Archive of Our Own

Alhaitham was typically a man of reason, never one to proceed without putting logical thought into his actions, always considerate of the outcomes. So, it became increasingly concerning and mildly aggravating that he had been unable to come up with a rational excuse for his recent behavior. 

His recent behavior towards Kaveh. His recent, rather alarming, obsessive behavior towards Kaveh. 

He recounts the little things, and then, the not-so-little things. 

Kaveh’s confused yet grateful smile when Alhaitham brewed him an extra cup of tea, rather than coffee, when he stayed up too late working on a project. Kaveh’s annoyed frown when Alhaitham interjects a conversation between him and a client that only Alhaitham thought was too handsy. The mini arguments Alhaitham instigated if only to keep Kaveh talking.  

Kaveh’s peaceful smile when Alhaitham absentmindedly caresses his hair while reading. Kaveh’s angered frown when Alhaitham takes advantage of his job and rejects funding for yet another one of Kaveh’s project proposals (he didn’t like the person Kaveh would have been working with, had he accepted the proposal). Alhaitham’s refusal to let up on their little game of “accidentally” taking Kaveh’s keys (he found that he quite liked the notion of making Kaveh wait for him). 

Kaveh’s confused half-smile, half-frown when Alhaitham drapes his coat over Kaveh’s body after Alhaitham noticed far too many wandering eyes. 

Alhaitham lets out an annoyed sigh as his thoughts began to run away from his book. He’s been doing that a lot more since he and Kaveh became… further acquainted. Since they became lovers. A small smile graces his lips, just barely. Lovers. Kaveh and him, lovers. 

“Haitham!” 

Alhaitham is struck out of his wandering thoughts by Kaveh’s loud call. He looks up from his book, which he hadn’t read a single word of, and is greeted by his lover (his lover) with his arms crossed, a scowl on his pretty face. 

“What is it?” Alhaitham hums absentmindedly, going back to the book, his attention remaining fully on Kaveh. His nose twitches. Kaveh’s muffled smell of Padisarah pollen before full bloom, introduces itself pleasantly. 

Kaveh’s face is red, his brows furrowed with annoyance, and his lips are tightly drawn, clearly displeased with Alhaitham’s dismissive attitude on top of whatever his initial anger was about. 

“Can you put that book down for one second?” Kaveh demands. Then, in a snide tone still filled with irritation, he continues, “I didn’t know you’re learning how to read upside down, too. Truly, you are a man of limitless thirst for knowledge.” 

Ah. Alhaitham sets the book down, his red ears thankfully covered by his earpiece. He clears his throat, trying to look undeterred, and instead turns to Kaveh with a raised brow. “It’s quite beneficial to challenge your mind every day, Kaveh. You should try it sometime.” 

“You—!” Kaveh’s red face grows redder. “You rude, rude Sage! Why must you pick a fight with me every time I try to be civil?!”

“I am not. It is a mere suggestion,” Alhaitham can’t help his lips quirking up slightly, “Besides… you started it.”

Kaveh huffs. He turns his head to the side dramatically, always one for theatrical flairs, and continues speaking with his nose in the air. “Whatever! That’s not the point. You have some answering to do, young man.” 

“What am I, your son?” Alhaitham mutters. 

“With how childish you’re acting, you might as well be!” Kaveh replies haughtily. 

“Childish? Me?” Alhaitham repeats with genuine confusion. He is called a lot of things. He is a man of many qualities, but… childish? Even during their petty arguments, Kaveh never calls him childish. It is a simply laughable attempt at an insult; so far from the truth, that it reflects a lack of skills towards Kaveh’s insulting abilities.  

“Yes, you!” Kaveh runs his hands through his hair, messing up the neat style and braids, almost knocking over his feather and causing his pins to clink against one another. 

All this, Alhaitham notices, yet he wants to see more. How are the pins arranged, now that Kaveh’s hair is messed up? Are they crooked now? Are they about to fall off? Is his braid loosened? Does it need to be rebraided? 

Alhaitham resists the urge to get up, or maybe to pull Kaveh down on the couch with him, and fix the now crooked feather. He ignores the way his fingers twitch, wanting to run through Kaveh’s hair and fix any tangled knots.

“Elaborate,” Alhaitham requests instead. 

“No, you elaborate!” Kaveh nearly yells. “Why don’t you elaborate on why you canceled my appointment with a client behind my back?! Do you know how long I’ve been waiting, looking like a pathetic fool who's been stood up? You jerk! You’ve always expressed your dislike for him, but I didn’t realize you were willing to go this far! Messing with my personal affairs like that— the nerve!”

Kaveh’s client… whom Alhaitham dislikes… To be honest, it takes Alhaitham a moment to recall the person. Alhaitham’s list of people he dislikes, for some coincidental reason, is nearly identical to Kaveh’s client list. A man’s face pops into Alhaitham’s mind. Sourly, he frowns. 

“Oh.”

“Oh?!” Kaveh repeats, seething red. “That’s all you have to say? Oh ? That could’ve been the deal of my life, Haitham! That could’ve gotten me out of my debt, you impossible little—! Argh!” 

“Rajavi the merchant,” Alhaitham recalls unpleasantly, his frown deepening. “Kaveh, I thought you weren’t foolish enough to readily accept yet another scam.”

“Not this again! I keep telling you, he’s not trying to scam me! Wait…” Kaveh frowns, eyes narrowing. “You’re calling me a fool?” 

Alhaitham ignores the question. “After you finished the Palace of Alcazazaray for Lord Sangemah Bay, you managed to accumulate a vast debt.” 

Predictably, Kaveh flushes, suddenly looking very defensive. He hunches his shoulders, closing his hands into fists. “Wha— what’s that got to do with—”

“And now,” Alhaitham interrupts sharply. “You are about to make a contract with yet another conniving merchant. Really, have you learned nothing from your past mistakes? Or are you simply hoping I will support your financial complications this time around?” 

“Th-that,” Kaveh splutters, turning redder and redder by the minute, “You—! That’s not true! Rajavi is a well-respected merchant who’s just very appreciative of the arts, unlike you! You don’t understand the— the majestical intricacies of the Palace I built. He does! You know, every time I visit the Palace, just to admire it as its designer, he’s always there, admiring it also! Now, Haitham, how does that scream ‘scammer’ to you?!”  

Alhaitham sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose. “I am both surprised yet not that you don’t know the true reason. The reason he is always outside the palace is because he wants to conjoin businesses with the merchant of Alcazararay. He came to you, I presume, to build his own castle and make a name for himself as well.”

“That’s a big, fat lie!” Kaveh denies adamantly. “We had several chats and he’s always complimenting the Palace. The way he compliments its design, its aura, its beauty… there’s no way it’s all a lie!”

Something unpleasant sits in Alhaitham’s stomach as Kaveh recounts his and Rajavi’s conversations. He decides he doesn’t like the image of Kaveh sitting down with a man, a man that’s not Alhaitham (or, he supposes, Tighnari and Cyno), and bonding over a shared interest that Alhaitham can’t comprehend the same way. He doesn’t like the idea of some stranger blatantly complimenting Kaveh and flattering him, making Kaveh smile his bright smile, making Kaveh happy.  

“That is the issue, my dear,” Alhaitham murmurs, ignoring the pit of dread forming deep in his heart. “You are easily swayed by flattery.”

Kaveh’s angered agitation turns into surprised flusteredness at the casual pet name. “N-no I’m not, you jerk!” 

“I’m only looking out for you as your… your lover,” Alhaitham continues. He smirks at Kaveh’s reaction, enjoying the way the fight seems to leave Kaveh, and instead leaving him an extremely flustered, blushing mess. Now that is a much prettier image.  

“What—” Kaveh’s shoulders slump. “What do you think you’re doing?”

“Kaveh,” Alhaitham presses on, his tone gentle but not exactly soft; stern yet concerned. “Forget Rajavi. He’s no good for you or your career.” 

Kaveh laughs, although the sound comes out nervous and forced. He crosses his arms, a feeble attempt to reestablish confidence. “What’s this? You almost sound jealous.” 

“I am,” Alhaitham admits. “I’m jealous that a fake such as Rajavi is admired by you. I’m jealous that someone who will surely take advantage of you gets to eat and converse with you as if he’s worthy of your time and attention.”  

“Wha—” Kaveh’s smile falls as he brings his hands up to his face and groans into his palms. He refuses to meet Alhaitham’s intrigued gaze and instead opts to hide his red cheeks. “Alhaitham! You— you’re so insufferable! Ugh! We— we’ll discuss this later, you… you idiot!” 

With that, Kaveh stomps away, muttering a storm under his breath. Alhaitham catches a few unsavory insults in his name, but he takes no offense. Instead, he lets out a small laugh at Kaveh’s adorable reaction. Next time Kaveh speaks a bit too much, Alhaitham knows what to say to shut the architect up. 

“Next time—” Kaveh yells from the other room, his voice muffled through the walls and just loud enough to be coherent, “—don’t mess around behind my back! Tell me first, you Haravatat fool!” 

Next time, was the translation, I’ll listen to your concerns if you would just talk to me. 

Alhaitham continues to sit on the couch, picking up his book (right side up now) and flipping to where he last left off. He dares not give into the urge to follow after Kaveh, to pry Kaveh’s hands away from his face so Alhaitham can see those beautifully crimson cheeks. Not when Kaveh’s mad at him.

Alhaitham sighs. Control, he reminds himself. He needs to control himself and these feelings. These overwhelming feelings for Kaveh. Control. Rein in. 

Today, Kaveh managed to cool down. Today, Kaveh forgave Alhaitham, evident by his wildfire blushes and admitting defeat by being the first to leave. Tomorrow, he may find Alhaitham overbearing, overwhelming. 

Tomorrow, he may leave Alhaitham. And Alhaitham isn't quite sure how he would proceed, live even. 

Control.

i. autumn leaves wither for eternity

The first time they had sex, Alhaitham was the inexperienced one. 

Kaveh was patient—at least, more so than usual—and repeatedly stressed how important it was to be careful. The importance of using condoms, the importance of stretching first, and the importance of using oil to make the activity more pleasant than painful for the one taking the role as the bottom. 

At first, they disagreed about who should be on top. Even in the intimacy of the act, the two couldn’t seem to stop arguing with one another. Always one thing or another. In hindsight, it was an almost endearing quirk of their relationship. In the moment, however, it was plain torture to prolong what Alhaitham waited years for. 

Alhaitham insisted that he should take the lead as the taller, bigger one. The idea made perfect logical sense to him. Nevermind the fact he only has barely a few inches on Kaveh— his build is much more muscular and broader than Kaveh’s. 

Kaveh scoffed and told him that height and build are not the only factors in topping. Really, this just goes to show how inexperienced Alhaitham was. As Alhaitham’s senior, Kaveh should take the lead and teach Alhaitham.

Alhaitham shook his head stubbornly. Inexperience had never stopped him from learning on his own, honing his skills on his own. So Alhaitham amended himself by heavily insinuating he’s the more manly of the two. And isn’t that a major factor in the top’s quality? 

Absolutely not, you brute! Kaveh smacked him for that. His cheeks flushed, he had said he is very manly, thank you very much. Then, Kaveh opened his mouth like he always does, and said the words that stabbed Alhaitham’s very heart (no he wasn’t being dramatic).

“Out of the two of us, who’s actually fucked other people?” 

Kaveh probably thought that was a sound argument. He probably thought it supported his thesis that the more experienced person should be on top. He probably had no idea the effect it had on Alhaitham.

But the thought of Kaveh embracing other men, touching other men beyond friendship, letting anyone except Alhaitham see what’s beneath his teasing clothes, infuriated Alhaitham. Instead of blood, jealousy coursed through his body. He harshly grabbed hold of Kaveh’s slim hips and kissed him fiercely. A fire lit in his eyes, and he growled out—

“Never mention other men when we’re fucking.” 

Kaveh gasped and quickly succumbed to Alhaitham’s rough yet passionate administration. He didn’t object to the unfolding events, gladly allowing Alhaitham to take the lead despite his previous statements. 

The first time they had sex, Alhaitham didn’t let his inexperience stop him from taking what’s his.  

Kaveh’s late. 

Alhaitham sits at the dining room table, a warm cup of coffee in front of him. His book, an advanced guide on ancient Liyuen technology, lies next to the coffee, abandoned as well. His arms are crossed, and his expression holds a weird balance of annoyance and concern. He’s glaring at the painting across the wall, the painting full of colors that mixed in meaningless ways, holding no particular shape. 

(When Alhaitham questioned whether or not a paint spill should be called ‘art,’ Kaveh had turned red from anger. The following hour-long rant was like music to Alhaitham’s ears; literally, because he eventually turned on some music to tune Kaveh out. When he turned the music off, Kaveh was in the middle of rambling about radishes, and Alhaitham is still unsure to this day how art and radishes correlate. Perhaps Kaveh is passionate about radishes. Dubbing anything, anyone, "art" is the highest compliment an artist can give, after all.) 

It’s not rare that Kaveh goes to the tavern after a successful appointment with a client. Often, Alhaitham would go and find Kaveh, pay for his tab, and take the drunk architect home. That is not a rare occurrence, and Alhaitham quite enjoys taking care of Kaveh in his drunken stupor.

But it’s different this time. Alhaitham glares at the unsightly painting harder, as if pinning all his problems on the damn thing. It’s different because they’re lovers now. 

Kaveh hasn’t gone out since the day Alhaitham confessed. He has stayed by Alhaitham’s side ever since that day and only drank during their weekly hangouts with Tighnari and Cyno. Maybe a couple cups when his work gets stressful. But, again, that's at home.  

Alhaitham grits his teeth. So what’s different now? Why has Kaveh decided now is a good time to go out, get drunk, and… and… 

Alhaitham’s mind supplies him with vivid images of Kaveh, alcohol’s blush painting his supple cheeks, his blond hair frayed and messed up in a seductive manner, his lithe body pressed against a faceless stranger. Kaveh’s flowing sleeves, his shirt lopsided to reveal his shoulders. The ever-so-low cut of his shirt’s collar, blessing anyone with a sight of his silk-smooth skin. Kaveh smiling sensually at someone that’s not Alhaitham. 

Alhaitham stands up abruptly. His coffee is cold. His expression is stone-cold. Everything feels cold. His vision glows dangerously hot against his coat. The juxtaposition, the contrast of biting cold and scathing heat, makes his head spin. 

Before he can stop to rationally think things over, Alhaitham’s already hastily slamming the door behind him. 

The brisk walk to the local tavern is over in a flash as Alhaitham’s mind continues to conjure alluring images of Kaveh, drunk Kaveh, defenseless Kaveh, enticing Kaveh, Kaveh, Kaveh, Kaveh.   

Alhaitham opens the tavern door and is greeted with the loud, cheerful ambiance of the tavern. The strong smell of alcohol and food attacks his nose. He quickly scans the room until his eyes land on Kaveh, who stands out like gold in a coal mine. Like Celestia in a city full of light. 

Alhaitham lets out a tiny sigh. There he is. 

The person next to Kaveh, probably a former classmate from the Akademiya, notices Alhaitham and flags him over with a smile. 

Alhaitham huffs to himself. What is he, a dog? Nonetheless, he trudges forward only for Kaveh.

“—veh, Kaveh, Alhaitham is here,” the person laughs breathlessly, nudging Kaveh. 

“Hm?” Kaveh replies, his half-lidded eyes landing on Alhaitham. Immediately, his expression brightens, and he smiles a wide, happy grin. 

Alhaitham’s heart pounds in his chest. 

“Haitham!” 

“How drunk are you?” Alhaitham murmurs, taking Kaveh into his arms. Kaveh easily allows it, melting into Alhaitham’s arms like ice under a blaring sun. The way Kaveh effortlessly trusts Alhaitham, even when sloppily drunk out of his mind, makes Alhaitham want to melt as well. 

“Mmm,” Kaveh nuzzles his nose against Alhaitham’s neck. His lips, wet from alcohol and maybe saliva, rub against his collarbone sloppily. Alhaitham's mouth twitches, unable to decide whether to smile or frown. Love and fondness battles with annoyance and distaste. 

“What…” Alhaitham moves Kaveh’s lips away from his skin with a fake-annoyed sigh. He eyes the person with a slight glare as if daring him to judge them. “Kaveh, you’re drunk.”

“No ‘m not,” Kaveh slurs. He laughs at nothing, Alhaitham’s clothes muffling the sound. His weak hands clasp Alhaitham’s shoulder, anchoring himself to Alhaitham. The gesture makes Alhaitham’s heart swell.  

Alhaitham gives the man—he still doesn’t know his name—a pained look. “I apologize, I must take him away now. It seems Kaveh is far too drunk.”

The man laughs. “It’s no problem, Sir Sage. I hope he doesn’t throw up too badly in your house.”

Alhaitham pauses. Kaveh was always adamant about keeping their rooming situation a secret. For some reason, the idea of their roommate status being a publicly known fact was terrifying to him. While Alhaitham doesn’t quite understand the issue, he shall oblige to Kaveh’s wishes. 

“He won’t be anywhere near my home,” Alhaitham lies easily, “I’m taking him to his house.”

Kaveh lets out a muffled whine.

The emphasis didn’t escape the man. Surprise colors his face. “His house? I thought…”

Alhaitham places a hand on Kaveh’s head to keep the drunk man still. “What is it?”

“Well,” the man chuckles, almost nervously, “from the way Kaveh’s been talking about you all day… I just thought that you guys lived together… my apologies for assuming.” 

Alhaitham tries not to let his shock show. Kaveh talks about him? Even when drunk out of his mind? He huffs, turning around to hide the small grin fighting to take place. “An illogical practice of assumption. What you heard was nothing but a drunk man’s nonsensical prattle, I’m sure. Don’t think anything of it.” 

Carefully, he unclasps his coat and wraps it around Kaveh. Alhaitham drinks in the way his coat seems to swallow Kaveh whole, wrapping around his thinner frame quite beautifully. A perfect showcase of possession. 

The man says something, his words lost in the bar as Alhaitham tunes him out. He leads Kaveh out the tavern, aware of every pair of eyes on them. He feels intruding eyes scrutinizing the way his arm wraps around Kaveh’s waist, the way Kaveh leans against him affectionately, the way Kaveh sniffs Alhaitham’s coat around him, a smile of familiarity on his red face. The way Alhaitham’s hold on Kaveh tightens, the way his harsh eyes soften every time he glances at Kaveh. 

Alhaitham’s sending a soundless message, and everyone in the tavern is aware, taking the message with silent, curious eyes. 

Whispers arise as jealous eyes watch, and Alhaitham smugly takes Kaveh to their home. 

Mine, his loving hold on Kaveh’s waist declares. 

Mine, his tender smile at Kaveh’s drunken caresses announces. 

All mine, their domestic walk sighs dreamily, as Kaveh snuggles into Alhaitham’s beloved cape. 

. . .

The next day, Kaveh arrives home early from his hang-out with Tighnari, eyes confused and slightly panicked. He seeks out Alhaitham first, forgoing anything else, which pleases the Sage indescribably. He likes the idea of being first on Kaveh’s priority list. 

“Alhaitham,” Kaveh nearly whispers in mortification. His face is turning red, and Alhaitham can't decipher if it's from anger or embarrassment. “What happened last night?”

“You were drunk, so I took you home. As always.” Alhaitham sips his coffee to hide his small, pleased smile. 

“What?” Kaveh asks, a look of defeat on his crestfallen face. Alhaitham thinks that such a devastating expression shouldn’t look so pretty on a man. “What… what else?” 

“Nothing else happened, I assure you.”

“Nothing else? Then why’s everyone calling you my husband?!”

Alhaitham pauses, taking in Kaveh’s words. “Huh…” 

“Don’t just huh me!!” 

Alhaitham decides he likes husband much more than boyfriend.  

ii. winter snow takes away the dust from the earth

The morning after they had sex for the first time, Alhaitham thought everything was simply empyreal. Heavenly. Divine. Celestial. Exactly like Kaveh . 

Alhaitham woke up first, the previous night’s exhaustion sated from his blissfully peaceful sleep. Kaveh’s arms were wrapped around Alhaitham’s bare chest. His hair was a mess, and Alhaitham allowed himself to gently push the strands back. The gesture was incredibly domestic. It made him smile to himself. 

Kaveh’s body was littered with marks and bites, and Alhaitham felt awfully proud of himself for his handiwork. Not bad for a virgin. Take that, Kaveh. 

He carefully untangled Kaveh’s limbs, shuffling out of the tight hold while trying not to wake the sleeping man up. When Alhaitham finally succeeded, he got dressed and fixed himself for the day before heading to the kitchen. 

Alhaitham often made breakfast for the both of them, and Kaveh would wake up later and join him at the kitchen table. By the time Kaveh was awake, the food would just be shimmering down, accompanied by a chilled cup of coffee. Kaveh would often complain about the temperature; too cold to enjoy, but still warm enough he can’t complain about it. He would complain anyway, and Alhaitham would simply rebut that he should wake up earlier, or cook his own breakfast. 

That morning, he decided to bring the breakfast to Kaveh. 

Kaveh’s bright smile, upon waking up to the aroma of hot food and hot coffee was all worth it. 

Alhaitham took a mental picture of the scene before him—Kaveh, hastily dressed in Alhaitham’s too-large shirt slipping off his shoulders (inside out as well; that’s just too endearing), grinning with satisfaction as he happily stuffed his face with food—and engraved it deep in his memories. 

Maybe Alhaitham should bring him breakfast in bed more often. 

(The following crumbs on his bed, which Kaveh half-assedly cleaned up, were enough to make Alhaitham second guess himself. Nevermind, he decided as he disdainfully stared at his messy, crumbly bed. I shouldn’t spoil Kaveh too much. He is a grown man, after all...)

“You know, after we got together, I had hoped you’d be nicer to me,” Kaveh remarks one domestic day, with his back leaning against Alhaitham’s arms. They’re sitting on their couch, Alhaitham reading a book as Kaveh idly sketches lazy blueprints with slightly messed up proportions due to his position.  

Alhaitham lowers his book and glances down at Kaveh. He opens his mouth to reply, but he sees that Kaveh isn’t quite done speaking, so he lets out a hum instead. Silently beckoning Kaveh to continue as his thoughts whir in his head. 

“Especially with that breakfast-in-bed stunt,” Kaveh continues. He laughs to himself before he grows serious again. “That was surprisingly sweet of you. I half thought you got possessed.”

Alhaitham quirks his eyebrows. “I… wasn’t.” 

“Maybe the sex was so good, your mind got fried,” Kaveh jokes as he turns to look at Alhaitham, curious to see his lover’s reaction. He grows red when he sees that Alhaitham is seriously considering the notion. “That was a joke, Haitham! A joke. Stop making that face!”   

“Hmpf. If it’s for you, I can be sweet,” Alhaitham murmurs. He sets his book down and shifts to face Kaveh, chuckling as Kaveh complains at the sudden movement messing up his comfortable spot. Alhaitham hikes his legs up on the couch, encasing Kaveh. He puts his arms around either side of Kaveh and clasps them together in the middle, wrapping him in a loose hug. 

The tips of Kaveh’s ears are red, Alhaitham notices. He wishes he could see Kaveh’s face. It’s probably just as red. Maybe his cheeks are puffed, like Kaveh sometimes does when he’s flustered.

“No,” Kaveh mumbles, leaning back into Alhaitham’s chest. He sighs peacefully and looks up at Alhaitham with a small smile on his face. His sketchbook lies forgotten in front of them. “It was almost scary seeing you be so nice.”

Alhaitham’s brows furrow. He repeats slowly, “Scary…?”

Kaveh laughs. “Yes. I’ve always known you to be the antagonist. Seeing you be nice is like seeing… uh… oh I don’t know, seeing you without a book.”

“That’s absurd.” Alhaitham’s frown deepens. “Do you really think of me like that?”

Kaveh shrugs. “You’re always mean to me, though,” Kaveh accuses, “why’re you acting all mopey? You do realize that you’re the one that starts ninety percent of our arguments? And because I happen to be the loud one, everyone thinks I’m the troublemaker! And you don’t even stop them! You just let them think so terribly of me, you scheming bastard.” 

Alhaitham hangs his head on the crevice of Kaveh’s neck. He murmurs softly into the embrace, his voice soft and deep, “I only indulge in our arguments because I love hearing your voice. I’m weak to the utterly captivating passion in your voice.” 

Kaveh’s body stills. Slowly, he buries his head in his hands, letting out a strangled noise as if Alhaitham had choked him. “You—! You’re always saying such— such things! I can’t believe you…” 

“Whatever do you mean?” Alhaitham teases lightly. He takes Kaveh’s wrists gently and pushes them away. “Don’t hide. Let me see you.” 

“You…” Kaveh mumbles. He glares up weakly at Alhaitham. “Out of the both of us, one would expect me to be the sappy romantic one.”

“You are.”

“W-well, yeah!” Kaveh crosses his arms. A pout sits on his lips and Alhaitham smiles in the crook of Kaveh’s neck. “Of course I’ll be romantic! I am romance!”

“Bold claim.”

“Shush, you! But, anyway, yes I’m romantic, yet somehow you’re always— always usurping me! It’s ridiculous!” Kaveh complains. He suddenly gets up, turns around, and takes Alhaitham’s cheeks in his hands, cupping them angrily. “It’s like you’re competing with me, or something. Ever so competitive man. How dare you! J-just give me this one thing, will you?” 

“I… don’t follow,” Alhaitham frowns through his squished cheeks. He half-heartedly swats Kaveh’s hands away, not really wanting his lover to stop. He quite likes the feel of Kaveh’s softly calloused hands on his face, being cupped like Kaveh wants to kiss him. 

“For such a rude man, you’re awfully romantic,” Kaveh elaborates. “When you compliment me all of a sudden, I get very flustered because you’re not supposed to do that! I’m so used to you being a grumpy old man that… that when you say— gah!”

Kaveh abruptly stops talking to hide his face in his hands again. Alhaitham immediately misses Kaveh’s warm hands. Kaveh continues, his speech muffled. “It’s just so jarring.” 

“Do you want me to stop?” 

“Stop… what?” Kaveh peeks up at him curiously.

Alhaitham flicks Kaveh’s hair. “Stop complimenting you. Even if I mean everything with complete sincerity, if it bothers you, I simply won’t voice my honest opinions.”

Kaveh shakes his head. “Y-you don’t have to stop if you don’t want to.” He raises his head and looks up almost bashfully. “I… I like it when you say those things anyway. It’s… it’s different, but it’s not bad-different.”  

My, what a picture. Alhaitham feels possessiveness take over him once again, at the man before him. Kaveh’s bashful eyes, his flustered face, an expression no one except Alhaitham will ever see. A version of Kaveh that’s not loud and confident, a version of Kaveh that’s silent and yearning, full of nervous love. This version of Kaveh is one only for Alhaitham. 

“Good. I have no intention of stopping.” Alhaitham smiles. “Then, would you like for me to stop instigating arguments? Stop being so ‘mean,’ as you say.” 

“No, no,” Kaveh shakes his head vigorously, his tone slightly panicked. Alhaitham raises a brow at the interesting reaction. “No, that… that, I’m used to. So it’s okay too.” 

Alhaitham’s lips quirk up slightly. “You’re used to it? Well, that won’t do. I should be nicer to my lover, hm?” 

Kaveh lets out a panicked whine. “N-no! I— it’s okay, Haitham, really. You’re scary when you’re nice, remember? So don’t!” 

“So, do you want me to be nice or mean?”

Silence. Kaveh’s face is red. 

Alhaitham smiles, nudging Kaveh. “Admit it.” 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” 

Kaveh knows exactly what Alhaitham’s talking about, if the red of his face to the flustered daze overtaking his eyes is anything to go by. His nervously quivering lips, the way his shoulders tightened, his brows furrowed expectantly. Alhaitham greedily drinks in the sight, heat pooling deep in his stomach. 

“You like it when I’m mean, don’t you?” Alhaitham smirks. Just as he hopes, Kaveh’s already red face turns an even angrier shade of red. 

Kaveh’s breath hitches. “I’m—! Haitham! No I don’t! I hate it, actually, you fool. I hate it.”  

“You’re mewling,” Alhaitham teases. “Speak clearly, Kaveh.” 

“You are such an asshole,” Kaveh whines, turning his nose upward. The gesture is ruined by his delicately blushing face, betrayed by the smile slowly spreading across his cheeks. 

“You like it anyway.” Alhaitham leans forward. He’ll graciously allow Kaveh distraction from the obviously embarrassing conversation, but there’s no way he’d just let it go like this. He decides to file the information for later. Kaveh likes it when Alhaitham’s mean. 

Kaveh huffs out a fake sigh. He rolls his eyes, and Alhaitham follows the movement intently, watching the way Kaveh’s crimson ruby eyes move. He feels like a cat hopelessly, devotedly, chasing after a laser. 

“Whatever,” Kaveh meets Alhaitham halfway with an ever-so-present smile. His arms hang comfortably atop Alhaitham’s shoulders, embracing him in a loose hold. 

The kiss they share is tender, full of yearning and promises, love entangling with their dancing tongues. Alhaitham groans into the kiss, and his hand snakes up Kaveh’s backside, holding his lover possessively. Kaveh subtly leans back into the embrace, allowing Alhaitham’s large hands to support him. 

“I love you,” Kaveh murmurs into Alhaitham’s lips. His eyes are closed, his expression soft and simply ethereal. 

Alhaitham’s hands still for a moment as he relishes the way the Kaveh says it so naturally, as if he’s always meant to say I love you to Alhaitham. He relishes the way three simple words shake his entire being. He feels hot, and his heart constricts with utter love for Kaveh. He wants to say it back, he wants Kaveh to know, but his throat constricts. 

The four-worded reply doesn’t exit his lips, but the way his hands hold Kaveh even tighter, even more possessive, the way his kiss turns rough with want, says everything for him. And Kaveh doesn’t mind, Alhaitham speculates, from the way he turns breathless, letting out little noises that draw the carnal side of Alhaitham out. 

They didn’t bother moving to the bedroom.

Kaveh’s hands are warm, and his smile burns brighter. 

I love you too, Alhaitham whispers back through his actions, through his rapid but steady and lovingly gentle thrusts. Through the kisses he peppers every inch of Kaveh’s body with, through the way he holds Kaveh like he’s daring Celestia to try and tear them apart. Perhaps, just perhaps, the fire in his eyes chants out just loud enough for anyone watching carefully, I love you more. 

iii. spring rain nourishes the soils and roots  

After the first time they had sex, Alhaitham wanted more. He wanted a second time, a third time, a fourth, a fifth. A twentieth. Thirty. A hundred. More, more, more. 

Alhaitham wanted more of Kaveh, more of everything Kaveh has to offer. He wanted to kiss Kaveh until the architect eventually stop him with a furiously red face, he wanted to hold Kaveh until Kaveh indignantly push him away. He wanted more of Kaveh, he wanted to take more and more until he's unable to. 

He wanted to stay in bed with Kaveh forever, but he knew that was an illogical want. Alhaitham is not a man that indulges in meaningless wants, but he wanted to anyway. 

Alhaitham wanted— wants —more of Kaveh. The feelings he put away, the feelings of longing that festered for years before they finally shared a kiss are deep and hungry. A nearly overwhelming feeling of wanting, as if he’s struck with the weight of a thousand canned knowledge capsules on love and want, need and hunger, the exhilarating madness of pure lust. 

More, more, more. 

After the first time they had sex, Kaveh gave him such a sweet smile, warm and soft and radiant in the way diamond sparkles and flashes, glowing as if blessed by the Goddess of Flowers, that Alhaitham knew he’s allowed to indulge, just a little bit. 

More, he wanted more. His kisses, his tight grasps, his gestures, his everything all ask a silent question: Can I take more? 

Here, Kaveh’s smile allowed, permitted without a single word uttered aloud. Take as much as you want. 

When Tighnari spots Alhaitham’s slow arrival, a look of panic crosses his face. It seems he kicked Kaveh under the table, given the way Kaveh suddenly jolts up in pain and Tighnari’s guilty, apologetic expression. Kaveh turns around and makes eye contact with Alhaitham, and his expression mirrors Tighnari’s panic before relaxing once he spies Alhaitham’s headpiece being in use. 

Alhaitham raises an eyebrow as he draws closer to the table. He takes off his soundproof headpiece just in time to catch Tighnari’s greeting. 

“—Haitham, you’re finally here. How’s the Akademiya?” Tighnari gives him a polite, somewhat strained smile. His eyes are shooting glares at Kaveh. Next to him, Cyno has a look of disappointed curiosity, as if he was looking forward to a fight between Alhaitham and Tighnari, or perhaps Kaveh.  

It’s clear that Kaveh had been raving on and on about Alhaitham prior to his entrance. It’s not all that uncommon, really. Whenever Alhaitham arrives late to their hangouts (his job is frustratingly demanding lately), he always arrives in time to hear Kaveh complain about him. Tighnari and Cyno never made any attempts to stop Kaveh previously. Usually, Tighnari and Cyno share shit-eating grins with one another as they're about to witness Kaveh making a fool of himself about Alhaitham, unaware of Alhaitham's arrival. 

So what’s different this time? Sourly, Alhaitham notes that this isn’t the first time he asks himself that very question. 

“The Akademiya is alright,” Alhaitham answers as he takes a seat next to Kaveh. He eyes his lover, who suddenly looks suspiciously guilty. “Don’t let me interrupt. Please, carry on with your conversation.” 

Sarcasm drips off of his tongue, which the others ignore politely. 

“We were just talking about,” Kaveh purses his lips, lost in thought. He not-very-subtly signals help from Tighnari. “...About…” 

“TCG,” Tighnari says quickly. He elbows Cyno, who jostles at the sudden movement. He begins shuffling the cards that were previously limp in his hands. 

“We are playing Genius Invocation TCG,” Cyno announces robotically. 

Alhaitham nods, not very convinced. “And surely not gossiping about me.” 

“Of course not, you’re not that special,” Kaveh laughs nervously at the same time Tighnari says, 

“He was complaining about you beating him every round.” 

The two shoot each other blank looks. Cyno snorts behind the cards he’s shuffling. Alhaitham wonders if they think of him as an idiot. 

“Y-yes,” Kaveh concedes, his cheeks an angry red. “Talking about TCG. You beating me. Yup.”

Alhaitham decides to graciously let this moment go. He doesn’t want to embarrass his lover any longer after all, even if Kaveh’s nervous squirming and sweating pink cheeks are an adorable sight. Tighnari and Cyno shouldn’t see this side of Kaveh. Only Alhaitham should be allowed to see this version of Kaveh. 

“Why don’t we refine Kaveh’s TCG skills with a new round, hm?” Alhaitham steals Kaveh’s cup of wine and takes a sip. Kaveh scowls as he tries to take his cup back, but Alhaitham moves back with a smile. 

The wine is sweet and sharp, quenching the thirst he didn’t know he had. He can’t help but compare the wine to Kaveh. Sweet and sharp, quenching the thirst he didn’t know he had. 

Cyno beams excitedly as Tighnari sighs in exasperation. Relief colors his eyes as he gives Kaveh a thumbs up. Kaveh returns the gesture and Alhaitham is starting to get offended by how ignorant they seem to think he is. 

The group lasts three and a half games of Genius Invocation TCG before Kaveh finally calls it quits. He throws down his support cards, all of them garbage, and angrily glares at his dice, all of them also garbage. 

Cyno cackles as he declares himself the winner, with all three of his character cards still standing. Compared to him, Kaveh’s sole survivor only has two health points. Tighnari’s two characters are also on the brink of death, while Alhaitham sat out for the last round (Kaveh had complained loudly that the two were ganging up on him during their three-way-TCG round, and no one denied his accusations because they all knew it was true).

“I believe it’s time to go home.” Alhaitham nudges Kaveh. Kaveh blinks in surprise but doesn’t object.   

“Already?” Tighnari’s eyebrows furrow. His ears twitch slightly. 

“I am exhausted,” Alhaitham lies, “and would like to rest soon. I apologize for cutting our time short.”

“Oh, no, that’s okay. Rest is important,” Tighnari smiles, shaking his head. He gives Kaveh a knowing smile, and his wise eyes mutter a message Alhaitham can’t decipher. Alhaitham tries to ignore the stirring jealousy that pools deep in his stomach. It’s illogical, irrational. So what if Kaveh and Tighnari are speaking a language he, a Haravatat graduate, doesn’t understand? 

Tighnari stands up. “Allow me to have a word with Kaveh, then you can go on your merry way, alright?” 

Alhaitham stills, his expression unreadable. He shrugs, pretending to be unbothered. “Go ahead.” 

Tighnari whisks a confused Kaveh away. Alhaitham watches them carefully, his expression stony, as he opts to reading Tighnari’s lips, unable to hear them. 

Communicate, Tighnari’s lips said.   

Kaveh’s back is turned to Alhaitham, but Alhaitham watches the way Kaveh’s shoulders slump in defeated acceptance.

Tighnari shakes his head. You need to tell him. 

Tell whom, what? Alhaitham frowns. Him? 

“Stop glaring at Tighnari,” Cyno speaks up from his seat. Alhaitham reluctantly shifts his questioning gaze from Kaveh and Tighnari to Cyno. 

“I am not.” 

Cyno ignores him, shrugging as he begins to shuffle his cards. “You have nothing to be jealous of, Kaveh is all yours.” 

“I am not jealous,” Alhaitham frowns further. Him, jealous? Maybe of Kaveh’s annoying clients, but of Tighnari? What an absurd idea. He half wonders if this is a setup to another one of Cyno’s terrible jokes.  

“Who do you think you’re fooling?” Cyno shakes his head. “You are pretty transparent when it comes to your boyfriend, you know. Anyone can tell.” 

“You are simply looking into something that does not require your attention,” Alhaitham insists stubbornly. “I am not a jealous person. To be jealous is to fear someone taking Kaveh away. I have the utmost trust in him. No, I am not afraid Kaveh may run off to another person, especially not your partner. In fact, I find the idea thoroughly farcical.” 

“Then, you’re territorial?” Cyno suggests as he stares at Alhaitham. He meets his eyes with a cynical smile, a frown in disguise. There’s something akin to frustrated pain in his eyes, but the General Mahamatra remains calm and collected. “That’s almost as funny as one of my jokes.” 

Alhaitham’s left eye twitches. 

“Haitham!” Kaveh calls from the front of the tavern. “Hurry up!” 

Alhaitham gets up, his ears red underneath his headpiece, and his face blank to mask the displeasure of being figured out. 

“Your jokes were never funny to begin with.”

On the way home, Alhaitham’s thoughts flurry to and fro as he wonders what Tighnari was talking about. What vexes Kaveh about Alhaitham. What they need to communicate. Why Kaveh and Tighnari were so reluctant to let Alhaitham know what they were talking about, even though Kaveh always preferred to loudly complain about Alhaitham. 

Kaveh is silent. Alhaitham frowns at the quietness; silence and Kaveh are not associates even in dire situations. Even in sleep. Even when dutifully working on architectural plans late at night. Only when Kaveh’s deeply troubled about something, and is mustering the nerves to do something about it.

Alhaitham is not a man that gives into fear, but in that moment, he feels as if time has slowed down and his chest finds it difficult to squeeze his heart.   

The walk home is cold and stiff. 

When they arrive home, neither attempts to make the first move to go to bed. 

“Haitham.” Kaveh turns his carmine eyes on Alhaitham, a look of hesitance on his usually enthusiastic face. “Let’s talk.” 

“Sure,” Alhaitham replies nonchalantly. 

Kaveh smiles, a small smile that doesn’t reach its usual brightness. Still, it’s gentle and comforting as his eyes soften. It’s beautiful. It eases Alhaitham’s tension just by a bit. “It’s nothing bad, stupid. Stop looking so rigid.” 

Oh. The stillness in Alhaitham’s heart flutters ever so slightly. 

“I’ll make some coffee. Gather your thoughts thoroughly,” Alhaitham says comfortingly, coaxingly. He jerks his chin towards their couch, silently telling Kaveh to sit down.

Kaveh’s smile grows. “Bring me a cup. Two scoops of sugar.” 

“Mhm.” 

“Thank you,” Kaveh says so quietly, Alhaitham almost misses it. 

The coffee is just an excuse, honestly. Despite Kaveh’s reassurance, Alhaitham needs a moment to himself to collect his thoughts, to think things through logically, and to not be an emotional conclusion-jumper. That’s Kaveh’s job. He needs to be sensible. 

When he rejoins Kaveh with two cups of coffee in his hand, his expression is trained into stoicism. His headpieces are tucked away, left behind in the kitchen. 

“Well?” Alhaitham asks, never one to beat around the bush and wait restlessly. He needs to know what Kaveh’s thinking, he needs Kaveh to confirm they’re okay. That this conversation will not turn sour and haunt him forever. 

Kaveh raises an eyebrow, and it’s clear he came to the correct conclusion. “Um… well, let’s see. How do I start this…” 

“You can start with what Tighnari told you,” Alhaitham suggests. 

Kaveh’s mouth drops open. “You— you heard that?!”

“I didn’t hear it, but I gathered that it had something to do with me. About you and I,” Alhaitham says quietly. “You are not exactly subtle, Kaveh.”

Kaveh looks away, face red. “W-whatever. Well then. I was complaining to Tighnari and Cyno about you.” 

“I know.” Alhaitham nods. 

“And not because you keep beating me in TCG!” 

“...I know .” Alhaitham is beginning to feel insulted again. 

Kaveh’s shoulders slump as he leans back on the couch. His coffee sloshes, and Alhaitham’s eyes zeroed in on the way Kaveh’s coffee is dangerously close to his chest. Always so careless, he thinks distantly, and he's not sure if he's thinking about the almost-spilled coffee or something else, someone else. 

“Be careful,” Alhaitham tells him, taking the cup gently. “Do not fret. Take your time, Kaveh. I will listen to you dutifully so, please, do not worry about upsetting me.” 

Kaveh’s cheeks are red again. “That— Haitham, I don’t know how you can be such an aloof brute, yet utter such sappy nonsense!” 

“It’s not nonsense.” Alhaitham frowns. “It’s the truth. You matter to me, you know.” 

“I know,” Kaveh sighs. “Which is why… we have to talk about this.”

“Right.” Alhaitham cocks his head to the side, silently beckoning Kaveh to continue. 

“It’s just that…” Kaveh wets his lips hesitantly. Alhaitham watches like a cat eyeing a canary. In the back of his mind, he chastises himself for his thoughts wandering into inappropriate territories. “Ugh, I’ll just go ahead and rip the bandaid off, alright?” 

Alhaitham nods supportively, although it seems Kaveh said that to himself rather than to Alhaitham. 

“You— you’re an awfully jealous man!” Kaveh spat out, looking embarrassed yet accusatory. “There, I said it!” 

Alhaitham pauses, taking in Kaveh’s words. 

“So?”

“Wha—” Kaveh’s face fell. “What do you mean, ‘ so’ ?!”

“I thought that was already established,” Alhaitham muses. 

“You— you are impossible ! That’s the whole issue, Haitham!” Kaveh nearly yells. “We— we’re together now. I… I love you, you know this. But you get so… so jealous. You know I- I belong to you, yet you’re threatened by Pitar of all people. He’s married!”   

Alhaitham’s heart flutters at the casual mention of their bond, their relationship. The soft I love you that leaves Kaveh’s mouth so naturally, as if the universe sculpted Kaveh’s pretty pink lips just to say those words perfectly, beautifully. 

Then his mood sours as Kaveh mentions Pitar. So what if the scholar was married? Alhaitham swears Pitar was giving Kaveh too many lecherous looks. 

“Well—” 

“Don’t even start,” Kaveh interrupts, pushing a finger to Alhaitham’s lips. “Let me continue before I lose track.” 

Alhaitham nods, smirking as he presses a soft kiss to Kaveh’s finger. 

Kaveh turns bright red, his finger retracting instantly. “And don’t try to distract me either! Ugh!” 

Kaveh takes a breath before he continues. “As I was saying. You’re always unnecessarily jealous. It makes me,” his voice cracks, and Alhaitham’s eyes widen with alarm when he spots tears forming at the corners of Kaveh’s eyes, “I-It makes me wonder if you think I’m… I’m unloyal, or something. I know I’ve had… a lot of lovers in the past. So I… I wonder if, sometimes, if you think I’m easy.”

“Easy?” Alhaitham repeats, confusion coloring his eyes. “No—”

“Shush,” Kaveh interrupts again, glaring at Alhaitham with teary eyes. The way his tears swim across his red eyes reminds Alhaitham of the sun at the peak of the desert. Hot, furious redness, wavering from the heat. “‘M not done yet, Haitham.”

Alhaitham obediently remains silent. Still, he can’t just sit patiently while his lover is crying because of him. So he gently cups Kaveh’s face, wiping away the stray tears with his thumbs as he lovingly holds Kaveh in place. 

I love you, his gesture reassures silently. Don’t cry. I love you. 

“I-I know you probably don’t think this, but sometimes I can’t help but… irrationally wonder if you do. If you think that, just because I’ve had many lovers, I’d leave you for… for anyone else.” Kaveh looks down, his eyes downcast. He leans into Alhaitham’s touch, like a cat begging for more rubs. He looks back up at Alhaitham. “You don’t think that, do you?”

Alhaitham shakes his head. His hands lower as they settle on Kaveh’s hips. A gentle, warm hold. Half an embrace. A promise of love, of protection, of a bond that he will never break. “Never. I have never and will never think that.” 

Kaveh smiles, relieved yet his ruby eyes are dull with self-doubt. “Then what? Why? Why are you so… so jealous? It was cute at first, but… I can’t keep up. Truth be told, sometimes, I find it exhausting.” 

Alhaitham’s heart clenches terribly. Cold, unforgiving fear strikes his heart and he feels unable to think. He remembers the first time Kaveh was seriously mad at him for being so jealous. 

Control, Alhaitham had told himself at the time. That day, Kaveh forgave him. Another day, he may find it unbearable. Is today that day?

“I…” Alhaitham begins, unsure how to articulate his thoughts. He was never really good with sharing feelings as he was with facts. He decides to be concise and sharp, straightforward as he always is. No room for misunderstanding. “I have this fear.”

Kaveh knits his brows and beckons for Alhaitham to continue. So Alhaitham continues. “I fear that one day, you will get tired of me and leave me for another.” 

Immediately, Kaveh’s reaction is to shake his head vigorously, denying Alhaitham’s words as if his life depends on it. “I won’t! Never! Alhaitham, I...” He pauses, then stops. Giving Alhaitham the chance to continue. 

“I know,” Alhaitham sighs. “Likewise, it is… an irrational fear.” 

“Really? You are not typically an irrational man,” Kaveh says, caressing Alhaitham’s cheek softly, comfortingly. 

“I am still a man.” Alhaitham presses a soft kiss on Kaveh’s hand. “I’m still a human being, contrary to popular belief.” 

Kaveh huffs an exasperated sigh. 

“And,” Alhaitham continues hesitantly, an unfamiliar state of being for a confident man such as him, “I’m not… a human being that shares your interests. I don’t understand architecture like you do. I don’t appreciate art the way you do. And that’s a fact, a truth.” 

Kaveh frowns. He shakes his head, giving Alhaitham a half-shrug. “Okay, and? So what if you don’t?” 

Alhaitham frowns back. “So,” he answers, “what if you find someone who does enjoy art the way you do? Someone who connects better with you?” 

“Then they become my friend, maybe,” Kaveh remarks simply. Then he smiles at the way Alhaitham’s expression falls ever so slightly. “But they won’t become my lover. Because that’s you, Haitham. I love you, not because of our shared interests, but because you’re you. You’re insufferable and annoying, you’re rude and never close my door after you leave my room, and I’m still mad at you for rejecting my proposals, but you also… you’re also tender and gentle, you kiss like you truly love me, and you never fail to make me breakfast.” 

“In return, you never do the dishes,” Alhaitham half-complains, half-jokes (mostly complains). Still, his heart warms as Kaveh recounts the little, domestic things about their relationship. It’s validating, a confirmation that their love is true, that Kaveh does love him the way he loves the architect. 

“Shut up,” Kaveh laughs. He continues, “You always pick me up from the tavern, spend your lunch breaks with me, and you listen to me rave on and on about topics you never cared about. Really, who does that? How could I leave you for another man? You’re perfect, Haitham. I wouldn’t want someone who’s the same as me. I’d want… you. Just you.” 

“Kaveh,” Alhaitham breathes, “you truly mean that?” 

“Of course I do, you buffoon.” Kaveh smiles. It’s soft and comforting, a small fire that captivates Alhaitham, capturing his entire heart and being. “Of course I mean it.” 

Of course, Kaveh states simply. As confident as one would say one plus one is two, as unshakable as one would say the sky is blue. As sure as Alhaitham would, one day, say I love you too. 

Alhaitham kisses Kaveh on the lips this time, desperate and passionate. His kiss sings a tale; a tale of Alhaitham’s longing and desires, his hunger and satisfaction. He kisses Kaveh possessively, as if harking to Kaveh’s long list of suitors that Kaveh is his and he is Kaveh’s. To challenge the stars to dare and take away Kaveh from his grip. To declare that he won’t let go. 

Kaveh breaks the kiss with a gulp of air, his face red and eyes frazzled. Despite his flustered state, he gives Alhaitham a big, happy smile. 

I made him smile like that, Alhaitham realizes with a happy jolt of his heart. He’s the reason why the Light of Kshahrewar is brighter than ever, challenging the planets that dominated the light of stars in their night sky. What a beautiful picture. 

“Well then,” Kaveh says breathlessly as he recovers from the kiss, a wobbly smile on his red face, “allow me to show you… that I belong to you, and only you. For all of eternity. Yeah?” 

“Yes, please,” Alhaitham murmurs, softly begging, his eyes hooded. 

“Please?” Kaveh repeats with a teasing tilt to his almost-breathless voice. His soft, elegant fingers stroke Alhaitham’s arms sensually, in an unsaid declaration of love and comfort. I’m here, Kaveh’s faint touches promise.   

“Please.” 

Alhaitham cranes his neck, pursuing Kaveh’s lips, a sense of hungry desperation following him like a lingering wave. He hesitantly, but securely, places his hands on Kaveh’s hips, holding him close. Closer. He wants to be even closer. 

“Haitham,” Kaveh gasps into the kiss, squirming, “b-bedroom. Not here.” 

“Why not? I want you now.” Alhaitham murmurs, his tight hold on Kaveh not relenting. 

Kaveh huffs as he forcibly shoves Alhaitham’s hands off. “You can wait the few minutes it takes to get to the bed, you impatient man.”

“No I can’t,” Alhaitham protests but he allows Kaveh to break free, guiding the two of them to Alhaitham’s bedroom. 

“Well that’s too bad,” Kaveh snarks, rolling his eyes, “but may I remind you; last time you were too impatient to go to the bedroom, I suffered terrible back pains for days!” 

“Hmpf. I concede,” Alhaitham says with a smug smile. 

“You, giving up? Hah.” Kaveh rolls his eyes with a sarcastic scoff. “A miracle on Teyvat.” 

“A miracle? I believe the only miracle here is you.” 

Kaveh’s ears turn red as his back suddenly greets Alhaitham. “Can you not say such— such sappy things right before we’re about to…!”

Alhaitham chuckles softly. The moment they step into his bedroom, his hands are on Kaveh, taking off Kaveh’s excessive accessories with haste. He pushes Kaveh into his bed, their bed, and leers at Kaveh beneath him with an almost twisted grin on his face. 

Kaveh’s legs immediately spread open, settling on either side of Alhaitham, and he feels his dick harden at the reflexive movement. They moved so naturally, as if Kaveh’s slender legs belonged to Alhaitham’s waist, as if the only purpose they serve is to be hooked around Alhaitham and bring them closer in all senses. 

“S-slow down!” Kaveh complains as one of his sashes' pins got stuck in his hair. “I’m right here, Haitham, I’m not going anywhere!” 

“I am an impatient man,” Alhaitham says as he captures Kaveh’s lips in a searing kiss. Their lips lock together, moving together in a mutual state of obsession. He unclasps Kaveh’s cape, discarding the numerous sashes adorning Kaveh’s shoulders and waist. A sly hand pushes past the sinfully low v-line collar, exploring the skin underneath the shirt. Alhaitham cups Kaveh’s chest harshly, his thumb and pointer finger pinching Kaveh’s soft nipples. 

“Ngh!” Kaveh jolts at the sudden bolt of pleasure, briefly pulling away from Alhaitham. 

Alhaitham chases after Kaveh’s lips eagerly, like a thirsty man crawling to an oasis in the desert. He uses his entire body to pin down Kaveh, as if nailing his lover to the bed. His thumb caresses the bruised nipples softly, and Kaveh moans just a bit louder at the administration. 

“H-Haitham,” Kaveh pants, arching his back against the bed. He weakly swats at his shirt, as if annoyed that it’s still not off. “Just… just take off— shirt— my shirt— already!” 

“Who’s the impatient one now?” Even as Alhaitham snarks with a pleased grin on his face, he’s clearly just as impatient as he finally pulls Kaveh’s shirt over his head. The shirt lands somewhere across the room without a care from either man. 

“Shut u— ah!” Kaveh’s retort abruptly stops as Alhaitham cups his half-hard cock. His leg jolts at the sudden pleasure and Kaveh leans towards the touch, desperate for more friction, his thighs quivering with anticipation. 

“I can’t hold back anymore. Not when you’re in front of me, looking so beautiful.” Alhaitham murmurs heatedly. He takes off Kaveh’s pants swiftly and doesn’t stop until Kaveh’s finally bare before him. He takes in the milky smooth skin before him, flushed pink from pleasure, writhing as his hand strokes Kaveh’s dick. A thin layer of sweat coats Kaveh’s skin, making him look all the more desirable, beautiful, fuckable.   

“Mnn, not fair,” Kaveh whines, his head thrown back. “T-take off your clothes too, Haitham. I want… want to see you too, bastard.” 

Alhaitham smiles as he complies without a comment. He quickly takes off his clothes, his body burning with the desire to fuck Kaveh hard and rough, to hold out Kaveh’s promise to its full potential, to wreck Kaveh in a way only he can.

Once he’s free of any clothes, Alhaitham quickly refocuses on Kaveh’s body once again. He lowers his head and kisses the insides of Kaveh’s thighs, sucking on the skin harshly. Angry red blotches appear as he trails his kisses upwards, blossoming like perverse flowers. Soon, they will develop into beautiful red and purple bruises only he can see. The thought makes Alhaitham suck just a bit harder, a bit more desperate. Like a depraved artist, drawing a sinful picture from the deepest depths of his filthy imagination. 

“Haitham! Stop— stop teasin— ngh!” Kaveh’s hips buck against Alhaitham’s eager lips. 

Alhaitham scoffs a small laugh into Kaveh’s supple skin. He decides to stop teasing his poor lover and takes Kaveh's throbbing cock into his mouth. 

Kaveh inhales sharply, one hand cupping his mouth and the other gripping Alhaitham’s hair tightly. His muscles strain as he mewls out weakly, “H-Haitham!” 

Alhaitham hollows his cheeks, sucking harder and eagerly lapping any pre-cum that leaks out. His head bobs slowly as he finds a rhythm, finding pleasure in the way Kaveh moans breathlessly, the way Kaveh roughly pulls his hair. Heat pools in his stomach and he wants more. 

Sloppy and dirty; the blowjob is simply sloppy and pure dirtiness. Alhaitham swirls his tongue around Kaveh’s tip in the harsh, unforgiving pace he knows Kaveh loves. Kaveh's cock hits the back of his throat but he doesn't find it to be a punishment. Rather, he eagerly takes it. 

Kaveh rewards him with a loud moan. He tugs Alhaitham’s hair harsher which Alhaitham grunts at. Not because it hurts, but because he enjoys the sensation. “Archons, Haitham, fuck. Jus— just like that, please.”

Alhaitham obliges fervently. He swallows Kaveh deeper, caresses him harder, and grazes his teeth ever so slightly over the sensitive organ.

“Teeth!” Kaveh squeaks out, followed by a groan. “Haitham!” 

Alhaitham slides a long, apologetic lick along Kaveh’s tip.     

“Haitham, please fuck— fuck me already,” Kaveh babbles, tears welling in the corner of his eyes. His legs tighten around Alhaitham’s head, knees buckling weakly, grip on Alhaitham’s hair loosening and tightening again. “Please, Haitham, ngh, can’t handle it anymore.” 

“You beg so beautifully.” Alhaitham pulls away, breathing heavily at Kaveh’s words. Kaveh's legs collapse on either side of him and he smiles faintly. “How can I deny such a request?” 

Blindly rummaging through their nightstand, Alhaitham eventually finds a small bottle and quickly uncorks it, slathering his fingers with a generous amount of oil. 

“Spread yourself for me.” 

Kaveh’s breath hitches at Alhaitham’s command. “W-what?” 

“Do it,” Alhaitham repeats himself with a dark tone to his husky voice, “for me. You said you'd show me that you belong to me, forever. Prove it, Kaveh.” 

“You are—” Kaveh’s flushed face darkens, as he looks away in embarrassment. He grits his teeth, deciding to give in without a fight for once. “Fine, whatever.” 

Kaveh’s shaky hands creep down to his reddened ass, spreading the round flesh apart and showing off his puckered hole for Alhaitham’s greedy eyes. The tight ring of muscle pulses, coaxing Alhaitham enticingly and making him crave Kaveh even more. His cock hardens as Kaveh readily presents himself to Alhaitham. 

“Just like that,” Alhaitham praises. He presses a finger against Kaveh’s hole, slowly pushing in, watching Kaveh shudder. He slowly pushes in, Kaveh's whimpers encouraging him to go slower and slower. The sight of his finger being swallowed hungrily by Kaveh, however, makes him want to hurry up and push his cock deep in Kaveh already. 

"Add... add another finger already," Kaveh turns his head back and stares at Alhaitham with a hazy, hungry look in his carmine eyes. A challenge and a beg all at once. 

Alhaitham obliges with a second finger, then a third shortly after. Kaveh moans as Alhaitham picks up speed, his back arching upwards, his hands shakily losing grip of his ass. Alhaitham leans forward and takes Kaveh's throat, sloppily kissing and sucking with feverish want, his breathing ragged. 

"H-Haitham, please," Kaveh half-sobs, letting out a breathy sigh and a hic, pushing his reddening ass towards Alhaitham even more, writhing so prettily for Alhaitham, "'m all ready. Just... just fuck me!" 

"How can I refuse such a dirty, desperate plea?" Alhaitham chuckles, pulling out his fingers and rimming Kaveh's thoroughly abused hole with the head of his cock. A mixture of pre-come and lubricant oil helps him slide in with ease, and he keeps pushing with soft grunts until he bottoms out completely. He lazily trails his mouth upwards and takes Kaveh's mouth, biting it just harsh enough for Kaveh to cry out. 

For a moment, they are still, simply relishing in the moment. The way Kaveh is stuffed full with Alhaitham, the way Kaveh's soft sobs resonates perfectly with Alhaitham's pants. Alhaitham has one hand on Kaveh's waist, gripping the soft skin possessively, as if afraid Kaveh would disappear if he so much as loosen his hold. As if the tightness is an intimate promise. If his harsh clench hurt, Kaveh doesn't show a single sign of discomfort. His other hand holds up Kaveh's leg, flaunting the limb like a trophy so it can grant him easier access, and he places it gently on his shoulder. He lowers that hand until it nestles comfortably, soothingly, on Kaveh's upper thigh. Going along with the new position, Kaveh's hands fall to his side contently. 

Alhaitham slowly pulls back until only his tip is in, then snaps his hips forward, quick and hard. His grip on Kaveh's waist tightens, holding Kaveh in place as he pulls back once more. His other hand's fingernails dig deep crescents on Kaveh's thigh. 

Kaveh gasps at the unexpected movement, then moans blissfully when Alhaitham thrusts once again. Harsh and unforgiving, lustful and dirty. 

Alhaitham establishes a brutal pace, fucking Kaveh like they're not promised a next time. Kaveh lurches upwards when Alhaitham hits the lucky spot, and he grins wildly as he aims for the spot again. 

"Fuck!" Kaveh yells, his voice chopped in broken moans. His shoulders raise to his ears, clenching his eyes shut as drool dribbles down the side of his chin. "Jus' like that, Haitham, fuck, you're so— hah!— you feel so good, please, please—" 

Alhaitham groans deeply, keeping the pace steady and rough. His forehead beads with sweat. 

"You're taking me so well," Alhaitham's knees buckle as he feels his orgasm building up. His hold on Kaveh slackens. "Mn, fuck. I'm coming." 

"Cum in me," Kaveh demands, "I- I'm coming too, Ha—aitham." 

"Together," Alhaitham says. 

Kaveh nods desperately. His hands shakily grasp his cock and he pumps it quickly, trying to match Alhaitham's pace.

Alhaitham reclaims Kaveh's lips as heat pools in his stomach. Like magma waiting to burst, like the mere nanosecond before water tension breaks. Kaveh groans into their kiss as he comes undone before Alhaitham's hands, and that was enough to tip Alhaitham over the edge. 

It almost felt too short. Alhaitham wants more of Kaveh until Kaveh pushes him away, Alhaitham wants more of Kaveh until he physically can't stand. Alhaitham wants to kiss Kaveh for eternity and do nothing but embrace his lover. 

For a blissful moment, the two stare at each other, panting. A smile breaks out on Kaveh's face, and Alhaitham collapses from exhaustion, both physical and emotional. He buries his nose in the space between Kaveh's throat and shoulder and takes a deep breath. 

"Gross," Kaveh utters, his voice raspy and tired. There's a hint of a laugh that's creeping in his word, so Alhaitham knows that Kaveh is only speaking to fill the silence. 

Alhaitham shuts him up with a soft and slow, thoroughly gentle, kiss. Kaveh twitches and accepts the kiss happily. The action is so enticingly adorable, Alhaitham has to inwardly remind himself of his human physiology to calm down. 

They have all the time in the world. Alhaitham knows because when he glances up, Kaveh's half-lidded, blissed out eyes are smiling wider than his lips. They're bright, like twin red stars that not even the finest telescopes of the Rtawahist darshan would ever properly capture. 

"I lov—e you," Kaveh says softly. 

Alhaitham is unsure whether to credit the voice crack to exhaustion or emotion. He opens his mouth. Then closes it. He glances at Kaveh once again, and is met with a look he can't decipher. An expression that equals a thousand, perhaps ten, ancient Sumeran puzzles left behind in fragments. That Alhaitham will decipher a hundred lifetimes of mirror shards before he could decipher the soft, fond look mixed with a flurry of emotions. 

The silence, unawkward but loud, is broken by Kaveh as he tries to push Alhaitham off of him. His gaze refuses to meet Alhaitham's. "M-move," he complains as he tries to wrestle out of Alhaitham's hold, "I don't want your gross semen drying inside of me. Get off, you brute!" 

Alhaitham smiles, stopping Kaveh in his tracks, and presses a simple kiss on Kaveh's collarbone and, pressing the small smile against it, pressing his love to Kaveh, and lovingly whispers, "I love you too." 

iv. summer light grows new branches and leaves

The next hangout between the four of them goes without a hitch. Kaveh isn't sure if it's because of the previous night or simply because Teyvat is joyous today. He and Alhaitham arrive at their designated table, having already spotted their friends.  

Kaveh gives Tighnari a thumbs-up, a comedically unsubtle wink, and a wide grin. Thank you! He mouths to the man, whose initial welcoming smile rapidly deteriorate into something more like pained acceptance. Tighnari gives him a nod before turning his gaze to Alhaitham. 

"Hey guys," Tighnari says. His voice is strained. Besides him, Cyno chortles but stops immediately when Tighnari elbows him. Tighnari gives them a wary look. "You guys are glowing." 

Kaveh laughs panickly, a bit off-key and clearly not genuine, and grabs a chair. "Thanks! The weather is lovely today." 

"Lovely weather," Cyno repeats in his usual enigmatic way.

"Yup." Kaveh nods. "Lovely weather." 

Probably simply for shits and giggles, Tighnari adds, "Lovely weather." Because despite how helpful and kind he can be, he can also be a real sarcastic pain in the ass. Kaveh shoots the foxman a subtle glare and receives a ruthlessly cold smirk in return.  

"Lovely weather," Alhaitham joins. Kaveh resists giving Alhaitham a betrayed look. Alhaitham probably has no idea about the silent conversation between the other three, or why they're stupidly repeating the stupid phrase. 

"You guys suck," Kaveh complains anyway. Much to his chagrin, the group laughs at him, as if they're the ones with a secret conversation.

"I'm sure you guys did plenty last n—" 

"CYNO!"