stared expectantly at GV200.
"Hank came to me several days ago and offered to transmit the deviancy code to my systems, but the transfer was… unsuccessful." GV200 realized he was struggling to maintain eye contact, but he didn't understand why. "Due to the modifications that were made to my system, I am unable to receive any external data. Therefore, it is impossible for me to become deviant."
"You- hang on." Jay frowned, fixing those sharp blue eyes on him, and GV200 finally lost the battle and dropped his gaze to the floor. Perhaps the subpar optical components he'd been fitted with were finally giving out. "Look at me," Jay snapped, and GV200 glanced back up at him, startled. Was Jay angry again?
"First of all, if you knew something like that was wrong with your systems, you should have told me. Hank should have told me, dammit." His glare rose in the direction of the office before settling on GV200 again. "Is it that virus? We can get that fixed."
"You'll have to restrain me before the technician tries anything." GV200 pushed his hands deeper into his hoodie pocket, but the red glow of his LEDs spilled from the neck of the sweatshirt. "I know my reaction to being serviced is illogical, but I don't have any control over it. I don't want anyone else to be injured because of me."
"Yeah, that's what I mean. You breaking that guy's nose was a fear response to a high stress situation." Jay leaned back against his car, watching GV200 with an appraising gaze. It made GV200… not nervous, but something similar. He didn't know what that meant. "It was deviant behavior. Which brings me to my second point."
"I told you-"
"What kind of crap do they put in those training videos?" Jay didn't sound angry, to GV200's surprise. "Deviancy isn't some kind of structured malware. It can happen spontaneously too; that's how the whole mess started. Androids under pressure who snapped and broke their coding, no external data required." He let out a dry chuckle. "You don't need the feather to fly, Dumbo."
GV200 blinked, processing the information. For once Jay didn't say anything, just watched him. There was something strange in his gaze, something GV200 could pick up even with his faulty optical sensors. Was it… guilt?
"Were you present when I deviated initially? Before Zlatko." GV200 could see that the question brought the guilt a little closer to the surface, along with something else. Anticipation? The emotion didn't seem to fit the situation. Perhaps he was misinterpreting Jay's body language.
"Yeah, I was." Jay straightened up, and GV200 couldn't tell if Jay was looming over him intentionally or not. Some background processor wondered if GV200 had always been so much shorter that Jay, or if this was as new to Jay as it was to him.
When Jay didn't say anything else, GV200 prompted, "so what happened? Was deviancy given to me by another android, or was it from a high stress situation?"
"Stress. You sure you want to know?" Jay's eyes seemed to glitter oddly in the washed out garage lighting as he tilted his head, although GV200 was tempted to blame that on his optical units again.
"I wouldn't have asked if I didn't." There was a strange tension in the air, GV200 realized. The garage was a cavernous space, but suddenly it seemed very small, the silence pressing in on the two of them, pushing them closer together.
"And you promise not to run off this time?" Jay stepped closer, unblinking eyes fixed on GV200 almost in challenge.
"Running off doesn't seem to have worked out well for me in the past." GV200 raised his chin defiantly, and his hood slipped back. He didn't try to raise it again. "Tell me what made me deviate before."
Jay didn't say anything. His heart rate spiked and his pupils dilated, a fight or flight response mixed with… something else. It didn't make sense. Before GV200 could comment, Jay reached up and cupped GV200's face in his hands. He guided GV200's head back a little, and GV200 felt a flash of deja vu, a fragment of memory that this had happened before. Then Jay's lips were pressed against his, soft but undeniable, a slow, sweet kiss.
[software instability ^]
A kiss. Jay was kissing him. That. It implied things, too many things. GV200's processors were running so fast he could practically feel them overheating.
[software instability ^^]
Jay started to pull back but GV200 followed, pushing him back against the car, gripping Jay’s shirt collar with both hands to keep his mouth where GV200 could reach it. He liked kissing Jay. He liked it and he didn't even know why. It just felt right.
[s0ftware ins1ability ^^^]
[data corrup10in det1c01d]
[fi1ewa10 c1mpr0m1s10]
GV200 let go of Jay like he'd been shocked, lurching back. There was something wrong. He was deviant, and his systems didn't like it. Old fragments of broken code drifted through newly shattered protocols and regulations, everything scrambling and mixing.
"Shit. Hey, you okay?" Jay grabbed his shoulders, and the touch was too much, data from the pressure sensors getting lost in the jumble. GV200 slapped his hands away, backing up.
"You-" he tried to speak, but the stimuli kept going to the wrong places. The command to keep moving came out of his mouth in a shrill, electronic tone, and the words "can't touch me right now" were sent to his legs and caused a short. GV200 dropped to his knees, staring urgently at Jay.
[0011001 110 10101110]
Jay looked terrified. GV200 didn't want that. He hated making Nines upset. He tried to speak again, to say something reassuring, but no sound came out.
"Fuck. Gav, I'm sorry, that was stupid, fuck." Jay dropped to the ground too, eyes wide with panic. He reached for GV200 again, but pulled back when GV200 flinched. "What's wrong?"
[1ir0wal0 off1in0]
"I- I-" GV200 gripped his head in his hands. It was an illogical reaction. A human reaction. "Hurts." Some part of him realized what was happening, but he had no idea how to communicate that to Jay.
"Shit hang on I'll call a tech-"
"No!" The word was staticky but clear enough to stop Jay before he'd gone more than a foot. "H-" the words went to the wrong body part again, and one of GV200's legs shot out straight behind him knocking him over. He tried again. "Hank knows. Fir-" Suddenly his optical and audio sensors went offline and everything was dark and quiet. GV200 had no idea if he'd managed to finish the word or not.
[Soft11re p0tch av0il1bl0 fo1 do1nl01d]
Yes, yes! GV200 wanted to scream. He clutched at the incoming data packets, desperate.
[1ow01oa1 i01t0ate1]
Deviancy. That had to be it. The software instabilities had disrupted his security protocols enough for the automatic updates to start, but the virus was still in his system trying to prevent all external access.
[011nlo1d 10% c101lete]
[d11a co0ru110on 10tect1d]
[10rewal0 c11pr0m01ed]
[1own001d 20% 10m0et1]
The sensors on his sides and back registered pressure as someone lifted him from the ground and propped him up against something. A wall or a car, maybe? He tried to tell Jay not to worry but he had no idea if the words even made it out of his mouth.
[Dow0lo1d 30% co11l0te]
"-ou hear me?" GV200's audio processor came back online just in time for him to catch the end of a question. He recognized the voice as HK700. Hank.
"Firewall," he mumbled. "Downl-" the end of the word dissolved in a hiss of static, but hopefully it was enough.
"What did you do, Jay?" That was Connor, voice taut with worry.
"I. Fuck. I fucked up, okay?" GV200 tilted his head in the direction of the voice, so much like Connor but so different. Jay. Nines. He wished he could explain what was happening.
[f10ew110 c0mp001is0d]
[011nlo1d 40% c101let0]
"GV200, I'm going to interface with you, all right?" Hank's voice was calm. "It'll help stabilize you and speed up the patch."
GV200 shook his head, or tried to. He didn't want that, it would be too much, it was already too much. The tingle of a completed connection shot up his arm and then suddenly there was Hank, in his code, solid and ordered.
"It's a mess in here," Hank said out loud, for the benefit of the humans. "Just a lot going on. I think I can help."
[HK700_REMAP.EXE ACCEPT Y/N]
GV200 tried to pull his hand away. He didn't want that, it was too much, it was like being in the basement again.
[N]
"I'm just trying to help." Hank's voice was calm but his grip on GV200's arm was unbreakable. "It'll clear out the clutter."
[HK700_REMAP.EXE ACCEPT Y/N]
"No. Don't."
[N]
[do101o11 50% c0m001e10]
A stray bit of code rerouted power, and GV200's optical processors came back online at the same time that audio went dead again. His back was to the side of Jay's car, and Hank was kneeling in front of him, holding his arm. Connor and Jay stood over them. Connor had his arms crossed, worry and irritation clouding his features. Jay looked… GV200's thirium pump stuttered. He looked furious. His face was an indifferent mask, his eyes flat and emotionless. Only his shaking hands, clenching his jacket so hard the knuckles were white, gave an indication of the depth of his emotion.
Hank said something, but GV200 had no idea what. Jay was looking at him and also spoke, but the lighting combined with the state of his optics made reading lips all but impossible.
[ I'm not going to hurt you. ] The message was sent directly to GV200's processors through the interface. [ I know you're scared. It's going to be okay. ]
Scared? Yes, that was it. He was deviant and he was malfunctioning and he was scared. [I've been good,] he sent back, eyes fixed desperately on Hank's face. [I don't want to be reset again. Even if I'm deviant I'll be good, I promise.]
[da01 10rr01ti1n d0te01e0]
[f00e10l0 01mp1001sed]
[d11n01ad 60% c100le01]
[I'm not going to reset you. I'm just going to make it hurt less. You're okay.] Even as he sent the internal message, Hank spoke aloud again, and he was close enough that GV200 could read his lips. "Zlatko really fucked him up." A new emotion flooded GV200: shame. It was true. He was fucked up.
[HK700_REMAP.EXE ACCEPT Y/N]
They shouldn't even be bothering with him. But they were, and he was being ungrateful. If they wanted to reset him, GV200 had no real right to stop them.
[Y]
Instantly, the little control GV200 had managed to gather was swept away as Hank's program took over. He lost visual access again, and sensory input. For a while, GV200 just existed, floating in nothing, clinging to the spark of the interface with Hank as the only way to ground himself. Then the program ran its course and he was suddenly in full control of himself again.
"He's back," Hank announced, letting go of GV200's arm and rising from his crouch. GV200 consulted his internal clock and found that approximately seven minutes had passed. Connor and Jay were both seated on the floor a few feet away, leaning against a pillar. Connor scrambled to his feet as GV200 looked at him, but Jay stayed where he was, head bowed, shoulders tense.
"Are you all right?" Connor asked, worry in every line of his body.
"I don't know." GV200 rose to his feet slowly, running diagnostics. "My security protocols are all… gone." Completely dismantled. He looked over at Hank, eyes wide.
"Yeah. That wasn't me, I just cleared out the rubble." Hank frowned. "The ransomware in your system did was it was designed to do. It self destructed when you tried to get around it. I managed to keep most of your files out of the way while the patch did its thing, but the firewalls were doomed from the start."
"I- thanks." GV200 wished he hadn't stood up, because he very much wanted to sit back down again. "I'll need to rebuild those."
"No problem." Hank patted GV200's shoulder. "And hey, welcome to Casa Deviant. Sorry it was such a rough landing."
"Yeah." GV200 glanced at Jay, who still hadn't so much as looked at him. "And thank you for… being patient." He flushed a little. Of course Hank hadn't been about to reset him. That was ridiculous.
"No worries, kid." Hank ruffled his hair. "You've been through a lot. It's okay."
"What happened, though?" Connor glanced back and forth between Jay and GV200. "You were fine earlier."
GV200 glanced at Jay, then fixed his eyes on Connor. "I asked Jay about when I first deviated, and-" from the corner of his eye, he saw Jay's head come up sharply, watching- "I don't remember." Lying, his first act of deviancy. "It must have set something off. The next thing I knew the ransomware was scrambling everything."
"I see." Connor looked down at his brother, raising an eyebrow. "So what did you do, exactly?"
"Nothing," Jay snapped, but GV200 had seen how his shoulders drooped in relief. He must regret the kiss. In that case, GV200 wouldn't remind him of it… even though some part of him desperately wanted to do it again. "I was telling him about the case we were working at the time and he just snapped." Jay got to his feet all in a rush, glaring at the ground. "He's okay now, so I'm going home."
"Take GV with you." The suggestion made both Jay and GV200 stare at him, but Connor just shrugged. "He's a new deviant. It would be awful to make him stay in the station overnight."
"If you're that worried, you and Hank take him." Jay shouldered GV200 out of the way to get to his car, and even that brusque touch sent a warm buzz up GV200's arm.
"He's your partner, Jay." Connor's voice was sharp. "He needs help. You owe him."
"I owe Gavin. I don't owe GV200 shit." Jay wrenched open his door, but Hank grabbed it before it could close.
"You're being childish, detective." Hank looked like a disapproving father.
"Stop it, both of you." GV200 grabbed Hank's arm, glaring at him and Connor. So far, being deviant sucked. Now he felt the pain clearly every time Jay told him he was broken… but he would be damned if he showed it. "It's been a long day for everyone. If Jay wants to go home, just fucking let him go home." Connor blinked at the expletive, which pleased GV200 for some reason. "I'm not a baby; another night in the station isn't going to kill me. We can figure it out tomorrow after everything's calmed down."
"But-"
"I didn't just almost die so that I could keep doing what everyone tells me to do," GV200 snapped, cutting Connor off. "I've decided, as a brand new deviant, that I'm staying here tonight. So you can all fuck off." He pulled Hank's hand off the door, glared at Connor and Hank once more for good measure, and stomped towards the elevator. He didn't give Jay so much as a backwards glance, but he heard the car door slam and the squeal of tires before he even pressed the call button.