Attention Esteemed Customers:
Due to the large number of concerns raised to Management, and in order to preserve Quark's as the pillar of community it has always been, all board and card games originating on Earth, also known as Terra, are banned until further notice.
For further information, please refer to our updated list of banned games and activities. Customers found in violation of this ban will have to pay a substantial fine.
Please send any question, inquiry or concern to the attached inbox below.
Kadis-kot is on thin ice. Tongo games will proceed as usual
Chief
Is this real? Can he do this?
BSisko
It is his establishment. As long as it isn't illegal, Quark can set as many rules he likes
I have never done an illegal thing in my life and I resent the implication captain
Chief
...
JDax
...
KiraN
...
JBashir
...
Doctor dont throw green stones at houses
JBashir
That was Vantika, not me, it doesn't count
Chief
Possession should be banned
I will get on that right away
That was sarcasm
Chief
no rly
BSisko
But I am curious, why a blanket ban on Earth games specifically?
Because they disturb the peace and order of my bar!!
Odo
...
They do! And it gets in the way of MY PROFITS! If you want hewmon games, open an arkeyde
Leeta
All of them? I mean, I know about the Twister Debacle, I was there, but not the others
BSisko
I'm still dealing with the paperwork for that one
JBashir
8 people had to come to the Infirmary
Odo
It was just a few extra arms. Solids are so delicate
Leeta
So? The others?
JDax
Risk because Julian and Miles broke a table on hour 10. Cluedo because Garak accused everyone at the bar of conspiracy to murder – remember that insurgent Andorian cell last month
G
and I was right. You're welcome
JDax
Let's see… Pandemic because no one needs another 6hour lecture on the difference between bacterial and viral infections, categorized by medium of transmission
JBashir
I said I was sorry
JDax
Scrabble because it's no fun when someone hacks into the UT to spell the longest Vulcan words they can find
JDax
Battleship because it got fused with the Holosuite that one time.
Chief
Ha, good times
JDax
Monopoly because Rom beat Quark
He STOLE from the BANK
Rom
Never ask when you can take?
Dont you quote the Rules of Acquisition back at me, have you no shame
Rom
But rule 1 says when you have the money…
Tough, moggie isn't here to take your side anymore
Chief
Calm down, it's just a game
JDax
Quark refused to use Monopoly money because it offended his sensibilities
Rom
You still owe me four strips of latinum, brother
They'll be coming out of your pay!!! For thievery!!!
JBashir
You know, that's just petty. After all, it wasn't a human board game that almost killed us.
JDax
Oooooh, yeah, that
KiraN
We are never talking about Allamaraine ever again
JBashir
But Major
KiraN
EVER
Chief
Ok, here's one I don't get. Why did the major get poker banned anyway
JBashir
Well, you see, the Intendant was really into strip poker
KiraN
Doctor I'll murder you and they wont find your body
JBashir
As the actress said to the bishop
KiraN
Brb
BSisko
If you murder him, you deal with the paperwork to ask Starfleet for another one
KiraN
Fine
JBashir
:P
KiraN
Can you be any more of a child
JDax
Oh, wait, Spin the Bottle isn't on the banned list
ALL hewmon board games. ALL
Leeta
Aw
JDax
We can play in my quarters ;)
JBashir
Can I join?
JDax
Sure. Anyone else? Rom?
Rom
Eeeeeee I don't know……
Rom are you a Ferengi or aren't you! Don't let yourself be hustled
JDax
Well, talk about being a party pooper
That's it
Keep spamming the inbox and I'll ban ALL hewmon games ever invented
Chief
If you ban darts, we're rioting. Julian?
JBashir
Seconded
Morn
...typing…
