Chapter Text
“Carla?”
DS Lisa Swain called out her fiancée’s name when she arrived home from work that evening. She was later than she had intended but she had picked up some flowers and a box of chocolates on her way back, hoping it would go some small way towards making Carla feel better over the loss of Connie. The baby had been difficult to manage with two full time jobs and they’d been good for nothing but passing out in bed at the end of each long day. But they had loved having her. Carla had been shocked to discover that she was a natural, wonderful parent. And in the small, happy moments of their days, Lisa had allowed her to imagine what life could have been. For both of them. For Carla, if she had been granted the opportunity to be a mother. And for Lisa, if she had met Carla earlier and skipped Becky out completely. They would have been the team she had only dreamt about during the course of her previous marriage.
She pulled out her phone when it beeped.
In the bath, the message said.
Smiling to herself, Lisa crossed the kitchen and busied herself with putting the flowers in water. She kicked off her shoes and hung her jacket on the banister. Then she took the chocolates and knocked on the bathroom door.
“If you’re Lisa, come in. If you’re someone else, I really wouldn’t unless you want to see me naked.”
Lisa grinned and opened the door.
“I always want to see you naked,” she said, entering the room and closing the door behind her.
Her eyes roamed over Carla, laid back in the bath, hair up in a messy bun. She crossed the room and crouched beside her, arms resting on the bath.
“Hi,” she said.
“Hi,” Carla replied.
Lisa leant in closer and kissed her. Her lips were soft and wet and incredibly inviting.
“Here,” she said, offering the box of chocolates.
They were Carla’s favourite. The brunette smiled lovingly at her.
“You didn’t have to do that,” Carla said softly. “And I’m sorry I was in a mood earlier.”
Lisa allowed herself a quiet smile. It was one of the many things she loved about their relationship. That they could be who they were and how they felt and the other would always be kind to them. That they knew what they needed to do to help each other feel better. Earlier in the week, Lisa had needed firm hugs and kind words. Today, Carla had needed reassurance and space.
“Oh, so you were in a mood,” she teased.
Carla apologised again. Lisa leant in and kissed her once more.
“You’re allowed to be sad, Carla,” she said. “You love Connie. I love Connie. She’s become a huge part of our lives and we’re going to miss her. She was such a joy.”
Carla smiled sadly. She had already cried once in this bath and was fully expecting it to take over her again.
“She was,” she said.
She gazed into Lisa’s eyes for a moment.
“Thank you.”
“What for?”
“Propping me up,” Carla said. “I just… I wasn’t expecting to love her, you know?”
“I know,” Lisa said. “You didn’t want us to take her.”
“But I’m so glad you persuaded me. I’m so glad you showed me what to do. How to be there for her.”
Lisa put the chocolates on the floor. She found Carla’s hand under the water.
“You would have figured it out yourself,” she said certainly.
But Carla shook her head.
“I wouldn’t have been able to,” she said. “I wouldn’t have known how. I didn’t know how to change nappies or warm milk or anything like that, Lisa. But you were so lovely. You listened. You cared. You stuck to your word and you showed me how to take care of her. You’re the only person who…”
She broke off. Tearful. Lisa used her free hand to cup Carla’s face and brush her tears away.
“You’re the only person who has that must faith in me. And the only partner I’ve ever had who…”
She took a moment to breathe. Lisa waited patiently.
“The only partner I’ve ever had that supports me so completely and makes me feel so safe.”
Lisa swallowed. She was starting to feel tearful herself now.
“Always.”
The promise was simple but it was enough to open the dam. They both began to cry. Lisa gathered Carla up in her arms and held her close.
“I’m getting you soaked,” Carla realised, trying to draw away.
But Lisa held firm.
“I don’t care,” she said.
She pressed a kiss to the side of Carla’s head, stroking her hands up and down her bare back.
“I love you,” Lisa said softly.
“I love you too,” Carla said. “And I am sor…”
Lisa cut her off. She drew away enough to look into her fiancée’s eyes.
“You don’t need to apologise,” Lisa said. “You didn’t do anything wrong.”
“I didn’t say ‘I love you’ when you left. We always say that.”
Lisa smiled affectionately at her. She stroked her cheek with the back of her hand.
“I did say it,” Carla added. “But you’d gone.”
Lisa gazed at her, full of wonder and love.
“On the upside…” Carla said, casting her eyes down to Lisa’s work shirt, which was now clinging to her.
Lisa noticed. She smirked.
“Well, yeah,” she agreed. “That’s true. Because it’s been a while since we were able to…”
Carla grinned. She kissed her urgently.
“Let me just get out and…”
“No,” Lisa said, guiding Carla to lie back again. “Stay here. Let me take care of you.”
The two women gazed at each other for a moment. Lisa’s eyes travelled down from Carla’s face to her nipples poking just through the surface of the water. She reached out one hand and cupped her right breast, teasing its peak with her thumb. Then she moved closer, to her left one.
Carla lay back against the bath and closed her eyes, moaning quietly at Lisa’s touch. She couldn’t help but smile when Lisa’s hand drifted lower, beneath the bubbles. The blonde ran her fingers over her tummy and along her thighs. Carla parted them wider, welcoming her as she settled between her legs.
Carla moaned again, a happy smile on her face, as Lisa’s index finger slipped through her folds.
“I’ve missed you,” she breathed.
“Mmm…” Lisa said as dreamily as Carla had. “I’ve missed you.”
Carla allowed herself to relax completely. To comply with all of Lisa’s attention. Lisa circled her entrance, pushing just a little inside. She withdrew. Carla chased the contact. Lisa moved her finger upwards, exploring gently.
“Lise…” Carla managed.
Lisa pressed the digit to Carla’s clit, making her cry out.
“Wow,” Carla breathed.
She opened her eyes and smiled. As expected, Lisa was preening. She had always been one for praise. In fact, sex was the only situation where the blonde didn’t bat compliments away. Carla beckoned her closer. Lisa leant in and kissed her, long and deep. She moved her finger back down. Carla complained audibly about the loss of contact but the moan became filthy when she added a finger and thrust deep inside her.
They continued to kiss, as Lisa swiped over her clit with her thumb. She broke their kiss, pressing her lips to Carla’s jaw, neck and collarbone instead. She ran her tongue along her soapy shoulders. Her mouth hit the water, easily finding her nipple, wet and hard. She closed her eyes, her hands continuing to work, as she nipped and sucked at her breast.
Carla felt her legs beginning to tremble, as Lisa touched her in a way that nobody ever had. Until the November morning that Carla had said the words that had become infamous between them.
Don’t get dressed.
“Lise, I…” Carla started.
Lisa let go of her nipple, fingers never missing a beat. She smiled lovingly at her.
“Let go for me, darling,” she whispered, pressing their mouths together again.
Carla cried out into Lisa’s mouth, her walls tightening around her fingers, as she came. No longer caring about the state of Lisa’s work attire, Carla wrapped her arms around Lisa’s neck, pulling her closer and deepening their kiss.
“I love you,” she whispered.