Chapter Text
The shining steel train known as the “Marching Ants” rumbled along the wooden tracks laid out before it as it cut swiftly through the countryside of Goswing.
A young child no older than fifteen years of age watched the world go by in a blur. She wasn’t tall, nor muscled, nor quick of hand, and yet she alone was stronger than every person riding alongside her. Men who had spent years as politicians and metalworkers, women who tended to stoves and children without break, and children who- every day- went off to fight a war they only knew half about.
She would never say it out loud, of course, but Lavender Blue (better known and said as just “Blue”) knew deep down in her heart that there was no truer truth.
And yet, as the distance between her and her former life grew, she felt less and less sure of that.
As the dread of so many miles began to set in once more, she tore her eyes from the window and pulled out a photo from her satchel sat beside her on the red velvet seat of the train booth and held it tightly in her hands. This photo was a sacred memento of a past life- a life she never truly got to live in the first place. A life where she was only a girl with two parents and an aviary, a life where she didn’t have to worry about things like wars and the brothers lost to it.
At the thought of brothers, she glanced up at Hector, who sat across from her with his face resting against his propped up elbow as he dozed off. She chuckled softly when she noticed a bit of drool on the corner of his mouth, and remembered once again how big he has gotten in such a seemingly short amount of time. She had to thank her saints above that he hadn’t been taken too- at least not in the permanent way that other brothers were taken. Writing expository papers about government officials on the go was much better than writing goodbye papers to her and the rest of their shared Nauteline family on a battlefield.
They had both gotten lucky.
But how long was that luck supposed to last them?
As if the train no longer wanted her to dwell on such macabre thoughts, a screaming whistle pierced the air as they rolled through another town. Hector was startled from his slumber and rubbed his eyes to try and rouse himself further, and Blue tightened her grip on the photo again, not bothering to look at the town they passed as she had so eagerly done in the weeks before.
“Blue, you’re up,” Hector muttered, adjusting his hat and stretching his lanky legs. Blue perked up, once again torn away from her thoughts, and nodded. “Mornin’ Hec,” she said plainly. “Sleep well?” he asked, to which she disagreed.
“Nah. I’ve been havin’ trouble sleeping ever since that night Crow and I…”
At the mere mention of the memory, it came whirring back to her. A cold metal hand held tightly as she and her closest friend- Crow- had stowed away in the trunk of a car, watching Crow’s connection with the largest machine she’d ever seen in her life, soaring uncertainly over the sea, and then being shot down in a blazing inferno.
She still remembered the shock of cold seawater when the glass of the airship broke on impact, and the bruises she still wore that she had gotten from the whole endeavor.
She still remembered the last look she had seen on Crow’s face before she had turned away and Jack Jingle- a man she once thought she could trust- tore him from the machine and shut him off in the process.
That look had been so different than the one she remembered the most: where his fluffy orange scarf covered up the part of the robotic face he himself was scared of, and he held Goldie so delicately in his gloved hand.
As she tried to keep that last image in her head though, it began to warp and fade away, as her mind tried desperately to block out the trauma and him along with it.
She sighed in exhaustion and defeat, covering her face with her hand and grimacing. Why couldn’t they have just let Crow go?
Of course, she knew the grown-up’s reasoning, but that didn’t make it right. It wouldn’t ever make it right. And that’s why she had to find Crow. She just… she had to.
Hector looked away and fidgeted nervously, unsure of what to do now that he had made the atmosphere so tight. So, he decided to try and change the topic, hoping that it just might help.
“H-hey, umm…” he began, glancing over again and taking notice of the photo still clutched protectively in Blue’s hands. “What’s that photo you have there?”
“This?” Blue hummed in thought and handed it to Hector, trusting her brother subconsciously to keep it safe while he inspected it. “It’s me and my parents.”
“Look at that!” he exclaimed with a quizzical look as he took in the three figures in the black and white snapshot. “How come I’ve never seen this?”
“I hid it back when I was still impersonating as a newsboy,” Blue explained, taking the photo back from Hector and slipping it away into the pocket of her satchel. “I didn’t want anyone finding it and asking questions. I guess I could’ve said it was my younger sister or somethin’, but it was just easier to keep it hidden.”
“But I knew you were a girl all along!” he chuckled, ruffling her blonde hair and accidentally jostling Goldie, who had been resting on Blue’s shoulder and now chirped and ruffled her feathers in protest of the interruption of her nap. Blue giggled and batted away his hands, her signature grin finally back on her face. “Hey, quit it! Don’t act all huffy that I didn’t tell you. I was going to show you after I showed Mom, but then you left for your new fancy-smanshy journalism gig in the big city!”
Hector chuckled again and helped adjust her blue newsie hat back on her head. “Well sorry that I had to actually get a real job! I couldn’t go and pull a move like yours and bake cookies with mom all day.”
“Well we’ll certainly never know now!” Blue exclaimed, and they both laughed together. In those moments, both of their hearts felt light, and it was as if there had never been time lost between the two of them in the first place.
But as their laugher died down, the reality set in once more, and Blue sighed softly, turning her gaze back out to the new scattering of townhouses in the fields beyond the tracks. She still remembered the days before Hector left, when the military men came knocking at the doors of the Bugle, and Mrs. Muffy- the mayor’s wife and the woman who practically raised them both from day one- hid the two of them and the rest of the boys in the orphanage away in their rooms. She remembered the silence only broken by the ticking of the clock on their wall as they all waited anxiously. When it had finally been over, after what felt like hours of waiting, Hector was called into another room with Mrs. Muffy and the Mayor- Mr. Nancy, who talked to Hector about why the men had shown up at their doors at all.
Hector didn’t discuss it with the rest of them, but Blue knew what they had wanted. She always washed dishes in the evenings and talked with Mrs. Muffy, after all. Those men had come to recruit Hector for the war. A few days after that, though, the mayor scratched together the papers to send Hector away as an abroad reporter. He would still be close to the war, but at least he wouldn’t be fighting in it.
At least he wouldn’t disappear like Blue’s real parents had.
“But hey,” Blue started again, a faint smile still lingering on her lips, “maybe it’s best that you didn’t. I… never really got to know them well, and my memories of them have always been pretty hazy. You and Mom and Dad and the rest of the boys back at the Bugle are my family now. And besides, I should be thinking about the future, not dwellin’ on the past.”
Hector couldn’t help but feel as though he’d only made things worse, especially as Blue’s smile faded and her look grew more distant. He had never been the older brother figure he had always sought out to be to her. And when she needed him most, he had been forced to leave. That part had been out of his control, but what about the letters he never wrote? The calls he never made back to her? He had left her in the dark after he left, and no matter how hard he tried to convince himself that it was all for her safety, he knew the truth of it. He’d been a coward, unable to face his wrongdoings and trying to ignore them instead, and now he paid the price for it.
He would never regain the years he had lost with Blue, but he could sure as hell work hard to be better now. That was all he had left, after all.
“Blue, I-“ he began, but was cut off when he saw the expression on Blue’s face suddenly change. He turned and looked out the window to see what had caused it, and found himself staring into the depths of a deserted shell of a nightmare.
“What is this place?” Blue asked softly, touching her fingers delicately to the glass as if to reach out and stroke the tops of the soot-stained buildings, her crystal-blue eyes locked onto the shuttered windows and torn-up streets.
“It’s…” Hector hesitated, but then sighed reluctantly. She had the right to know. “It’s the confinement district. It’s where they housed everyone that looked Grimmaean. Blonde hair and black eyes, typically pale skin too.”
“Housed?” she echoed, not turning to look at Hector, who exhaled again with a grimace and let the heavy weight set into his heart. “I suppose ‘imprisoned’ would be a better word for it… at the beginning of the war, this is where they put them all before they had their identities confirmed. But… I think…”
“-That they never got to leave, even if they did,” Blue finished, still staring out at the empty buildings, her tone level and quiet. “Where are they all now?”
“When things really started heating up between Goswing and Grimmaea, the people within began to mass-revolt. They wanted to go home. The government did their best to cover it up, but I found enough archived documents to piece together what happened after that. The Goswish government deported most of them back to Grimmaea, but for those that had been accused of aiding the Grimmaean government…”
Hector didn’t need to finish the rest of the story, because he knew that Blue understood.
After a long beat of silence, she spoke again.
“Do you think she made it out?”
“Who?”
“My real mom. She… I think she was put there after my dad joined the war and couldn’t protect her anymore. I don’t think they saw me, or they would’ve taken me too. You found me about a week after she… after she left.”
Hector could feel the pain in her voice, and reached out a hand to reassuringly squeeze her shoulder. “I’m sure she made it out fine, Blue.”
But they both knew that there was no way of knowing.
Blue turned to look back at Hector, the pain in her eyes more apparent than ever, and Hector considered saying something again before another shrieking whistle rang out and the train began to slow.
“Looks like we’re gettin’ pretty close to Altalus, huh?” Blue said, turning away to start to adjust her things on the seat beside her.
“Blue-“
“Do you think it’ll be crowded there? I’m hopin’ it isn’t, so my stuff doesn’t get too jostled around.”
“Blue, listen-“
“And what about-“
“BLUE!”
Blue froze, and only then felt the tears streaming down her warm cheeks. She touched one with her fingertips just as delicately as she had touched the tops of the soot-buildings, and met Hector’s worried gaze. “Kiddo, you gotta slow down. Take things one step at a time. Breathe.”
She did as instructed, taking a few deep breaths with Hector’s guidance, and realized only after that she had been on the edge of a panic attack.
Hector kept talking to her calmly in order to keep her grounded, and Goldie nuzzled into her neck to try to offer comfort, but she could barely hear half of what he was saying. And when she was finally able to snap herself out of her daze, the train had reached the station and people were starting to stand and file out onto the platform.
“This is Corozana Station,” Hector explained to her as they stepped out with their bags and she waved back to the train conductor with a small smile. “I know a place where we can rest. It’ll be a bit of a walk, but you’ll be able to see some of the city.”
Blue nodded, taking in the architecture around her. There were two dozen pillars just on the side of the platform that they were on. Their bases were plain, but the tops fanned out to resemble a line of flying swans. She couldn’t recall ever seeing anything quite like it. Hector noticed and couldn’t help but smile. “They certainly didn’t have anything like that back in Nautilene, huh?” “No they didn’t…” Blue muttered, unable to take her eyes off of them, and Hector’s smile only grew brighter. “Oh, just wait until you see the rest of the city. There’s this one park that I always used to visit that has-“
“Fight For Goswing! Your courage wins the war!”
Hector was cut off by a shout, and when the both of them looked for the source, they noticed two people standing at the base of a pillar just a few down from the one they were standing closer to.
“Fight for Goswing!” the second person- a young man with greased-back black hair and a tidy gray suit- shouted out as the first person- a young woman in an olive coat and dress, handed out a newspaper to a passerby with a smile.
Hector and Blue began to walk past them on their way out of the station, but a third man in a light blue suit stopped Hector dead in his tracks with the same smile on his face as the woman. “Young man, are you enlisted?”
“Oh, sorry,” Hector began, gently pushing Blue behind him. “I’m employed as a reporter.”
“Well that’s certainly no excuse,” the man began with a chiding tone- as if he were playing the role of Hector’s father figure to get him to listen. “Every man of proper age ought to be fighting for our country’s honor! And by the looks of it, you’ve certainly got enough years on you! Now look here.” He held up a paper in Hector’s face and gestured to the headline: ‘DRAFT AGE LOWERED TO SEVENTEEN: JOIN NOW!’ “You ought to be doing something worthwhile instead of writing what’s already been written! Leave the writing to the boys who can’t fight. After all, it’s your courage that wins the war!”
The man looked quite proud of himself, and his companions did too, but Hector was horrified.
“Do you think this is some sort of game?” Hector huffed, shoving the newspaper down. “Lowering the draft age more and more? What’s next? Sixteen? Fourteen? TWELVE? If we recruit child soldiers, we’ll be no better than the Grimmaeans!”
Blue watched it all play out from behind Hector, trying to make herself small and unnoticeable so she wouldn’t be dragged into the argument, but soon she felt the stares all around them. “Hec…” she muttered, tugging on his sleeve to try and get him to stop, but it was too late. The others with the newspapers began approaching Hector to support their comrade. “Our country is different!” said the man in the blue suit. “Don’t you want to be a hero?” chimed the woman, her shrill voice giving Blue goosebumps. “Don’t you want to be a man?” said the grey-suited stranger. Hector began to back away slowly, keeping Blue behind him.
All eyes were on them.
“I’m a war journalist, okay?” Hector said sharply, and Blue couldn’t help but peek out and look at the others in front of them as he continued. “I’ve seen everything you’re talking about, and it’s not that great.”
“A lot of help you are!” “Scribbling while your countrymen fight for Goswing…” “You could have a real chance to kill some of those straw-haired barbarians over there!” “Such a waste.”
Blue’s eyes widened and she felt her blood run cold.
‘Barbarian.’
Was that really all she was seen as here? Some sort of prize game to be… to be…
She quickly put up her hood and dragged it down over her hair with her hand, but it was no use. She felt exposed now. She WAS exposed now. Goldie chirped quietly in her hoodie, fluffing up again.
“Listen, we’re leaving,” Hector stated with finality, turning away and guiding Blue out, but suddenly a flurry of white feathers pummeled them in the back and bloomed around them. “Looks like we’ve got a couple of chickens quaking in their feathers over here!” one of the men shouted. Another shouted after them “You’re not a real Goshwishman!”, followed by the woman’s shrill comment of “You two don’t deserve to brandish their Goswing swan!”
Hector and Blue ran as fast as they could, shielding themselves with their arms and their bags as they were pummeled with handfuls of feathers by other groups of propaganda spreaders throughout the train station. When they finally made out onto the street, they just kept on running, Blue’s hoodie flying off in the rush. She had to grab her hat so that wouldn’t fall off too. Goldie flew beside her and twittered an alarm, which is why Hector noticed.
“Blue! Follow me!” he called to her, and made a sudden sharp left. When Blue tried to follow, with Goldie now flying alongside her, she ran into a tall man in a black suit, and was knocked down onto the cobbled street beneath her. Her head banged into a rock, and the side of her head got a small knick, but more importantly than that: her hat was completely off. The moment she realized it, she tried putting it back on, but it was far too late. The man loomed over her, and so did everyone else in the street, who had turned to gawk and whisper.
Every set of eyes were on her.
It made her skin feel like it was on fire.
She tried to quickly explain herself, but she went unheard. None of them cared about what she had to say for herself.
They only cared about her hair.
Blonde.
Grimmaean.
“Young man,” boomed the man she had bumped into, “I don’t believe you belong here.”
All around her was black hair and blue eyes. Black and blue, black and blue, black and blue. Behind them, the signs blared red, decorated with more bold propaganda, which only emphasized them and their clear unified order.
She was the one thing that didn’t belong.
Just as the man began to reach for her, someone grabbed her from behind. She turned with a start, but managed to hold her tongue when she saw who it was.
Hector.
Goldie was on his shoulder now, chirping repeatedly with worry, but Blue couldn’t be happier to see them.
He helped Blue to her feet and grabbed her bag before holding her wrist just tightly enough to make it clear that she was not to speak until they were away from the crowd, looking at the man in front of them directly. “I’m sorry about him sir,” Hector apologized with ease. “He almost got away from me, but I got him now. Thank you for stopping him. I’ll take him to the officers myself.”
The man grumbled and crossed his arms. “Next time, keep your dog on a tighter leash. Especially today of all days.”
Blue’s whole body began to shake, and Hector squeezed her wrist a bit in a way only she would notice as he nodded to the man and thanked him once more before dragging Blue off to a nearby alleyway.
The moment they were out of sight, Hector dropped her bag and dragged her into a tight hug. Her body shook like a leaf, and she clung to him desperately, but he didn’t let her go. He just spoke softly again and told her exactly what she needed to know: that he didn’t mean a word of what he said back there, and that he would keep her safe no matter what.
“D-did you mean wh-what you said at the train station? Do Grimmaean’s really f-fight with their own kids?” Blue asked nervously, needing to know for her own sake, needing to know if her mother’s people could be so cruel, but Hector shook his head.
“No, I didn’t. Men and women like that only want to hear something that will get them on their feet. Something on their level. They never would have let me go if I had started telling them Grimmaea’s better qualities. True, some of the soldiers in Grimmaea’s armies are very young, but they chose to fight rather than being chosen. They aren’t forced.”
Blue thanked him, and they stayed in the alleyway for a while as Blue calmed down once more.
When she had stopped shaking and let him go, Hector pulled up a few abandoned and empty crates for them to sit on while he began organizing the things in their bags again and picking out feathers. “People here are a lot closer to the war, so they’ll judge you a lot harsher if you don’t look ‘properly Goswish’, even if you were born here. Altalus isn’t anything like Nautilene in this way. As the capital city, they have much higher standards as well for their people. There are rumors that people use hair dye and colored contacts in order to blend in better, but we don’t have access to that. And even if we tried, we’d seem suspicious as outsiders.”
“So, what, I’m supposed to just shave my hair off and hope they don’t ask why?” Blue snapped, before sighing and burying her face in her hands. “I’m sorry.”
“No no, it’s okay,” Hector reassured, patting her shoulder. “It’s okay to be upset. I’m just glad you recognize it. And we might not have access to dyes, but we’ll come up with something. Like…. Aha!” Hector had briefly scanned the alleyway before noticing something of interest and approaching it. Blue, for the very life of her, had no idea what he was doing when he suddenly and quite randomly approached a bag nearby, bent down, dug his hands into it, and approached her with a grin before brushing the contents of his hands into her hair.
She coughed as a plume of black powder filled the air around her, but she tried not to swat him away. “Jeez Hec, what are you doing to me?”
“Fixing your hair so you don’t stand out so much, now stop squirming.” After a few moments, he backed away with the smile still on his face and dusted off the black powder from his hands. “There. Now no one, unless they’re looking extra hard, will notice you.” He dug in his bag and handed her a pocket mirror, and she studied herself in shock.
Whatever he had put in her hair, it had completely covered up the blonde, and she now looked far less
‘other’. “What was that stuff?”
“Charcoal powder,” he explained as he tucked the mirror away and closed his bag. “There was a bag of charcoal over there, thank the saints. It won’t last forever, but it should be enough until we get to where we’re going and we can come up with a better solution.”
Blue nodded, still in awe of how she had appeared in the mirror, and went to take a lock of her hair between her fingers before Hector shrieked and grabbed her hand before she could touch her hair, laughing nervously. “Please don’t touch it. I have no idea how long it’ll last if you do, but it might just brush out. The less you mess with it, the better.”
“Ah, yeah, makes sense. Thanks Hec.” Blue flashed a smile, one that was quickly returned, and Hector held out his hand to her as he scooped up their bags again. “Ready to go back out there?”
Blue froze, seeing the crowds still flowing steadily through the street. A plethora of ‘what if’s filled her head, and she took a hesitant step back. But instead of scolding her, Hector hummed softly in understanding. “I know it’s scary out there, but the sooner we start heading out, the quicker we’ll be out of sight again, and we can relax all day tomorrow. And no matter what happens, I’m going to be right here for you.” Goldie chirped on his shoulder, and he chuckled and shook his head. “Goldie will be here too, okay?”
Blue still hesitated, but with Hector’s steady smile, her confidence began to grow again, until soon she was smiling too. “Y’know what? You’re right! They’re all a bunch of goose-butts for treating me like dirt, and we know that instead of believing them! Which makes us way better than their stupid proper-Goswish ways! So let’s go out there and show them that you don’t have to be perfect to be Goswish!”
Hector laughed and smiled with a bit of poorly-contained delight. “I’m glad to have you back Blue. And soon, we’ll be on our way to finding Crow, alright?”
Crow. Blue has almost forgotten why they were here. Somewhere within this city, her best friend was waiting for her. And if not, there would be the papers on where to find him. This alone gave her another small boost of confidence, and her smile grew at the thought of it.
“Alright. Thank you Hector. You’re a good big brother.”
Hector smiled again and took Blue’s hand in his, squeezing it reassuringly before they stepped back into the crowd.
One step closer to finding Crow.